Managing Stress: Tips and Strategies for a Healthier Mind and Body

[Ivan Seeking]

I'm sorry to hear about your health problems, mathwonk.

 

[mathwonk]

Thank you. I'd noticed over the years a lot of people have health problems, but I still assumed my family would not have any. Considering the large number of these among my friends, at ages much younger than our parents, I am wondering if our environment, food, water, air, is failing us. Perhaps it is foolish to poison it wholesale after all. Nonetheless our leaders seem still committed to taking bribes to allow the destruction of the earth.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I think the day for change has come. There is a distinct shift in popular thinking that I've been noticing, especially since 911, so I find myself feeling very hopeful; not for me of course, I'm old , but for the kids.

The questions are how much, and how soon?

 

[Schrodinger's Dog]

call in sick to work

I'm not sure who you directed this at but...

I'm on a final warning for time off sick due to asthma, your immune system tends to go to pot too, so I get asthma, luckily only in the winter and only when it's cold, and what do you know it's very warm this year.

Not a good idea

EDIT: you are not going to believe this but...I can't work today as all the trains are canceled from my station and in the direction I need to go. ironic or what.

 

[mathwonk]

school was canceled at uga today too for weather but i am never sure why.

when i was a grad student at brandeis one winter it snowed heavily and i bundled up and walked and hitch hiked the 14 miles to brandeis from cambridge only to find school was closed so the stduents would not have to walk to class from their dorms?

or maybe i drove my old vw bug - they are really good snow cars.

 

[Moonbear]

Hmm...I never considered things like grading to be stressful. Boring, yeah, but not stressful. Meetings aren't stressful either...they're a nice break when I can sit down and not be bugged. The excuses are annoying, but they're only stressful if you listen to them...or at least the whiney, baseless ones. Actually, in general, teaching is my stress relief. It's something that's just fun to do. It's writing the grant proposals and trying to jump the hoops through the university administration to get all the signatures required by the artificial internal deadlines to get them in by the real deadline knowing full well what a slim chance there is of getting funding after all that effort that's stressful to me. Fortunately, I have a dept chair who understands reality and assumes no grant will get funded on the first try (so it's a treat if it does), which takes off some of that pressure. And, then I enjoy the part of sitting down and focusing on very little else other than coming up with new experiments. So, it all balances out. I think, overall, it's hard to get stressed when you love your job.

Sorry to hear about your health troubles, though, mathwonk. Dealing with cancer, especially when it's both you and your wife at the same time, is definitely stressful...and downright scary.

 

[mathwonk]

im not scared of dying, only of not being able to fulfill my responsibilities. but my kids are raised, and my house is almost paid for.

still going through the "cure" process is stressful. my wifes chemo is over and if I am lucky ill avoid chemo myself. that will be nice.

ive noticed that i much prefer a life threatening disease that does not hurt, to a debilitating disability. when i was in a wheelchair a few years back, i felt very depressed, but having cancer and being able to walk is ok. i feel more productive, but it does weigh on my mind.

its kind of weird to think of leaving here before learning all the beautiful math that's out there, and solving few more problems, and writing up the rest of my notes. and learning classical guitar, and learning to speak a few more languages, and watch my kids grow up.

it gives you a certain freedom from procrastination though. like we are definitely going back to hawaii this summer. no reason to wait. i am also trying to be less impatient with people here and elsewhere, i.e. what's the point?.

 

[Monique]

I think, overall, it's hard to get stressed when you love your job.

Not when the work becomes very demanding, like getting primary cellines that are the most important thing in the world and having anxiety/stress that something will go wrong and you can't get them back. Added stress is having a million other things that need to be done first. So, actually, loving your job creates the stress: otherwise you just wouldn't care

I recently saw a show by Ray Meares on Discovery Channel about survival in the wild and what make a person a surviver (everyone is a potential victim, not everyone is a potential surviver). It struck me what he said: a surviver tackles his survival with little tasks and doesn't see survival as a single large task. A victim sees survival as a single large task, is overwhelmed by it and just gives up.

