How Can I Survive Being Homeless Until I Transfer to University?

[inflector]

PS: Macs suck, if it's worth anything, sell it, buy a cheaper laptop with the same (or superior specs), and spend the $ on something else...also, a lot of programmers won't take a Mac user seriously O_O

Do you know many actual programmers? What could possibly lead you to believe this?

Many serious IT people and programmers use Macs because it runs on Unix and is an excellent OS. The machines are very well built. Much better than a typical Windows machine. If you know Linux then Unix is very easy and vice versa.

The best programmers I know much prefer Unix or Linux machines and most of them use MacBook Pros for their laptop.

I have hired perhaps 50 different programmers over the years and I would never consider having a Mac as a downside. To me, it says you take your computing seriously.

What matters for getting hired is how well you can program and how well you can take directions and work with others.

Trying to get a job programming is a good idea. I worked 30 hours a week during high-school and could have supported myself off the money if I had needed to. It won't hurt you to have a job like this no matter what you end up doing in the future. Offer to do some work at a reduced rate for a week or two in the beginning so that the employer can see what you can do and you might find it easier.

 

[haxtor21]

Yes well that would be wonderfull if i would be at that level. I'm just starting out really. My school pre-occupies most of my time, and I am more of a computer hardware enthusiast, but I realized software is much more interesting and important. Thus I am picking up Java right now and C/++ in the near future; hopefully.

So you had a programming job while in HS? When did u start coding?

 

[General_Sax]

why don't you just get another job and try and move back in with your mom?

say you're sorry and stuff.

P.S. I didn't read the thread

 

[inflector]

Yes well that would be wonderfull if i would be at that level. I'm just starting out really. My school pre-occupies most of my time, and I am more of a computer hardware enthusiast, but I realized software is much more interesting and important. Thus I am picking up Java right now and C/++ in the near future; hopefully.

So you had a programming job while in HS? When did u start coding?

I didn't even really know how to program when I got my first job. I had just read some programming manuals and didn't even have a computer at home. At first I did grunt work, translating some Basic language code from one computer to another. I just looked up the different commands in the two different OS books and got things to work.

I kept that job for 3 years and it helped me immensely with my career from that point onward.

 

[bp_psy]

Eastern Europeans are somewhat stricter than Western Europeans. Far more traditional in their views.

I am actually also a Romanian that emigrated to Canada with my family in my late teens. It may be that some parents are more strict than others but in my experience the connection and support that one can expect from eastern European parents is greater than what is expected in north America.From my own experience and what I saw at my friends (Hungarians,Bulgarians. Ukrainians)parents usually do not expect to leave their home as soon as is the custom here. We usually try to leave as soon as possible but we are not expected to leave before 20-25.I am not telling that this always the case but in general eastern European families are close.

Returning to the op. From what I read in his posts and from what I know about the mentality of Romanian emigrants that left "for the children" ,I think what happened is that this kid was spoiled to much and now has developed an attitude this may be accentuated by the the fact that his father is not around.His mother probably had enough and tries to teach him a lesson.Considering that the guy thinks that he can live on the streets with the money that he made as a lifeguard he will be begging his mother to let him sleep on the floor in a week.

 

[jbunniii]

You should go directly to a mortgage broker, take out a subprime loan to buy a house, and immediately do a cash-out refinance to 110% of the house value, which should give you 10% of the purchase in cash to play with. The more expensive the house, the more you will pocket. Don't worry about your ability to repay the mortgage, you can always refinance if things get tough. This will always be possible because house prices always go up, at approximately 20% per year. And if they ever fall for any reason, you can just default and live rent-free for 2 years or longer until the bank finally gets around to foreclosing.

Sorry, was channeling 2006 for a minute there. Except for the last sentence, which is very 2010.

 

[haxtor21]

he will be begging his mother to let him sleep on the floor in a week.

I don't think so.

 

[haxtor21]

You should go directly to a mortgage broker, take out a subprime loan to buy a house, and immediately do a cash-out refinance to 110% of the house value, which should give you 10% of the purchase in cash to play with. The more expensive the house, the more you will pocket. Don't worry about your ability to repay the mortgage, you can always refinance if things get tough. This will always be possible because house prices always go up, at approximately 20% per year. And if they ever fall for any reason, you can just default and live rent-free for 2 years or longer until the bank finally gets around to foreclosing.

Sorry, was channeling 2006 for a minute there. Except for the last sentence, which is very 2010.

You must be joking right? it went 2 miles over my head.

I was considering living with a roommate if my car gets un-bearable, but this kind of risk really isn't for me right now.

 

[Acuben]

*there was problem with connection so If i double posted...excuse me.

