The Science of Love: Exploring the Evolutionary Origins of Human Desire

[N_Quire]

I have often said "I love you", to children, people I desire, my parents, even aunts and uncles and one or two friends. But what is love? Does it mean I like you a lot and/or I want you a lot? Will someone tell me what love is; I don't mind the explanation being evolutionary and scientific.

 

[grady]

A biblical description of love is in 1 Corinthians 13.

 

[Greg Bernhardt]

I've read articles that breakdown love into chemicals and even what chemicals are responsible for the differemt stages of love. However, don't tell your bf/gf that the reason you love them is because of some chemicals in your body.

 

[Kerrie]

maybe it's the other way around, love induces those chemicals...

 

[LURCH]

This is going to sound terribly unromantic, so let me preface it by saying that I am a terribly romantic guy (or is it a romantically terrible guy?). I understand about the chemicals, the dopamine and the serotonin, and the endorphins and all that. I understand the emotional excitement or sentimentality most commonly associated with a "love" relationship. And, I am heavily in favor of all that stuff. But I feel that I must state, most emphatically, that is not love.

Love is a choice. It carries with it a certain connotation of priority. For example, a thing that is loved will be given preferential treatment over an unloved thing. If you love a person, you will give that person's wants and needs a higher priority than your own.

This, I believe, marks the difference between the romance which modern Western culture often refers to as "love", and true love of the sort referred to in the wedding vows. In today's society, one will often hear the claim "I love him, I can't help it!", or "there's nothing I can do; I have simply stopped loving her." In my opinion, these are examples of misusing the word "love" in reference to a feeling (over which we have no control). This cannot be the sort of love found in the wedding vows, in which billions of couples throughout millennia have promised to love, honor, etc. If love were a set of biochemical impulses, or transient emotional states, over which we have no control, we obviously could not promise it.

 

[The Grimmus]

yea but i think it would still be cool to say, "OH baby the first time i detected your feramones i have had the unstopable natural urge to reproduce our race"

 

[N_Quire]

The Grimmus, I tried that line. I got slapped.

 

[eNtRopY]

Originally posted by N_Quire
what is love?

Baby don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
No more.

eNtRopY

 

[Entropia]

im still trying to figure out what love *is*.
i know obsession. i know passion. so, what is the relationship between obsession, passion and "Love"?

so, the "best" i have been able to honestly say is:

"i love you for lack of a better word."


and yeah, I've suffered certain consequences for saying that.

 

[damgo]

..got to do, got to do with it?

It's an ill-defined term, people use it to mean so many different thinks. Romantic love... hmmm... it's sort of a primitive. Like pornography, you can't define it but you just know it when you see it.

 

[Dj Sneaky Whiskers]

Love is...two naked eight year olds who are married. After making such a statement, I truly hope everyone recognises the reference.

 

[Daminc]

For those whos light bulb remains dim:

http://www.comicspage.com/loveis/

 

[Daminc]

Perhaps Love has a lot to do with instinct.

Our instincts protect us from harm and alert us to circumstances that we haven't perceived.

Perhaps our instincts alert us to a compatability to another person and tries to bribe our conscious self into bonding with that match by releasing those chemicals?

 

[The Grimmus]

no wait love is that thing you do to the funny dressed lady on the corner afetr seh steals your walet and asks you funny questions

 

[RuroumiKenshin]

Love is an attachment to something that makes one feel pleased. I'm pretty sure it is due to a mixture of horomonal reactions in the brain. Nothing else. It is an advanced state of attachment. For example, take a married couple. They have unconditional, eternal affection for one another. Animals, which are inferior to humans do not posess such a sensation. Only two species do, humans and (something, I can't remember what it was called). Overall, love is a strong sense of attachment.

 

[BoulderHead]

"I do understand what love is, and that is one of the reasons I can never again be a Christian. Love is not self denial. Love is not blood and suffering. Love is not murdering your son to appease your own vanity. Love is not hatred or wrath, consigning billions of people to eternal torture because they have offended your ego or disobeyed your rules. Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being."
-Dan Barker

 

[Daminc]

Hear hear

 

[FZ+]

Amen to that!

 

[damgo]

Love consists in this,
that two solitudes protect
and touch
and greet each other.

 

[Sourire]

Originally posted by LURCH


Love is a choice. It carries with it a certain connotation of priority. For example, a thing that is loved will be given preferential treatment over an unloved thing. If you love a person, you will give that person's wants and needs a higher priority than your own.

I have to agree. I can see with that definition that it can be used universally with family, friends and others. I don't really think that it always has to be romantic and between man and woman.

 

[RuroumiKenshin]

Romance has nothing to do with love.Romance is merely a specific kind, so to speak.
What kind of definition are you guys looking for?? A moral one?

 

[nevagil]

luv

When a dog I had for 13 yrs died I cried for days. I musta loved that unique dog. Although I don't know if I would've gave my life for the dogs life so maybe its not love. Do you have to be willing to give your life for it to be true love?