That helped me with my everyday work, I just take a deep breath and look what needs to be done first and make a list of tasks that still need to be done. Going through the list and crossing everything out that has been done really is a stress reliever

 

[radou]

Considering the large number of these among my friends, at ages much younger than our parents, I am wondering if our environment, food, water, air, is failing us. Perhaps it is foolish to poison it wholesale after all. Nonetheless our leaders seem still committed to taking bribes to allow the destruction of the earth.

Mathwonk, as anyone else here, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for your and your wife's health. Speaking of the quoted thought above, I agree, and, as a matter of fact, I'm even scared to think about it.

 

[Moonbear]

Not when the work becomes very demanding, like getting primary cellines that are the most important thing in the world and having anxiety/stress that something will go wrong and you can't get them back. Added stress is having a million other things that need to be done first. So, actually, loving your job creates the stress: otherwise you just wouldn't care

I appreciate that point, that you have to care about something to get stressed over it. Though, I guess I was thinking more along the lines of keeping the stress from getting overwhelming. There are things you worry about, and things that go wrong, but there are also enough rewarding parts of the job that compensate for it and keep the anxiety from crippling you. Part of it is also learning to let go and accepting that things WILL go wrong, and you'll just deal with it as it happens rather than worry about it before it happens. Be as careful as you can be, but if you're at home and should be relaxing/sleeping, there is nothing you can do about those cells in the lab, and if something goes wrong overnight, worrying about it all night won't make it any easier to deal with it when you arrive in the morning. You just

Incidentally, it's interesting you mention the anxiety part of it. We were discussing a paper on stress in journal club yesterday, and the point was raised about both anxiety and depression being related to "stress." Apparently, there's an RFA currently out for proposals to study the relationship between anxiety and depression with stress. The issue also was raised about food intake and stress...the idea that some people will eat when stressed and others become anorexic during stress.

And something really interesting I learned during the journal club is that a number of groups are now proposing that habituation to stressors (after you see the same stressor many times, no longer reacting to it as a stress once you realize no real harm comes of it...something that people with PTSD can't do) may be related to learning/memory. In other words, you have to learn that the experience isn't life threatening, and that each time it happens it will go away again too, in order to adapt and not be stressed every time that happens. Sort of the difference between grad students getting stressed out by their experiment not working, and their faculty mentor remaining calm and saying, "That's research; go get some rest and try again tomorrow." However, there are a lot of unresolved questions related to that. First, is it really that an impairment of learning impairs habituation to stress, or is it that a strong stressor (or an overreaction to stressors) impairs learning (i.e., which is the cause and which is the effect). And, if there is an impairment in learning, is it a specific type of learning?

We used to say to each other when I was in grad school, "Stress makes you stupid." We were pretty aware that it was really hard to remember stuff and commit it to long-term memory if you were trying to learn it while stressed (you might be able to cram enough to remember short term for an exam, but you wouldn't retain it long).

 

[Monique]

I appreciate that point, that you have to care about something to get stressed over it. Though, I guess I was thinking more along the lines of keeping the stress from getting overwhelming.

I guess that is true in terms of depression, when you like the job you are not in an endless situation and are more likely to look at the bright side.

Part of it is also learning to let go and accepting that things WILL go wrong, and you'll just deal with it as it happens rather than worry about it before it happens. Be as careful as you can be, but if you're at home and should be relaxing/sleeping, there is nothing you can do about those cells in the lab, and if something goes wrong overnight, worrying about it all night won't make it any easier to deal with it when you arrive in the morning.

You can worry about a lot of things that will loom over you, which goes beyond a single experiment. I don't know anyone who has received special primary celllines, but I'd like to know what kind of stress they feel over it. Actually losing the line would be a disaster.

Incidentally, it's interesting you mention the anxiety part of it. We were discussing a paper on stress in journal club yesterday, and the point was raised about both anxiety and depression being related to "stress." Apparently, there's an RFA currently out for proposals to study the relationship between anxiety and depression with stress. The issue also was raised about food intake and stress...the idea that some people will eat when stressed and others become anorexic during stress.

That seems very straight-forward to me. The stress-anxiety-depression connection and eating/not-eating connection. I know I eat less under stress.

