- #36
homeomorphic
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- 130
But intelligent people know when to keep their mouths shut and how to slowly bring others to their way of thinking.
Being a bit shy, I CAN be pretty good at keeping my mouth shut. As for slowly bringing people to my way of thinking, that's definitely something I'm not good at. I'm not good at influencing people at all.
It's a skill combined with the intelligence of how to work with people.
Yes, I'm not going to lie. I suck at working with people. There's only so much I can do about that. I'm easy to get along with, actually. My posts on here might not be very representative because I'm very disgruntled about the state of pedagogy in math, physics, and engineering, and on here, it's hard to control my fury because of that. Mal4mac seems to have gotten a taste of this on that other thread a while back and that's probably why he thinks I'm arrogant, more than this thread. He was talking to a guy who was a lot like me who wanted to understand things more deeply, and he was basically telling him that's the way it is, so I had to set the record straight. Looks like I'm being a know-it-all to him. But he doesn't understand how I've sat in classes, and how upsetting it is when you want to understand it more deeply and the textbook doesn't want to go there, or the prof doesn't want to go there, and they're pulling things out of hats, moving symbols around, and you just know that there's a deeper meaning to it, but they're robbing you of it. In my experience with countless subjects, I am proven right every time that the subject actually makes much more sense than they are letting on. So, I'm not being a know-it-all, trying to show off. I'm trying to address someone's suffering because I identify with it. That's what it's about, not showing off, or trying to win arguments.
Belligerence and spouting off may feel good but it's not the intelligent way to handle situations, it's not going to get you hired.
I don't think I'm really that belligerent. Believe it or not, I keep most of my non-conformist, iconoclastic thoughts to myself, more so in real life. Things are fairly anonymous here, so I'm more open. I give a lot of my opinions that I'd only give in real life if you asked. Who knows, maybe I alienate too many people. But on the other hand, a lot of people can really identify with my views and appreciate what I'm saying. They've told me so.
You need to have sophistication and savvy, as well as intelligence and social skills. From your posts, I find you lacking in all of these areas. You may have book smarts, I don't know, but I can tell you don't have the other crucial elements to succeed.
Yes, I'm pretty bad with people. I do have intelligence, though, I mean, come on. Don't be silly. I'm working on my people skills. But really, I'm so bad, I don't know if there's much hope there. I'm actually not worried about coming off as belligerent or arrogant. That's an artifact of these forums and my particular anger issues when it comes to excessively formal and unenlightening presentations of math and physics. What I really worry about is just utter lack of charm, charisma, conversational skills, that sort of thing.
I don't mean any of this as a put down, but as constructive criticism in hopes that you can change and maybe get a job.
Well, thanks for the honesty, but really, if compromising my principles beyond a certain point is going to be my downfall, I'm prepared to go down. Not that I can't be somewhat strategic about it, but past a certain point, well, as Kurt Cobain said, "It's better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you're not."