Surviving the Worst Case Scenarios: A Scientific Approach

[Moonbear]

So what, you're telling me its NOT safe to jump away from a building in order to land into the dumpster up against the building?

Yep, you'd be a spot on the pavement on the far side of the dumpster if you jumped away from the building (you'd propel yourself right over the dumpster), that is, unless you figure out a way to get those flippers to work for flight. Of course, if the dumpster is empty, or full of broken glass or construction debris, it might not make much difference.

If you're going to jump off a roof into a dumpster, pick one behind a restaurant...it might smell worst, but there'll be lots of squishy stuff in it to cushion your fall. I'm thinking an Italian or Chinese restaurant might be the best...lots of waste pasta and rice sounds much better than all those T-bones and ribs at the steakhouse. (You'd think I might have scored higher with such gems of wisdom as this one. )

 

[Azael]

Survivor
Your survival rate is 77% and your "certain death" rate is 0%.
There are likely only a couple extreme scenarios that you don't know how to handle. You have made very few, if any, fatal choices. Any group of travellers should be very glad to have someone like you along for a trip.

 

[Monique]

I put curled up in a corner because the corner provides some sort of structural strength (or so I hope) and if you're close to the groud I don't think you'd break many bones rather than have the shock travel up your body and then falling to the ground after impact also.

I also put curled up in a corner, that way you can protect your neck from smashing into the ground. It certainly didn't kill me in the test.

Just a few weeks ago I was in an elevator that overshot the ground floor, but there is no basement so I couldn't get out. After a few moments of thinking what I should do, press the open door button to see what was out there, or call for help, the elevator went up and I could get out. That's the second time I was in an elevator that went mad, the other one didn't want to let me get out and went all the way up to the 8th floor and stopped too low so I had to step up to get out

 

[wolram]

Monique

I also put curled up in a corner, that way you can protect your neck from smashing into the ground. It certainly didn't kill me in the test.

How do you know that?

 

[Pengwuino]

Yep, you'd be a spot on the pavement on the far side of the dumpster if you jumped away from the building (you'd propel yourself right over the dumpster), that is, unless you figure out a way to get those flippers to work for flight. Of course, if the dumpster is empty, or full of broken glass or construction debris, it might not make much difference.

If you're going to jump off a roof into a dumpster, pick one behind a restaurant...it might smell worst, but there'll be lots of squishy stuff in it to cushion your fall. I'm thinking an Italian or Chinese restaurant might be the best...lots of waste pasta and rice sounds much better than all those T-bones and ribs at the steakhouse. (You'd think I might have scored higher with such gems of wisdom as this one. )

I wasn't being serious

 

[Aether]

I'm wondering about the "jump when the elevator crashes". If you're in the elevator, how do you know when the exact moment of impact is so you know when to jump? That won't work.

I chose to lie flat on the floor...that way there is more surface area to absorb the impact. Not sure if I was right or not.

I picked the same, i think there was a thread about why jumping would not work.

I put curled up in a corner because the corner provides some sort of structural strength (or so I hope) and if you're close to the groud I don't think you'd break many bones rather than have the shock travel up your body and then falling to the ground after impact also.

I also put curled up in a corner, that way you can protect your neck from smashing into the ground. It certainly didn't kill me in the test.

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/einstein/relativity/" is an animation of Albert Einstein in a freely falling elevator (to the tune of some soothing elevator music). Notice that he's floating...so apparently none of your survival strategies could even be implemented, at least not in this case.

 

[Moonbear]

I wasn't being serious

The grinning smiley at the beginning of my reply was supposed indicate I knew that. :shy:

 

[wolram]

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/einstein/relativity/" is an animation of Albert Einstein in a freely falling elevator (to the tune of some soothing elevator music). Notice that he's floating...so apparently none of your survival strategies could even be implemented, at least not in this case.

As i though the test is a crock.