Some old couples that have been married for like 60 yrs and still like each other seem to be the ultimate in what I think love can be?

Its like their infatuation more or less held up a lifetime.

I used to love milkshakes & giant hamburgers but now I'm cured.

Ya know someday chemicals (drugs) will be sold to aid love.


gilnv of www.surrealcity.com

 

[Zero]

Love begins where the urge to kill ends.

 

[Stranger]

this is the most common dialogue about love in Hindi movies..."love begins with hatredness'...

 

[Psyber freek]

Originally posted by BoulderHead
"I do understand what love is, and that is one of the reasons I can never again be a Christian. Love is not self denial. Love is not blood and suffering. Love is not murdering your son to appease your own vanity. Love is not hatred or wrath, consigning billions of people to eternal torture because they have offended your ego or disobeyed your rules. Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission.
-Dan Barker

Love is disciplining those who have done wrong to the extent they deserve. Love is sending your perfect, only child to endure all the evil that has ever existed to give the choice eternal life to all the imperfect humans on the earth. This is the reason why I can not be athiest. There would be no one to love or thank for all the blessings poured upon me and the world.

 

[Zero]

Love is teaching your children about reality, not lies and fairy tales.

 

[Psyber freek]

Love is teaching your children about reality, not lies and fairy tales.

Indeed. Yet the bible doesn't contain lies or fairy tales.

 

[BoulderHead]

Originally posted by Psyber freek
Love is disciplining those who have done wrong to the extent they deserve.

No one deserves an eternity in Hell.

There would be no one to love or thank for all the blessings poured upon me and the world.

I would thank the individuals who enriched my life.

 

[Zero]

Originally posted by Psyber freek
Indeed. Yet the bible doesn't contain lies or fairy tales.

no, it IS lies and fairy tales...someone lied to you!

LOL, never mind, let's not fight.

 

[Another God]

Originally posted by LURCH
Love is a choice. It carries with it a certain connotation of priority. For example, a thing that is loved will be given preferential treatment over an unloved thing. If you love a person, you will give that person's wants and needs a higher priority than your own.

This, I believe, marks the difference between the romance which modern Western culture often refers to as "love", and true love of the sort referred to in the wedding vows. In today's society, one will often hear the claim "I love him, I can't help it!", or "there's nothing I can do; I have simply stopped loving her." In my opinion, these are examples of misusing the word "love" in reference to a feeling (over which we have no control). This cannot be the sort of love found in the wedding vows, in which billions of couples throughout millennia have promised to love, honor, etc. If love were a set of biochemical impulses, or transient emotional states, over which we have no control, we obviously could not promise it.

I do agree Lurch. I think you reaise an incredibly valid point, but I don't know whether what u are talking about is actually 'Love' or not. If it is, then what is that feeling? I mean, we have commitment, and then we have a reason for commiting don't we?

Making that choice to prioritise someone over everything else has to happen for a reason doesn't it? And usually, most people would agree, it is made because of that 'I love him, I can't help it!' feeling...

Perhaps, you are not talking about love, but are actually talking about the 'phenotypic' expression of true love. Unquestioning Dedication...?

 

[Daminc]

Ya know someday chemicals (drugs) will be sold to aid love.

Viagra & MDMA

No one deserves an eternity in Hell.

I don't believe Hell is menioned in the Bible in that context. Hellfire and damnation was made up by those in power (the Church) to persude the masses to join their 'club'

Please read http://www.yeshuatyisrael.com/sheol.htm

I've studied religion in many forms and have my own ideas but I don't profess that I'm right. What I do know is what many people believe is right are propbably wrong

no, it IS lies and fairy tales...someone lied to you!

Be careful...all myths have an origin it's just that they tend to get more and more distorted over time. Still, it would be an interesting debate sometime

 

[Alex00]

Whales?
Crabs?

 

[BoulderHead]

I don't believe Hell is menioned in the Bible in that context. Hellfire and damnation was made up by those in power (the Church) to persude the masses to join their 'club'

I think that an absence of an everlasting damnation would be fine, but what think you of this;

http://www.biblehelp.org/hell.htm?source=overture

 

[Daminc]

I feel sorry for those people who live in fear of 'going to hell for eternity'

Here's an interesting quote:

The term "Gehenna", also translated "hell" occurs twelve times in the New Testament, and every quote is by Jesus Christ. Six of the twelve references to Gehenna mention fire as one of its characteristics. Southeast of Jerusalem was the Valley of the Son of Hinnom. During Old Testament times, children were offered to the false god Moloch in this valley, and later Jews used this valley to dispose of their rubbish, as well as the bodies of dead animals and unburied criminals. To consume all this, a fire was kept burning continuously, and gnawing worms abounded. It was a vile place. The Jews of Jesus' day certainly had a vivid picture of what being thrown alive into Gehenna would mean for them.

 

[Another God]

ahem... love people. We're talking about 'love'... not hell.