Comments on PhD Statement of Purpose

  • #1
thematrix1101
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Hey guys it would be great if you could take a look at my statement of purpose for a physics PhD program included below. The "Future Work" section at the end is where I talked about the specific program and faculties and how it will be a great fit for me. Any comments, criticism, advice is appreciated!
Background

Being raised in Bangladesh and Italy and eventually moving to the United States, my life has been painted with colorful shades of diversity into a geographical, linguistic, and cultural kaleidoscope. My unique set of circumstances and experiences provide me with a broad spectrum of applicable abilities, which will play an integral role during my future PhD studies in physics.

My dynamic background has enabled me to perceive the world through a multitude of perspectives. This innate understanding of varying viewpoints allows me to recognize patterns and connections that others might overlook, enabling me to tackle challenges from innovative angles. The adaptivity I developed from engaging in three different education systems equips me to seamlessly integrate into a research lab and maintain momentum throughout my program. My diverse upbringing has also fostered an ability to connect effectively with individuals from various backgrounds, a crucial skill in the collaborative world of graduate research. Furthermore, this aptitude for collaboration encourages me to seek out interdisciplinary approaches in my scientific pursuits. I am dedicated to leveraging my global experiences to contribute meaningfully to my research, the broader scientific community, and society as a whole.

Research Goals and Experiences

Ever since I was a kid, I've been captivated by the exciting worlds of physics, computer science, and engineering. I started coding when I was in sixth grade, spending my middle school years developing video games and devouring popular scientific literature. These experiences fueled my passion for solving complex scientific and technological puzzles through hands-on approaches. As a result, I pursued a degree in physics with the dream of a research-driven career. My goal is to harness fundamental scientific principles to pioneer transformative technologies. As I immersed myself in various ventures during my undergraduate years, I found my path to be quantum science.

Despite the initial setbacks posed by COVID-19 restrictions during my first year of undergraduate studies, I was quick to grasp my first research opportunity once the restrictions were lifted. I collaborated with Prof. [Name] on his machine learning project to deduce equations of motions of mechanical systems from experimentally gathered data. After taking a seminar course on quantum computing, I discovered a profound fascination for the field that seamlessly integrates my core interests and goals. Consequently, I joined Prof. [Name]'s lab where I have been actively contributing to the experimentation and engineering of innovative superconducting quantum information processors ever since.

Superconducting Quantum Systems:. I have optimized the apparatus of the lab through a number of microwave engineering projects, paving the way for more sophisticated experiments and research ventures. These included constructing op-amp driver and logic adder circuits for pulse control, writing Python code to produce appropriate pulses from network analyzer, and building copper microwave filters for high-frequency radiation noise. For my senior Honors thesis project, I am working on the design, simulation and fabrication of graphene-based superconducting quantum devices to explore qubit platforms and study the nature of superconductivity in 2D materials.

NSF REU: To further enhance my research skills, I spent the summer after my junior year participating in [University]'s REU program in condensed matter physics. My project involved using nanofabrication techniques to build 2D van der Waals devices for studying electronic interactions in graphene. I learned how to exfoliate, stack, and fabricate vdW heterostructures, gaining certification in e-beam lithography, reactive ion etching, and metal deposition tools at University of Pennsylvania’s Singh Center for Nanotechnology. I presented a poster on my research at my program’s end-of-summer research symposium and the APS Mid-Atlantic conference.

Physics Lab Assistant: I have been working as a laboratory assistant at my institution’s Physics Lecture Hall, where I assist in the setup and maintenance of physics demonstrations for university lectures. This practical engagement has fostered in me a profound understanding of diverse scientific concepts and enhanced my technical laboratory and hands-on skills.

Broader Impacts: Outside of the lab, I have promoted science awareness and supported the scientific journey of my fellow students. I have participated in physics demonstration shows for the general public and high-school and middle-school students across my state, where I have endeavored to impart a deeper understanding of various physics topics in an entertaining and accessible manner through an array of engaging experiments. As a learning assistant in a physics laboratory course, I collaborated with instructors to supervise and guide students during their physics experiments, helping them understand scientific reasoning and experimental techniques. To assist students at the beginning of their physics studies, I volunteered as a peer mentor for the Society of Physics Students where I advise students on various aspects of succeeding in physics.

Future Work
 
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  • #2
Painful.

It doesn't start with "this is why In want to go to graduate school". It starts out with "here is an invitation to bask in my wonderfulness". That is incredibly offputting. My reaction is "I don't care how good he is - I don't want this guy in my lab."

Nobody cares what you wanted to do as a kid, nor how early you decided you wanted to be a physicist. Writing this is stale, trite, unoriginal, and doesn't address the question asked. It shows a lack of critical thinking on the part of an applicant. Do they really think that we will accept a candidate who wanted to be a physicist at 6 years old over one who decided at 7?

Your statement needs to answer the questions "Why a PhD?" and "Why a PhD here?" It does neither of those things - it's a mix of history and platitudes and wastes the committee's time by not addressing the questions asked. Not a good start.

Finally. some of the text was flagged as likely written by an AI. Do not do this. Nobody wants a grad student who tries to pull a fast one like this. Even if this is not AI-assisted in any way, run it through a checker and fix any section that it flags.