 

[DaveC426913]

Survivor

Your survival rate is 80% and your "certain death" rate is 0%.
There are likely only a couple extreme scenarios that you don't know how to handle. You have made very few, if any, fatal choices. Any group of travellers should be very glad to have someone like you along for a trip.


Heh, I even beat Andre the Combat Survival Instructor...

I rock.

 

[Pengwuino]

This test is all opinion, booooooo

 

[larkspur]

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/einstein/relativity/" is an animation of Albert Einstein in a freely falling elevator (to the tune of some soothing elevator music). Notice that he's floating...so apparently none of your survival strategies could even be implemented, at least not in this case.

So what was the correct answer?

 

[wolram]

So what was the correct answer?

None, the test is bogus.

 

[Aether]

So what was the correct answer?

I picked "Flatten your body against the floor" because that seemed like the best posture to be into survive excessive g-forces. For the same reason, I also picked "Land relatively flat on your back" for landing in the dumpster. However, "Just stand there and remain calm" seems like the best alternative in hindsight. If your knees aren't locked, then at least some of the shock will be absorbed by your legs and body before your head hits the floor.

http://www.baseops.net/basictraining/airborne1.jpg

 

[Aether]

Was one of the choices on that to stand really relaxed, with knees bent? If so, that's the one I picked (otherwise, that was my answer to something else ...maybe I should flip through the quiz again to remind myself of the questions ). I'd figure you could absorb some of the impact while crumpling to the floor if you were careful not to lock up all your joints, which would otherwise lead to lots of broken bones.

I removed you from my list in post #41. I think this is the right choice, and this posture can be implemented in mid-air as the photo above demonstrates. Nice choice.

 

[wolram]

I picked "Flatten your body against the floor" because that seemed like the best posture to be into survive excessive g-forces. For the same reason, I also picked "Land relatively flat on your back" for landing in the dumpster. However, "Just stand there and remain calm" seems like the best alternative in hindsight. If your knees aren't locked, then at least some of the shock will be absorbed by your legs and body before your head hits the floor.

http://www.baseops.net/basictraining/airborne1.jpg

[/URL]

I still think the test is bogus, an air born trooper would not survive a free fall from three stories (although the test did not specify hight), but then
that very fact makes the test void or at least tonue in cheek.

 

[Moonbear]

I still think the test is bogus, an air born trooper would not survive a free fall from three stories (although the test did not specify hight), but then
that very fact makes the test void or at least tonue in cheek.

Especially considering the answer I gave wasn't an actual choice on the test. I went back and looked, and the closest answer to that was something like, "Just stand there and try to relax." Nothing about bending your knees or anything. I suspect it's based on a lot of urban legend type stuff.

And, yeah, that dumpster question didn't say anything about what's in the dumpster. You might be better off jumping over it than into it, depending on what's in it.

 

[Moonbear]

Aha! I found the site with the answers, and sure enough, the quiz writer left out important details (like that dumpster does need to be filled with something soft, like cardboard boxes).

http://www.worstcasescenarios.com/mainpage.htm

 

[Aether]

This is cool:

...
3. Plug the pads into the connector. The defibrillator will analyze the patient and determine if he needs a shock. Do not touch the patient at this time.

4. If the machine determines that a shock is needed, it will direct you—both audibly and with visual prompts—to press the orange button to deliver a shock. Do not touch the patient after pressing the button. The machine will check to see whether or not the patient needs a second shock and if so will direct you to press the orange button again.

 

[DaveC426913]

Your back is the last place you ever want to land...unless you want to become paralyzed.

No, your head is the last place you ever want to land - unless you want to become dead.

 

[DaveC426913]

Lying down in the elevator gives you the best chance to survive.

Trust me. I am the survivalist, just look at my score.

Jumping at the last moment was debunked by those champions of rigorous scientific proof The Mythbusters.

 

[wolram]

From MoonBs link, was this ans in the opptions?

. Do not attempt to remove a leech by pulling up on its middle section or by using salt, heat, or insect repellent. Dislodging by squeezing, salting, burning, or otherwise annoying the leech while it is feeding will cause it to regurgitate, most likely spreading the bacteria from its digestive system into your open wound, causing infection.