First of all, knowing your citizenship status probably would help us out more. If you have green card or citizenship, nor both makes a huge difference on your strategies- In terms of financial helps or government loans you can get.

In my opinion, you should try anything possible to move back with your mom. This should be your primary concern. Not just for current "survival" but for the long run.
It seems like it's more of a relationship between you and your mother.

but, if you have to live by yourself...
If you haven't transferred yet, working part time and studying part time isn't bad.

either way if you are really tight on budget, consider your health the most important more than anything. If you have to spend money to stay health (by eating healthy, or sleeping in warm places).
It might sound odd to use more money on health while one is one very tight budget, but it is necessary because those living as homeless or tight budgets are more vulnerable to weakening of health. Sleeping in car is fine, but if possible I would try to get a room even if I have to spend the precious money.

 

[haxtor21]

*there was problem with connection so If i double posted...excuse me.

First of all, knowing your citizenship status probably would help us out more. If you have green card or citizenship, nor both makes a huge difference on your strategies- In terms of financial helps or government loans you can get.
Permanent resident
In my opinion, you should try anything possible to move back with your mom. This should be your primary concern. Not just for current "survival" but for the long run.
It seems like it's more of a relationship between you and your mother.
I am scheduled to move out onthe 31st.

but, if you have to live by yourself...
If you haven't transferred yet, working part time and studying part time isn't bad.
right, well at the moment i have full time college and half time High School. The last think i want is to screw up my only hope for a transfer... my community college GPA.

either way if you are really tight on budget, consider your health the most important more than anything. If you have to spend money to stay health (by eating healthy, or sleeping in warm places).
I am considering moving with a roomate for the following winter months. Nov-Dec-Jan maybe.
It might sound odd to use more money on health while one is one very tight budget, but it is necessary because those living as homeless or tight budgets are more vulnerable to weakening of health. Sleeping in car is fine, but if possible I would try to get a room even if I have to spend the precious money.
I agree with you but at this point nerves are starting to rack up, and I have a calc 2 test coming up, and I need to ace it. I really need to keep my gpa and pull off this winter somehow. I hope ill be fine, or my mom will change her mind.

4char

 

[mugaliens]

I know a guy who lived out of his car for two of his four years at Virginia Tech.

He made it.

With a 4.0, an academic scholarship is a cinch. That doesn't mean you'll have a dime for extras, even if room amd board are included, so you'll probably still have to get a part-time job.

Everyone in the world has some kind of burden. It's not the burden you bear, but the way you carry it.

Good luck. :)

 

[Upisoft]

You mean he should be kicked out and left to fend for himself with only $1000 (granted it's more than most) and a car.

This is not how it should be. Not by a long shot.

The sad part is that it has taken this action by his mother to make him face reality.

He left his job despite the wish of his mother. He is 18 years old. Doing so is signaling that he is ready to take the responsibilities of his decisions and he wants to be free. He got the freedom he wanted. It may sound harsh, but it isn't. Freedom always comes with hardship.

 

[Gaius Baltar]

He left his job despite the wish of his mother. He is 18 years old. Doing so is signaling that he is ready to take the responsibilities of his decisions and he wants to be free. He got the freedom he wanted. It may sound harsh, but it isn't. Freedom always comes with hardship.

The above post clearly justifies throwing out your son on the streets. He is 18 years old, he must be very mature, and understand what he is doing completely. WRONG. Throwing out your son over quitting his job? Give me a break.

All I can say is, I'm glad I didnt have you as a parent.

 

[Upisoft]

The above post clearly justifies throwing out your son on the streets. He is 18 years old, he must be very mature, and understand what he is doing completely. WRONG. Throwing out your son over quitting his job? Give me a break.

All I can say is, I'm glad I didnt have you as a parent.

Why it is wrong to give freedom to someone who wants it?

 

[Gaius Baltar]

Thats hardly freedom, that's kicking your son out onto the streets with no where to go, where are the morale values here?

 

[drankin]

He left his job despite the wish of his mother. He is 18 years old. Doing so is signaling that he is ready to take the responsibilities of his decisions and he wants to be free. He got the freedom he wanted. It may sound harsh, but it isn't. Freedom always comes with hardship.

I agree, his mom has standards and if he is going to live off her then he needs to respect her conditions. If he doesn't like it, he can get his own place. Come one, he's 18! Don't be a mommas boy.

Edit: I got camping gear for my 18th bday. LOL

 

[Upisoft]

It is not kicking. It's ending dependency.He got what he wanted.

 

[Upisoft]

I agree, his mom has standards and if he is going to live off her then he needs to respect her conditions. If he doesn't like it, he can get his own place. Come one, he's 18! Don't be a mommas boy.

Edit: I got camping gear for my 18th bday. LOL

I disagree, he is not mommas boy. If he was, there would be no request from her that he get some responsibility within the family by having a job.