Sort of the difference between grad students getting stressed out by their experiment not working, and their faculty mentor remaining calm and saying, "That's research; go get some rest and try again tomorrow."

That also works the other way around though, that the professor knows that you need to get stressed and relays that to the student

 

[mathwonk]

thanks for the good wishes radou and everyone else. i was hoping for a good biopsy result next week, and thinking of invoking a modified tinkerbelle cure from the disney site, like maybe everyone would put one hand under the opposite armpit and flap real hard, but now I am beginnig to feel calm about any result. I'll deal with chemo if that's the verdict. now I am cool. thanks.
best regards.

 

[mathwonk]

Having a health problem i can't cure by just exercising or eating right also helps me reflect less stressfully on things, oddly enough. Niow when grading I am more likely to say, oh well, if they didn't get it this time, they'll get it next time.

I always wanted all my students to get everything, and the reality was very stressful. If I explained something several times over, and still the test answers were all over the map, I wanted to jump out the window. Now I am beginning to realize it is a long process, you jiust keep plugging away, and you always get only partial results.

And when I look over while lecturing and someone who emailed me about how hard it was to do the problems is actually sleeping, I just laugh and maybe whistle to wake him up and smile, instead of freaking out.

Or I close the door loudly and say hopefully the sight of a closed door is more boring than this lecture!

AS the Hindu yogis might say, stress is caused by "attachment", i.e. caring too much about the outcome, as remarked above, perhaps by Monique. They recommend in spiritual terms, doing your best, and devoting the outcome to God.

 

[verty]

I always wanted all my students to get everything, and the reality was very stressful. If I explained something several times over, and still the test answers were all over the map, I wanted to jump out the window. Now I am beginning to realize it is a long process, you jiust keep plugging away, and you always get only partial results.

This is quite a general principle. It is the proverbial "slow and steady wins the race" but it actually seems to apply to many things. To effect change, consistency is worth far more than gusto, as I discovered when I decided to start swimming and developed a strong freestyle kick after only 2 months of swimming 3 times a week. Many body builders also contend that quality beats quantity, that one needn't do hundreds of repetitions to effect massive change but should rather follow a consistent plan.

One of the most poignant examples that I have seen occurred when I was quite young and at a camping resort. This coastal caravan park is at the mouth of a river but the river is separated from the sea by about 100-200m of sand-bank. As a result, the water-level in the river is higher than sea-level. Well on this occasion, someone decided to make a furrow with their foot in the sand from the river to the sea. This furrow was about 3 inches deep and 3 inches wide, very little water trickled through.

To my great surprise, that trickle of water which at its start would have taken nearly a minute to fill a glass became over a few hours a steady stream, getting bigger and bigger until eventually water was rapidly evacuating the river in a stream about 1 metre deep by about 5 metres wide. Unfortunately, it made a mess of the weekend because an almost drained river is hardly any fun.

Since I started by current job I've been reading books on philosophy and having done that I realize that the same is true about learning. Especially when reading books, a consistent approach to reading seems to be very important. It doesn't really happen that one reads a critical book and gains a chunk of knowledge, or can suddenly lecture on the subject, but rather it seems that even if one doesn't understand the content at the time, over time change seems to happen, and upon looking back one can see how far one has come.

I think it's only when we look back that we can appreciate that we have moved on, but of course one can't look forwards if one is looking backwards, so it should only be occasionally done.

Perhaps the best thing an educator can do for a student is to effect this unnoticed and potentially unappreciated change, so that they might look back in the future and see that they have moved on. I think this is just how these things go.

 

[Moonbear]

I always wanted all my students to get everything, and the reality was very stressful. If I explained something several times over, and still the test answers were all over the map, I wanted to jump out the window. Now I am beginning to realize it is a long process, you jiust keep plugging away, and you always get only partial results.

