Are good manners moribund at PF?

[Studiot]

I note two recent joiners posting questions yesterday, but not returning to their threads again, even to thank those who put effort into answers.

Yet those same members are back today with more questions answered but not acknowledged.

I will not name the members but this seems all too common, something I at least find pretty discouraging.

Do others also find this?

 

[stevenb]

I note two recent joiners posting questions yesterday, but not returning to their threads again, even to thank those who put effort into answers.

Yet those same members are back today with more questions answered but not acknowledged.

I will not name the members but this seems all too common, something I at least find pretty discouraging.

Do others also find this?

It's somewhat similar to something that happens in real life. You walk in a door and notice a woman behind you coming also. You hold the door out of courtesy, and she walks past you, and does not nod, smile or say thank you. Apparently, she feels you are the doorman, put on Earth to make her life easier.

 

[DaveC426913]

As PF's popularity grows, it attracts people from ever farther and wider. The distribution of behavior widens.

Think of the difference between the behavior of 100 people you'll encounter in a small town, versus the behavior of 100 people you'll encounter in a megacity. It's not (necessarily) that they're more rude or crazy in a megacity, it's that the distribution of all behaviors is wider.

 

[nobahar]

I almost always say thankyou. I generally only forget if I visit the site without signing in, find the post and say to myself "I'll sign in later", but forget.

 

[symbolipoint]

Not necessary. A post of gratitude is one extra post. In some subjectively special cases, posting a thanks is still good. If I give help to a question, and my help is effective for the original poster, and the poster does not thank me, that's fine with me. If that poster gives no further comment or reply post, I just reckon he either understood the help, or just stopped dealing with the original posted question. If he'd want more, he'd ask more. If he did not need more, he posts nothing more on the topic, and if he just gave-up, maybe again nothing more posted of the topic. If he thanks members as a group but not indivudually, fine. If he thanks me, fine.

If a member asks a question for help and receives help but does not write a "thank you" post, he is not being bad mannered.

 

[dlgoff]

... but not returning to their threads again, even to thank those who put effort into answers.

Welcome to PF.

Really. You need to get use to it. You never know why people do what they do.

 

[Evo]

I think a lot of students that come here for help don't realize that we have an all volunteer staff. They may assume that the people that help are doing a job they are paid for. That could be one explanation. Still, I always try to thank people for their help even if they are paid.

 

[phinds]

I think a lot of students that come here for help don't realize that we have an all volunteer staff. They may assume that the people that help are doing a job they are paid for. That could be one explanation. Still, I always try to thank people for their help even if they are paid.

I think you're being generous to a fault. I think they are just rude louts (and I'm in a GOOD mood today).

 

[Saitama]

Maybe those new members you are talking about don't know how to behave in an online community. This has happened to me. When i firstly joined a community, i didn't understand what to write and what to reply whenever a post is there or somebody has answered to your query. Maybe we should give them some time but if they continue this, that's really a ill-mannered behavior.

 

[DaveC426913]

Maybe those new members you are talking about don't know how to behave in an online community. This has happened to me. When i firstly joined a community, i didn't understand what to write and what to reply whenever a post is there or somebody has answered to your query. Maybe we should give them some time but if they continue this, that's really a ill-mannered behavior.

I have made quite a few blunders in online communities, not being familiar with the netiquette there (they're all different). I imagine there are several people there who think I am a lout for not having known up front how the community works. I would fall into studiot/phind's bucket of rude members.

 

[rhody]

I think a lot of students that come here for help don't realize that we have an all volunteer staff. They may assume that the people that help are doing a job they are paid for. That could be one explanation. Still, I always try to thank people for their help even if they are paid.

I say a standard polite reply to remind them that they are not being courteous as a starter, and then if they continue the practice, have a mentor, remind them again with a timeout, followed by a massive ZAP! from a mentor banning gun on a following offense. After that, they can lurk to their heart's content, but not waste members time who take their valuable time to address their questions.

Rhody...

 

[Evo]

I say a standard polite reply to remind them that they are not being courteous as a starter, and then if they continue the practice, have a mentor, remind them again with a timeout, followed by a massive ZAP! from a mentor banning gun on a following offense. After that, they can lurk to their heart's content, but not waste members time who take their valuable time to address their questions.

Rhody...

We can't force anyone to say "thank you". If you are offended that a member that you helped didn't say thank you, just do not help them again. We definitely do not want our HH's to feel slighted.

 

[rhody]

We can't force anyone to say "thank you". If you are offended that a member that you helped didn't say thank you, just do not help them again. We definitely do not want our HH's to feel slighted.

I didn't mean say thanks Evo, what I meant was to acknowledge in any way when a member took time to address their question or statement when posting. Never returning to acknowledge or dispute a post in response (assuming it was a valid relevant response to their issue, and not just BS) to the original OP's post is rude, IMHO.

Rhody...

 

[Studiot]

Since Rhody is otherwise gunning for me for non return

Hello Rhody.

 

[Evo]

I didn't mean say thanks Evo, what I meant was to acknowledge in any way when a member took time to address their question or statement when posting. Never returning to acknowledge or dispute a post in response (assuming it was a valid relevant response to their issue, and not just BS) to the original OP's post is rude, IMHO.

Rhody...

I don't subscribe to threads, if I did, I'd be inundated with e-mails. So there are many times I will post and never go back, or not until I stumble upon it months later.

 

[rhody]

I don't subscribe to threads, if I did, I'd be inundated with e-mails. So there are many times I will post and never go back, or not until I stumble upon it months later.

This is true Evo, but you being a mentor, you are in a different category than just a general casual user who may have only posted in a few threads to begin with. You deal with all kinds of posting issues, PM's etc... every day, so for you not to respond right away I would cut you some slack for sure. You are too busy to worry about one post.

Rhody...

 

[rhody]

Since Rhody is otherwise gunning for me for non return

Hello Rhody.

Studiot,

Funny...

Rhody...

 

[Naty1]

I have posted questions in the past ,,,and then been away from a computer for days, maybe even a few weeks at at time, so it could appear that I queried and did not return. When I had my boat, I used to go out of state to work on it during the winter...and live aboard in NY for a week or two at a time, and for a change of pace I did NOT want a computer with me. But it sure was fun to return and see if a "catfight" had developed during my absence!

 

[epenguin]

It is not a question of being thanked or unthanked. It is being left in the air.

And it is unnecessary. I mean do the students all give up on the questions? Probably they often get the answer themselves. An answer anyway. I have often found that by the time I have formulated a question, and even asked without getting answers this has helped me find the answer myself. And if not they get the answer from classes later, a Prof. discusses or gives back homework. So most of the time they end up knowing the answer. (For some questions I'd fear for their careers if they don't.) So it wouldn't take much trouble to share it at the end.

Ideally I'd like there to be a blacklist of repeat offenders like this

I note two recent joiners posting questions yesterday, but not returning to their threads again, even to thank those who put effort into answers.

Yet those same members are back today with more questions answered but not acknowledged.

... this seems all too common, something I at least find pretty discouraging.

but as I don't doubt that is not practical this question should be advice in the general instructions of the site.

It could often do good to come back, because sometimes solutions may not be as good as the solver imagines, and also there is the Polya principle "When the problem is solved, the job is not finished". A counsel of perfection no doubt, but very often useful.

 

[Studiot]

the Polya principle "When the problem is solved, the job is not finished".

I've not heard of that one, but I did overhear someone in the toilet the other day saying

"No job is finished until the paperwork is done"



go well