 

[alt]

I am considering cleaning the appt tommorow real well and offering my mom my FAFSA money... ~4000. She will probably refuse but its worth a shot.

I will be having more then just my car and 1000$. I have some money in my paypal account, i have a 1400$ laptop, i have a few LCDs, iTouch, etc. I can sell this stuff if necessary.

I am considering ordering a dell laptop and selling my MBP if this is going to happen. Should I do it now or should I wait a bit?.

My mom wanted to give me a better future in the USA. And I can see why she left and sacriiced for me, but at this point I kind of wish I came here now, when I am 18.

I don't think your mother really wants to throw you out. But sometimes, a parent has to take it to the edge to make the point with a head strong and foolish teenager, which you seem to be.

She's achieved much. You've achieved little. She had abundant experience in the world. You have little.

Listen to your mother. Get a job. Grow UP !

 

[JaredJames]

The above post clearly justifies throwing out your son on the streets. He is 18 years old, he must be very mature, and understand what he is doing completely. WRONG. Throwing out your son over quitting his job? Give me a break.

All I can say is, I'm glad I didnt have you as a parent.

Please note there are far more issues than just this, you can either read through the rest of my posts in which I outline them or you can read the OP's other threads where I sourced them.

In response to people regarding freedom:

The OP has expressed clearly that he wants to quit his job and school (temporarily) in order to pursue ventures in programming. I won't go into the details now, see all previous posts by myself. Suffice to say, he is expecting to gain a large degree of freedom, but still wants to live off his mother (as you all point out, he's a big boy now - 18). He has a thousand dollars and believes he can live off that for 6/7 months with no more than a car and laptop.

From what the OP has said here, the mother simply wants him to have a job to support himself (it doesn't seem the mother wants any money from him) and to remain in school and eventually (next year) work to get a degree. This is a very rational viewpoint. The fact the OP has seriously entertained the notion of becoming a big time apps developer within a few weeks;

the idea behind the appstore venture I was planning is the following: If I could learn how to do apps in a relatively short amount of time, come up with a app ideea that people need, develop it and implement it and hopefully become succesfull and continue my schooling with this funding without worry.

with no prior knowledge of the field, and thinks $1000 is enough to sustain himself for a year (thrown out or not) shows you exactly how immature he actually is.

 

[rootX]

He left his job despite the wish of his mother. He is 18 years old. Doing so is signaling that he is ready to take the responsibilities of his decisions and he wants to be free. He got the freedom he wanted. It may sound harsh, but it isn't. Freedom always comes with hardship.

Things like relationships, respect, stability are as important as freedom. 18 is not an indicative of maturity. Some people mature earlier, some later.

 

[Upisoft]

Things like relationships, respect, stability are as important as freedom. 18 is not an indicative of maturity. Some people mature earlier, some later.

The boy seems to think high of his mother. She is the one who knows if he is ready. Apparently she thinks that the little bird may fly out of the nest. Anyway he is old enough to learn what responsibility means. And it seems he does not want to learn it in the family. What do you expect? That she will be responsible for him forever? He must learn that there are consequences of our actions.

 

[JaredJames]

She is the one who knows if he is ready.

Why do you think she believes he is ready? She is doing this because of his attitude. His posts in this thread and others show that he isn't making mature, rational decisions. This is her way of giving him a wake up call.

Apparently she thinks that the little bird may fly out of the nest. Anyway he is old enough to learn what responsibility means. And it seems he does not want to learn it in the family. What do you expect? That she will be responsible for him forever?

Have you read the rest of this thread? He has taken steps which are irrational and don't make sense. He has proven continuously that he doesn't grasp what it takes to get on in the real world.

He needs to remain living with her, he needs safety and security. His only other option is to get a (full time) job and then get his own place. Something I don't think he wants to do, or can do effectively with the amount of schooling he is doing.
She isn't try to take responsibility for him, she is trying to get him to have the best chance possible, something his choices aren't helping with and could possibly harm his future potential.

He must learn that there are consequences of our actions.

I agree.

 

[Upisoft]

Why do you think she believes he is ready? She is doing this because of his attitude. His posts in this thread and others show that he isn't making mature, rational decisions. This is her way of giving him a wake up call.

Have you read the rest of this thread? He has taken steps which are irrational and don't make sense. He has proven continuously that he doesn't grasp what it takes to get on in the real world.

Yes, I have read the rest and I agree that he is being irrational. Also I agree that he fails to understand the severity of the situation he is in. I don't believe that his mother is not aware of this. Someone called her actions stupid and the boy defended his mother. That action alone tells me a lot about her. She knows what she is doing and the boy needs this cold shower.

