Are Bobs Really the Nicest Guys? Debunking the Theory of No Evil Bobs

[Math Is Hard]

I have this theory that there are no evil Bobs. I base this on the fact that I never met a Bob I didn’t like. Historically, the name Bob does not lend itself to infamy. There are no “Bob the Rippers”, no “Bob the Impalers”, etc.

This is not to suggest that there are no evil Roberts. I’ve known a few. But Bobs are special. Bobs are an extremely good-natured subset of Roberts, and I have never known a Bob that was the slightest bit evil in nature. I have discovered that I actually have a Bob bias. In fact, when choosing a professor, I'll seek out the ones named Robert and if I can find out that he goes by Bob, I'll sign up for the course immediately.

So prove me wrong. Post your evil Bob stories here.

 

[Danger]

I Post your evil Bob stories here.

Bob Newhart is truly evil. His phone call to Sir Walter Raleigh was so funny it made me start smoking.

 

[brewnog]

The only Bob I know is sound as a pound. He's so nice that we can call him Ugly Bob, and he doesn't even care! In fact, he likes it!

 

[BicycleTree]

The only Bob I know is sound as a pound. He's so nice that we can call him Ugly Bob, and he doesn't even care! In fact, he likes it!

But in his basement laboratory, late at night, Bob is making plans...

 

[Hurkyl]

Eevviill plans?

 

[Math Is Hard]

I'm remain convinced that Bob-liness is next to God-liness.

 

[mattmns]

So far looking good. I do not know any evil bobs either!

 

[zoobyshoe]

Math Is Hard, you are on to something. It is fully supported by this well know Hollywood lore I just made up:

On the set of any film where Robert DeNiro plays a good character, everyone refers to him as "Bob". But when he plays evil people, like in Cape Fear, everyone on the set calls him "Robert."

 

[Pengwuino]

My uncles name is Bob and he's great! I also knew a few roberts back in high school and they were all cool.

 

[zoobyshoe]

And, whooaaah! Check this out:

"Robert" spelled backward, is:

Trebor

But "Bob" spelled backward, is:

Bob

It really makes you think.

 

[quantumdude]

Does The Dread Pirate Roberts count?

 

[Math Is Hard]

It really makes you think.

No, it doesn't, actually. I want examples of evil Bobs. Eeeeeevil Bobs! I don't think there are any.

And, thanks for your input Tom, but...

Roberts <> Bob.

p.s. I'm not sure there are any evil Toms either, but I'm not ready to present that theory yet. I need more evidence, and I still have to work around that "Uncle Tom's Cabin" problem.

 

[gonpost]

I once knew an evil Bob...

He hit his children...my mother never even knew it...

But he's gone now. :)

 

[Math Is Hard]

I once knew an evil Bob...

He hit his children...my mother never even knew it...

But he's gone now. :)

Thank you. I appreciate your being so candid. This is the stuff that could dismantle my theory. I can't help but wonder how others perceived him, even though you knew the truth about him.

 

[Janus]

No, it doesn't, actually. I want examples of evil Bobs. Eeeeeevil Bobs! I don't think there are any.

And, thanks for your input Tom, but...

Well, there is this guy:

http://boblordofevil.keenspace.com/

 

[Hurkyl]

And a google search yields http://chicapanzy.keenspace.com/.

 

[mattmns]

SIDESHOW BOB! Or do fictional characters not count?

 

[Math Is Hard]

Damn! My theory weakens. I must call the university and postpone the reading of the thesis. And cancel the caterer, too. I'm not ready to defend.

However, let me just say this: I'm not completely convinced, except for one instance, of evil Bobs occurring in nature. In the fictional cases, I think that the authors merely desire to create a humorous irony in juxtaposing the name Bob with our traditional concepts of evil. It is the very "non-evilness" of the benign name of Bob that leads him/her to do such a thing in the first place.

More research is needed.

 

[Moonbear]

I know of an evil Bobby who cheated on his wife and ran out on his kids without paying child support (car salesman to boot), but as far as I know, he never went by the name Bob.

But the Bob I know is the most laid-back, mellow sort of person you've ever met.

 

[Lisa!]

Your theory is great and I think there are lots of evil Bobs because I hate this name I think you shouldn't start proving your theory here by asking members' oppinion.you know you should ask some of members "what's your name?",so you were able to develope your theory better.I mean there was no need to redo everything for evil Toms...

 

[Math Is Hard]

I found something kinda interesting this morning:

"Generally, the longer a man's name, the more likely it is that he will be viewed as honest and accomplished. However, for people who want to be considered part of a group, it is better to have a short name or use a nickname, a lesson that both Bob Dole and Bill Clinton have learned."

And its seems that Bobs are non-presidential as well as non-evil:

"There have been three American presidents named William - McKinley, Taft and Clinton - and none named Robert."

http://www.pitt.edu/utimes/issues/29/101096/02.html

 

[Math Is Hard]

I've struck gold! There's a BOB CLUB!

http://www.thebobclub.com/

"As a rule, Bobs are generally good-natured people, despite some of the goofy nick-names people come up with for us. It seems that some people can't be satisfied with just calling us "Bob". They have to add stuff to it, like "Bob-A-Loo", "Bob-A-Reno", "Bob-A-Linsky", and other odd variations. And, there's always someone who thinks they are being original by calling a Bob "Boob". It's B-O-B. It's is not hard to spell, and even easier to say, but some folks just can't get it right no matter how hard they try! Being the good natured souls that we are, however, we just nod and smile and go on with living the life of Bob."

 

[JamesU]

MIH, do i detect a hint of BToli?

 

[Math Is Hard]

MIH, do i detect a hint of BToli?

yomamma, I swear I am being sincere. There's something to this Bob thing.

 

[JamesU]

could this be an effect of the zoloft?

 

[zoobyshoe]

And, there's always someone who thinks they are being original by calling a Bob "Boob".

Yes, but think about it. What's "Boob" spelled backward?

 

[mapper]

Anyone that has a verb for a name is ok in my books.

 

[Math Is Hard]

Anyone that has a verb for a name is ok in my books.

Even a Skip or a Trip? How about Dash?

 

[Moonbear]

They have to add stuff to it, like "Bob-A-Loo", "Bob-A-Reno", "Bob-A-Linsky", and other odd variations.

Now I'm really wondering here...I had a great-uncle who my grandmother and grandfather used to call Bob-a-loo, but his name was Alexander. I always figured it was some mean childhood nickname that my grandmother called him and he got stuck with. He was a nice guy too though, at least to the extent he could be, so maybe the Bob-ness rubbed off. He had pretty severe Parkinson's, so couldn't talk well or do much, but once in a while would do something really nice, totally out of the blue for his grand-nieces and nephews. Like he'd send us all money for Easter outfits so we could have something really special to wear (he couldn't pick them out or go shopping with us, but he could give us the money and tell us that's what we were supposed to use it for so our parents couldn't make us put it all in the bank like they usually did when we got money as a gift).

 

[JamesU]

could Bob saget be considered evil because every time someone turns on his show they have to sit theough his jokes?

 

[DocToxyn]

Anyone that has a verb for a name is ok in my books.

Russell is a good verb/moniker, so is Pat.

 

[brewnog]

Russell is a good verb/moniker, so is Pat.

And Dick, Phil and Roger too.

 

[mapper]

you guys may get a kick outta this site.
http://www.bobsagetisgod.com/

 

[JamesU]

you guys may get a kick outta this site.
http://www.bobsagetisgod.com/

that site is repulsive

 

[Hurkyl]

Isn't Phil the Prince of Insufficient Light?