Not every student will do well in every class. I've learned to focus my efforts on those who desire to improve...not all students do, and are just trying to get through the class to get a requirement out of the way, or biding their time until they get kicked out and their parents can't force them to go to college anymore. The A students make you feel good when you're grading papers, but the B and C students are the ones who really need you to help them. Once in a while, you can get a light to turn on for a D or F student too, but many times they just need more time to mature before they're ready to focus on learning, or just lack sufficient interest in the subject to want to learn it. You'll just frustrate yourself if you expect every student will do well in the class. Help those who you can and celebrate the successes rather than focus on the failures.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Never underestimate the value of that not understood. By definition, if you need it it will come around again. And often the more challenging hurdles are the ones most remembered. To this day I can remember mistakes made on finals and midterms, and you can be sure that I will NEVER make those mistakes again. And like you said Mathwonk, it is a process.

I am reminded of a study done by GE that covered something like 50 years of research and work, and it turned out that on the average, B students were the most successful employees.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

YIKES! Well, thank goodness for the nine. And at least the other sixteen will be able to count out the correct change at Wal Mart.

edit: yes I know...

 

[Moonbear]

Only 1/3 of the class got answers to questions given out in advance? I've had a small handful not get questions like that (either not paying attention in class, or didn't remember to re-read that part of their notes while studying), but that many sounds like there's a serious problem with that class. Are they all alive? Even when teaching freshmen, I haven't seen that dreadful of a result for a question. What year/level is the course you teach? Is it a class that's starting to really challenge those who didn't learn their fundamentals, or is it some non-majors required class that they just don't care about? Have you had another faculty member sit in the class and look at some of the exam questions to see if there's anything about how the material is taught or how the questions are worded that is confusing, or could be improved? I've had other faculty come up to me from time to time to ask me to look over their exam questions to make sure they make sense and mean what they intend them to mean (when you're getting tired of writing questions, sometimes what you think is obvious isn't so obvious to the students).

Then again, first exams in a course can be pretty dreadful. We're usually happy if we get a 60% average on the first exam. That gets their attention and then they usually pull up considerably from there (and the average also improves because the really lost students realize they need to drop out of the course).

 

[Moonbear]

YIKES! Well, thank goodness for the nine. And at least the other sixteen will be able to count out the correct change at Wal Mart.

And the last two?

 

[Cyrus]

Mathwonk, first, best wishes to you and your wife.

Now my 2 cents on what I have noticed about 'good' professors. The number one thing, above all (even being prepared), is that the GOOD professors have a habbit of always commanding respect in the classroom. When they talk, people take notice and listen. If you announced the questions in advance and the score was that low, people are not respecting you when you stand infront of them.

If you have a reputation for being a no-nonsense professor, like my vibrations professor was, people won't try to pull these kinds of things as much.

I had a calculus professor (chinese woman, very strict but very very smart) who was like that as well. If she saw you with another book out she would stop and say, "that looks like a good book"...and then stare at you like you were an idiot.

If I explained something several times over, and still the test answers were all over the map, I wanted to jump out the window.

I think this also indicates a problem on your part in getting the material across. If this is a consistent problem, its not all their fault. If you throw hard material at me, but don't spark my interest, I probably would not be motivated to care either. Help those who want it.

 

[Schrodinger's Dog]

Mathwonk I don't really know you so I hope I can say something positive: I do work in hospital, and so I see a lot of people like you: I'll keep it short: I hope you get over your problem because I've seen too many people who didn't: but luckily in the modern age, more people that did and god luck.

Get well soon.

 

[Cyrus]

Well I may not command much respect, as sometimes I wear a clown nose to class, and make a lot of jokes, so its probably my fault.

Huh? I am not trying to be rude to you... I am just trying to point out something that I have noticed that is common to most, if not all, good professors I have had.

But I do not wish to force people to "learn", as I am not trying to prepare militarily obedient personnel but thinkers, and thinkers should have some discrimination of their own, in my opinion, but what do i know?

I don't see how commanding respect has any effect on discouraging students to be thinkers.

 

[Cyrus]

With all respect Cyrus, it is not your teacher's responsibility to provoke your curiosity, that is what you should bring to the classroom. If you do not wish to learn, you do not deserve to take up space in a university. It is not a kindergarten.