He needs to remain living with her, he needs safety and security.

Isn't he in US where there is no more crime, as someone was good enough to tell me(in another thread)?

 

[JaredJames]

Yes, I have read the rest and I agree that he is being irrational. Also I agree that he fails to understand the severity of the situation he is in. I don't believe that his mother is not aware of this. Someone called her actions stupid and the boy defended his mother. That action alone tells me a lot about her. She knows what she is doing and the boy needs this cold shower.

Completely agree.

Isn't he in US where there is no more crime, as someone was good enough to tell me(in another thread)?

Huh? Who the hell would say that? That is one of the most ridiculous statements I've heard in a while. Unbelievable to a rather horrific extent.

 

[Evo]

Huh? Who the hell would say that? That is one of the most ridiculous statements I've heard in a while. Unbelievable to a rather horrific extent.

He's probably misleadingly referring to my post saying that outside of large cities, the majority of the US is relatively safe. Being put in a potentially dangerous situation, like being homeless, obviously increases the chances of being victimized. It's not like you're inside your home in a safe neighborhood. And the OP is in Michigan, a state with very high unemployment and a rather high crime rate, especially the closer you get to a large city.

Also, giving a teenager that has never lived outside his home a 2 week notice to get out is a stupid and reckless decision, no matter how arrogant or clueless the parent might consider the kid might be. If she's to the point where she has lost all hope in him, then she should give him a realistic time frame to get a place. He doesn't have any way to rent a place, winter is coming, Michigan has deadly cold temperatures in the winter, he won't survive in his car, what is he supposed to do?

 

[Upisoft]

He's probably misleadingly referring to my post saying that outside of large cities, the majority of the US is relatively safe. Being put in a potentially dangerous situation, like being homeless, obviously increases the chances of being victimized. It's not like you're inside your home in a safe neighborhood. And the OP is in Michigan, a state with very high unemployment and a rather high crime rate, especially the closer you get to a large city.

I don't believe it was you who sent a link to a video claiming that high crime rate in US is a myth. It is strange how fast one's myths can become reality to someone else.

Also, giving a teenager that has never lived outside his home a 2 week notice to get out is a stupid and reckless decision, no matter how arrogant or clueless the parent might consider the kid might be. If she's to the point where she has lost all hope in him, then she should give him a realistic time frame to get a place. He doesn't have any way to rent a place, winter is coming, Michigan has deadly cold temperatures in the winter, he won't survive in his car, what is he supposed to do?

He is no longer kid. Let's say he have decided to do something much more stupid, crime perhaps. Who will be responsible, he or his mother? Don't you agree that protecting him(taking the responsibility herself) is the stupid thing to do in this case?

Now, leaving a job is not a crime, but it has consequences. If she leaves her job they will be both outside without place to live in no time. He decided to leave his job and he is facing the same consequences.

 

[JaredJames]

He's probably misleadingly referring to my post saying that outside of large cities, the majority of the US is relatively safe. Being put in a potentially dangerous situation, like being homeless, obviously increases the chances of being victimized. It's not like you're inside your home in a safe neighborhood. And the OP is in Michigan, a state with very high unemployment and a rather high crime rate, especially the closer you get to a large city.

Ah got you, a bit naughty there then with that reference upi.

Also, giving a teenager that has never lived outside his home a 2 week notice to get out is a stupid and reckless decision, no matter how arrogant or clueless the parent might consider the kid might be. If she's to the point where she has lost all hope in him, then she should give him a realistic time frame to get a place. He doesn't have any way to rent a place, winter is coming, Michigan has deadly cold temperatures in the winter, he won't survive in his car, what is he supposed to do?

I completely agree, no parent should ever throw their kids out in such an anger motivated way.
If she really wants him gone, she should give him time to get a place (a reasonable amount of time). The reason I keep on about his attitude is because he needs it drilled into him that the world isn't some easy going place. He's taking things far too relaxed.

I think it's become clear that his attitude is a problem. But instead of trying to offer his mother money to stay, he really needs to change his ways and show her he is trying his best to succeed. Which seems to be what she wants.

EDIT: For the record, I am against this woman throwing her son out, however I think he also needs to understand the reasons why she wants to do so. His attempted solutions so far seem to have culminated into him offering to get a job and pay his mother every penny from it to stay. This doesn't solve the problems between him and his mother.
I'm also curious how long this has been going on for. Is this something that has been brewing over some time and the OP has failed to recognise it? He says she phoned him and asked if he went to work, he said he quit and then she asked him to move out. This just doesn't sound right to me, just like the OP didn't. A missing detail perhaps.
The key for the OP is to recognise what his mother is angry at and then deal with it. Not try to go through with it under a false belief it will all be ok and certainly not to try and bribe his mother.