Can Men Really Say These Things to Women?

[tribdog]

Best pick up line for me:
"I've been sitting over there with my little brother and his friends and they've been discussing all night how much they want to talk to you, but none of them have the guts to come over here"
I dated him for 18 months.

and he dated her for 24

 

[ShawnD]

One that works is "aren't you one of my brother's friends?"

 

[tribdog]

She's a hard woman to get over

 

[ShawnD]

Sorry for removing the harsh insult. Now your post doesn't make any sense.

 

[franznietzsche]

i love it when you talk dirty to me baby!

Filthy filthy nerd. I'll show you nerdy.

 

[tribdog]

Sorry for removing the harsh insult. Now your post doesn't make any sense.

if I let that bother me I'd never get anything written

 

[franznietzsche]

if I let that bother me I'd never get anything written

Or done for that matter. You and your trebuchets. Speaking of which, where is the thread where you torched the frozen soda bottle and melted it to the carpet? I need to explain to some people why you're awesome.

 

[Evo]

Or done for that matter. You and your trebuchets. Speaking of which, where is the thread where you torched the frozen soda bottle and melted it to the carpet? I need to explain to some people why you're awesome.

It's in the General Discussion Classics sticky.

Don't tell me you haven't read Patent # 4,669,216.

 

[franznietzsche]

It's in the General Discussion Classics sticky.
Don't tell me you haven't read Patent # 4,669,216.

 

[Evo]

Read this. https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=21807

There will be a quiz tomorrow.

Patent # 4,669,216

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"High tech mousing that not only kills but crushes and incinerates the victim is offered in a trap devised by Texan Ted M. Moss. His enclosed apparatus lures a doomed rodent into a cylindrical chamber with bait. An electric eye senses the presence of the mouse and actuates a spring driven vertical harpoon that spears the creature on the spot. Once dead, the mouse is crushed between two flat metal plates to a thickness of about three-sixteenths of an inch and incinerated by an electric coil. The trap then automatically places another morsel in the bait chamber and resets itself to harpoon the next small intruder."

"The flattened and roasted rodent is then placed on a soft whole wheat tortilla with sundried tomatoes, arugala and parmesean cheese. It is served with your choice of medium soft drink. It is the McMousetrap mousewrap. Available for a limited time only.

Njorl

 

[Ivan Seeking]

"No thanks, I'm gay."

Well, I never tried that one, but I'd bet that doesn't work very well.

I was house-sitting for a friend and stopped by to check the house with a new girl friend. We went inside and in jest, without even imagining that she would take me seriously, I said, "I'll be right back. Don't steal anything while I'm gone". I know...what was I thinking! Anyway, we dated for a long time, but I only found out a year or so later that she nearly walked out right then and there. It never even crossed my mind until she told me!

 

[bomba923]

"i wish i could differentiate your function baby, so then i could lie tangent to your curves"
thats my favorite thing that any guy has EVER said to me!

Well, it certainly seems nicer ...but a little less straightfoward than:

"HEY! WANNA INTEGRATE MY NATURAL LOG !?? "

 

[The_Professional]

How about what women say to men and what they actually mean:

"Let's just see where it goes" means "It ain't going anywhere"

"No rush" means "It will never happen"

"But I love him" means "He can run me over and I'd say it's an accident"

"I'm tired of mind games" means "The next male body who comes along will definitely get lucky"

"I'm thirtyish" means "My fortieth birthday is tomorrow"

 

[mattmns]

I have an Isomorphism, would you like to see if it's Injective?

Damn, not that good, tribdog could you come up with something good using "Isomorphism" and "Injective" please

 

[tribdog]

no, don't think I can
hey Renoit, can you paint me a masterpiece with these crayolas?
Hey, Emeril. can you cook me a delicious meal with these sticks and this can of dried eels?
hey, Whitney can you burp a hit song?
Hey Frank L. Wright can you build me a skyscraper out of leftover spaghetti?
Even talent only goes so far

 

[Danger]

I did have a guy tell me once that he was going to be the first President of the United States and he wanted me to be his First Lady. That one actually worked - or shouldn't I mention that?

If that means that you're actually Barbara Bush, then no you shouldn't.

 

[tribdog]

It also means that the guy was George Washington. I wouldn't brag about that.

 

[mattmns]

no, don't think I can
hey Renoit, can you paint me a masterpiece with these crayolas?
Hey, Emeril. can you cook me a delicious meal with these sticks and this can of dried eels?
hey, Whitney can you burp a hit song?
Hey Frank L. Wright can you build me a skyscraper out of leftover spaghetti?
Even talent only goes so far