My advuice? Toss this - do not try and salvage it. Itr is not a statement of purpose.
 
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  • #3
Hmm I see how the introduction can be off-putting. The reason I wrote it like this is because the program specifically stated to mention my background and diversity and how it will help me succeed in their graduate program. The 6th grade thing was only a leeway into transitioning to my career goals, after which I’ve discussed my experiences. Finally, the “Future Work” section is where I would discuss how my experiences led me to pursue a PhD and how their program specifically meets my goals, as well as talk about faculties. I haven’t included that here.

As for the AI thing, I was told the AI checkers are extremely inaccurate and whenever I experimented with them a bit. Sometimes when I wrote something myself it was flagged, and sometimes something writtten by AI was not flagged. So I don’t know if I should limit myself for the off-chance that my own words are flagged by an unreliable software.
 
  • #4
thematrix1101 said:
As for the AI thing, I was told the AI checkers are extremely inaccurate and whenever I experimented with them a bit. Sometimes when I wrote something myself it was flagged, and sometimes something writtten by AI was not flagged. So I don’t know if I should limit myself for the off-chance that my own words are flagged by an unreliable software.
I don't know how much admissions committees are using checkers like ZeroGPT, but I would play it safe and check your essays before submitting them. It may just be that your writing style is too much like an AI chatbot -- if it happens very much, it might be a good idea to find out what that style is, and try to alter your writing style. I guess I should check some of my longer posts here on PF to see what the results are... :smile:
 
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  • #5
Why did you want feedback if you don't want to take it?

In any event, you may be right about AI generated text not getting caught and not wanting to "limit" yourself. But be very careful about this line of thinking. Departments do not want to hear down the road that one of their graduates committed scientific misconduct, and the best way to avoid this is to be careful who they admit and to look very carefully at their admissions package.

Just so you know the exposure, I have a colleague at a place where a med school graduate was found to have lied on her application. The university pulled her MD. Immediately after that, the state pulled her license. By all accounts, she was an adequate doctor. They pulled it anyway. She sued. They didn't care. This kind of academic misconduct is taken very, very seriously by universities. Don't play with fire.
 
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  • #6
thematrix1101 said:
As for the AI thing, I was told the AI checkers are extremely inaccurate and whenever I experimented with them a bit. Sometimes when I wrote something myself it was flagged, and sometimes something writtten by AI was not flagged. So I don’t know if I should limit myself for the off-chance that my own words are flagged by an unreliable software.
Better should be, you do your own thinking and your own writing. If something written by artificial intelligence is 'flagged' that is IT's fault; not your fault. Unless something is misguided in how you yourself write.
 
  • #7
Vanadium 50 said:
Why did you want feedback if you don't want to take it?

In any event, you may be right about AI generated text not getting caught and not wanting to "limit" yourself. But be very careful about this line of thinking. Departments do not want to hear down the road that one of their graduates committed scientific misconduct, and the best way to avoid this is to be careful who they admit and to look very carefully at their admissions package.

Just so you know the exposure, I have a colleague at a place where a med school graduate was found to have lied on her application. The university pulled her MD. Immediately after that, the state pulled her license. By all accounts, she was an adequate doctor. They pulled it anyway. She sued. They didn't care. This kind of academic misconduct is taken very, very seriously by universities. Don't play with fire.
No no I extremely appreciate the feedback. I was simply stating my reasonings of why I thought that was a good idea. I am currently working on the things you have mentioned and rewriting my SOP.
 

FAQ: Comments on PhD Statement of Purpose

What should be included in a PhD Statement of Purpose?

A PhD Statement of Purpose should include your academic background, research interests, relevant experiences, and career goals. It should also explain why you are interested in the specific program and how it aligns with your research aspirations. Highlighting your skills, accomplishments, and any publications or projects can also strengthen your statement.

How long should a PhD Statement of Purpose be?

Typically, a PhD Statement of Purpose should be between 500 to 1,000 words, or about one to two pages in length. It's important to adhere to any specific guidelines provided by the program you are applying to and to be concise while thoroughly covering all the necessary points.

How can I make my PhD Statement of Purpose stand out?

To make your PhD Statement of Purpose stand out, focus on being clear and specific about your research interests and how they align with the program. Use concrete examples to demonstrate your skills and experiences. Tailor your statement to each program by mentioning specific faculty members, resources, or aspects of the program that attract you. Proofreading for clarity and correctness is also crucial.

Should I mention faculty members I want to work with in my PhD Statement of Purpose?

Yes, mentioning faculty members you want to work with can be beneficial. It shows that you have researched the program and are genuinely interested in their work. Be sure to explain why their research interests align with yours and how you could contribute to their projects. However, avoid name-dropping without providing a clear connection to your research interests.

How personal should my PhD Statement of Purpose be?

While the PhD Statement of Purpose should primarily focus on your academic and research background, it is also important to include personal motivations and experiences that have shaped your interest in the field. Striking a balance between professional and personal elements can provide a more complete picture of who you are as a candidate. However, avoid overly personal or irrelevant details that do not contribute to your academic and research narrative.

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