Should I continue dating a heartbroken girl?

In summary, the girl told the guy she is still heartbroken from her last relationship and isn't ready to date again. She wasn't interested in him after he told her how he liked to hang out with her. After a few days, she told him she is still heartbroken but is not ready for a relationship. She mentioned they should be friends, but she became less interested in his messages and chats after that. After a day or so, she still replies but after a day or so. The guy is still indecisive about what to do next.
  • #1
abiyo
43
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I was going out with this awesome girl. After telling her how I liked hanging out with her, she was receptive and that day ended with good notes. A few days after while we were chatting, she told me she is still heart broken and is not ready for a relationship. She mentioned we should be friends. She used to be very eager to hang out with me before she told me this. She became less interested in my messages and chats after that. She still replies to my messages but after a day or so. Given that I text her less now(once in three days or so) just to ask how she is doing. I like this girl but is it wise to be dating someone who is not so sure about me? I am as confused as to what I should do next. any advices from PF community will be appreciated for a noob like me

peace and thanks
 
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  • #2
You are correct - it is not uncommon for someone to be running a little hot and cold when they are recovering from a breakup so her behavior is plausible. Perhaps she thought she may be ready to start again but discovered she wasn't.

It could also be a way to let you down gently after she gave you a chance.

Either way your best approach is the same - be sensitive and stand back.
You should tell her you want to give her the space she needs and to contact you when she wants to see you again, hang out, whatever ... and then don't call or message her again until she does so. Don't hold a torch though.
 
  • #3
Sounds like a fickle mistress. Don't waste your time.
 
  • #4
abiyo said:
I was going out with this awesome girl. After telling her how I liked hanging out with her, she was receptive and that day ended with good notes. A few days after while we were chatting, she told me she is still heart broken and is not ready for a relationship. She mentioned we should be friends. She used to be very eager to hang out with me before she told me this. She became less interested in my messages and chats after that. She still replies to my messages but after a day or so. Given that I text her less now(once in three days or so) just to ask how she is doing. I like this girl but is it wise to be dating someone who is not so sure about me? I am as confused as to what I should do next. any advices from PF community will be appreciated for a noob like me
Well, at least she told you.

If she was in a serious relationship that recently failed, she may not wish to immediately get into another one. She used to be very eager to hang out with you before you told her how you liked hanging out with her. She probably valued you as a friend, partly because there was no commitment [to hang out].

One should give the young lady some space. Dating doesn't seem to be an option at the moment.
 
  • #5
Thank you Simon, Lavabug and Astronuc for your advices. I agree with your explanations.
I have to admit there was some level of desperation and immaturity in my part. Since
it has been a while I have been dating, I had some expectations. But now I have taken a step back and avoided messaging her in the past few days. I will keep this to for future, remain as a friend and reply when she contacts me only. Thank you once again, what I needed was a confirmation that I should move on.
 

FAQ: Should I continue dating a heartbroken girl?

1. How do I approach a heart broken girl for dating?

Approaching a heart broken girl for dating can be tricky. It's important to be respectful and understanding of her feelings. Start by showing genuine interest in getting to know her and listen to her story. Be patient and give her space to heal before making any moves.

2. How can I help a heart broken girl open up to me?

Opening up to someone new can be difficult for a heart broken girl. The best way to help her open up is to create a safe and supportive environment. Listen to her without judgment, validate her feelings, and be patient. Let her know that you are there for her and that she can trust you.

3. Should I be cautious when dating a heart broken girl?

Yes, it's important to be cautious when dating a heart broken girl. She may have trust issues and may need extra time and support to open up and trust again. Be understanding of her boundaries and communicate openly and honestly with her.

4. How can I make a heart broken girl feel better?

There is no one-size-fits-all solution for making a heart broken girl feel better. The best thing you can do is to be there for her, listen to her, and offer support and understanding. Show her love and kindness, but also respect her need for space and time to heal.

5. Is it possible to have a successful relationship with a heart broken girl?

Yes, it is possible to have a successful relationship with a heart broken girl. It may take extra effort and patience, but with open communication, understanding, and support, a heart broken girl can learn to trust and love again. Remember to be patient and understanding of her feelings and boundaries.

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