Well, I am not talking about provoking curiosity. I am talking about the type of professor that walks into the class room and everyone in the room knows its 'time for business.' I will tell you from personal experience that I was curious when I took some courses; however, the professors did not command the lecture, and I soon became disinterested and hated the course. I enjoyed reading the book, but I did not like going to lecture. How you teach the course really does matter- a lot. Professionalism, and being strict makes a huge difference in my opinion.

Now, you said its not the job of the teacher to provoke curiosity. Well, if you are a good professor that is EXACTLY what you want to do. Note*- this has NOTHING to do with not wanting to learn-if you don't want to learn don't take the class, as you said. But a great professor will make you want to learn more, wouldn't you agree?


(I'm just giving you the benefit of a students perspective).

If you don’t agree with me, that’s fine. But perhaps others here can tell you what they consider to be good qualities. Maybe they are different than what you expected. If so, hopefully you can adjust your teaching style to accommodate that and see what happens.

 

[grant9076]

im not scared of dying, only of not being able to fulfill my responsibilities. but my kids are raised, and my house is almost paid for.

still going through the "cure" process is stressful. my wifes chemo is over and if I am lucky ill avoid chemo myself. that will be nice.

ive noticed that i much prefer a life threatening disease that does not hurt, to a debilitating disability. when i was in a wheelchair a few years back, i felt very depressed, but having cancer and being able to walk is ok. i feel more productive, but it does weigh on my mind.

its kind of weird to think of leaving here before learning all the beautiful math that's out there, and solving few more problems, and writing up the rest of my notes. and learning classical guitar, and learning to speak a few more languages, and watch my kids grow up.

it gives you a certain freedom from procrastination though. like we are definitely going back to hawaii this summer. no reason to wait. i am also trying to be less impatient with people here and elsewhere, i.e. what's the point?.

My problems are petty by comparison. You are a very brave person and you certainly have my respect.

 

[radou]

I am talking about the type of professor that walks into the class room and everyone in the room knows its 'time for business.'

Essentially, I agree with all you said cyrus, except that the main quality of this (the quoted) type of professor is not always strictness, but rather 'something' they have inside themselves which makes the students pay attention and listen, or perhaps even very interested in the subject.

I had professors who acutually never paid many attention to non-listeners and background-babblers, and everything worked out just fine. It's all relative and depends on many things. I also had a professor who was pretty strict, and actually everyone hated him.

 

[Astronuc]

I always wanted all my students to get everything, and the reality was very stressful. If I explained something several times over, and still the test answers were all over the map, I wanted to jump out the window. Now I am beginning to realize it is a long process, you jiust keep plugging away, and you always get only partial results.

I realized that as one progress up the ladder of higher education, we expect more as the work gets harder. However, people come with a variety of experience and abilities. I enjoyed the students who got it, many it seemed without effort, and there were those who got by, and there were those who floundered. I tried to work with each student as much as possible, and in some cases, the worst students, I would actually encourage them to drop the course and perhaps find another major. The attrition rate in nuclear engineering was about 80-90%. Of 100 freshman students starting, we might be lucky to have 10 +/- surviving to the senior year.

Even with graduate students, I'd encounter some who needed extra help, and I was always available. Being a mentor is an important part of teaching, but it also requires willing students.

And when I look over while lecturing and someone who emailed me about how hard it was to do the problems is actually sleeping, I just laugh and maybe whistle to wake him up and smile, instead of freaking out.

If it was a one time event, I'd let it go, but if it appeared to be ongoing, I'd talk to the student privately. Besides, I've fallen asleep in class myself.

its kind of weird to think of leaving here before learning all the beautiful math that's out there, and solving few more problems, and writing up the rest of my notes. and learning classical guitar, and learning to speak a few more languages, and watch my kids grow up.

Hang in there mathwonk. Do what you can do. Hopefully watching grandkids are in there too!

it gives you a certain freedom from procrastination though. like we are definitely going back to hawaii this summer. no reason to wait.

Don't forget the sunscreen!

 

[mathwonk]

sorry for passing on some of my stress to you cyrus, your points are well taken, it just gets tiring sometimes trying to produce a certain result in someone else that really should come from within.

I guess i make my own stress by focusing more on my failures than my successes.

here e.g. is a comment from one of my fall classes:

"Professor Smith succeeded in making an oftentimes dry subject interesting. He is incredibly intelligent and I hope to be fortunate enough to have him teach me again."

One would think that comment would make one happy. But I tend to ignore that one, and obsess over a negative comment from someone else.

I never seem to get used to comments like these, from two different students evaluating the same course:

student A:
"Dr. ... is a wonderful professor. I feel lucky to have had this man as an instructor. His enthusiasm in education and mathematics is unparalleled in any teacher I've had. I hope to take another class."

student B:

"Comes to class with only a box of chalk and a sponge. No lesson plan at all! Probably one of the worst teachers I've ever had, though he is a very smart man."

I confess to having completely forgotten the first comment and internalized the second.

I mention this for the possible benefit of some of you who are feeling stressed. If like me you are ignoring the roses and smelling only the exhaust fumes, try to give yourself a break!

 

[Cyrus]

"Comes to class with only a box of chalk and a sponge. No lesson plan at all! Probably one of the worst teachers I've ever had, though he is a very smart man."

I am curious, do you give a syllabus at the first day that outlines what will be covered during each day of class? All my professors provide a syllabus on the first day that contains what is covered, the hw, and what day the exams and final exam are (both time and location) on a tentative schedule (though deviations are very rare).

I think given the fact that the student said "he is a very smart man", no one doubts your depth of knowledge (which is a good thing).

I had an electronics professor last semester. He is extremely smart, and we all knew it-but none of us respected him as a professor because he was -*lousy* as a teacher. I've been to his office before and he's a nice guy, but I still think he needs to work on his teaching skills. People simply did not respect him when he stood there to lecture.

 

[mathwonk]

you seem also to be focusing on the negative comment.

but anyway, i give a syllabus with discussion of what will be covered, what are the prerecquiaites, the dates of tests and exams, office hours, phone number, email addresses, advice on how to study,... etc.

but the kicker is - almost no one apparently reads it.

I measured this once by putting at the top, the request that the student email me that very day, so I could have their email address. After 48 hours, i had received only one email, from over 35 syllabi handed out.

I think it is very difficult for serious students like those who post here, to identify with, or sometimes even believe the reality in the average class in many schools in the US.

you also seem to focus on the concept of "respect", which to you seems to mean fear.

People who do not have the wisdom to respect those who have achieved more than they have themselves, and who could help them do so as well, are to be pitied.

 

[verty]

but the kicker is - almost no one apparently reads it.

What is the cause of that; what is the solution? Is there something more that education broadly conceived can do?

 

[mathwonk]

change of subject

Yayy! I got the negative node biopsy from my oncologist today, which puts me in the "good group", only 35% chance of recurrence within 5 years.


On the way out to go to the doctor, a man hit my parked car with his truck. He seemed puzzled how little I cared about it.


Now we too can get back to our real business, arguing passionately over trivial issues of calculus instruction!

best regards to all, and thanks for the beneficial vibes!:!)

 

[radou]

Yayy! I got the negative node biopsy from my oncologist today, which puts me in the "good group", only 35% chance of recurrence within 5 years.


On the way out to go to the doctor, a man hit my parked car with his truck. He seemed puzzled how little I cared about it.


Now we too can get back to our real business, arguing passionately over trivial issues of calculus instruction!

best regards to all, and thanks for the beneficial vibes!:!)

I'm very glad to heart that, mathwonk! Thumbs up!

 

[Astronuc]

Yayy! I got the negative node biopsy from my oncologist today, which puts me in the "good group", only 35% chance of recurrence within 5 years.

That's great news. Celebrate with a bottle of good wine.

On the way out to go to the doctor, a man hit my parked car with his truck. He seemed puzzled how little I cared about it.

Did you tell him you don't sweat the small stuff.

Now we too can get back to our real business, arguing passionately over trivial issues of calculus instruction!

best regards to all, and thanks for the beneficial vibes!:!)

More positive vibes on the way!

 

[mathwonk]

may i suggest a troplong mondot 1998 sir?