2. Identify the anterior (oral) sucker. Look for the small end of the leech. A common mistake is to go immediately to the large sucker.

3. Place a fingernail on your skin (not on the leech itself), directly adjacent to the oral sucker.

4. Gently but firmly slide your finger toward where the leech is feeding and push the sucker away sideways. When the seal made by the oral sucker is broken, the leech will stop feeding. After the oral sucker has been dislodged, the leech’s head will seek to reattach, and it may quickly attach to the finger that displaced the head. Even if the oral sucker attaches again, the leech does not begin to feed immediately.

5. Displace the posterior (hind) sucker. While continuing to flick occasionally at the small end, push at or pick under the large end (hind sucker) with a fingernail to cause it to lose its suction.

6. Dispose of the leech. At this point, the leech may have securely attached itself to the finger you used to remove it. Flick it off—it should detach easily. Once the leech is detached, you can put salt or insect repellent directly on it to keep it from attaching to anything else.

7. Treat the wound. After the leech’s anticoagulants lose their effect, the wound should heal quickly. Keep the area clean, and cover it with a small bandage if necessary. Avoid scratching the wound. If itching becomes severe, take an antihistamine.

 

[larkspur]

I didn't see the answer to the elevator question but this one could come in handy

Dating & Sex Survival

How to Determine the Gender of Your Date

* Look at her (or his) hand. Compare the length of your date’s fourth and second fingers. Most men have ring fingers that are conspicuously longer than their index fingers, whereas most women have ring fingers that are close to the same length. Testosterone levels likely account for the greater length. Also take notice of the amount of hair on your date’s knuckles, hands, and forearms. Most men will have visible, dark hair (or signs of recently removed hair) on their hands and wrists, and sometimes knuckles.

* Be suspicious of baggy clothing. Your intended may be trying to conceal a telltale bulge.

* Look for an Adam’s apple. Most men have a bump in the middle of their throat. Most women do not.

* Observe shoulders and hips. Men’s shoulders tend to be broader than their hips, while women’s hips and shoulders tend to be closer to the same width. Do not be fooled by shoulder pads.

* Follow your target up a flight of stairs. Take note of how she (or he) moves while ascending. Men tend to walk in a more “straight ahead” motion with minimal “wobbling” back and forth. Women tend to sway a bit from side to side, due to the position of their pelvises. Women also tend to lean forward slightly.

Be Aware

* Look for at least three of these characteristics before you draw conclusions about your date’s gender, then make your plans accordingly.

* Voice is not always a good indicator of gender—a low voice may simply be the result of hard living.

 

[wolram]

I didn't see the answer to the elevator question but this one could come in handy

Dating & Sex Survival

How to Determine the Gender of Your Date

* Look at her (or his) hand. Compare the length of your date’s fourth and second fingers. Most men have ring fingers that are conspicuously longer than their index fingers, whereas most women have ring fingers that are close to the same length. Testosterone levels likely account for the greater length. Also take notice of the amount of hair on your date’s knuckles, hands, and forearms. Most men will have visible, dark hair (or signs of recently removed hair) on their hands and wrists, and sometimes knuckles.

* Be suspicious of baggy clothing. Your intended may be trying to conceal a telltale bulge.

* Look for an Adam’s apple. Most men have a bump in the middle of their throat. Most women do not.

* Observe shoulders and hips. Men’s shoulders tend to be broader than their hips, while women’s hips and shoulders tend to be closer to the same width. Do not be fooled by shoulder pads.

* Follow your target up a flight of stairs. Take note of how she (or he) moves while ascending. Men tend to walk in a more “straight ahead” motion with minimal “wobbling” back and forth. Women tend to sway a bit from side to side, due to the position of their pelvises. Women also tend to lean forward slightly.

Be Aware

* Look for at least three of these characteristics before you draw conclusions about your date’s gender, then make your plans accordingly.

* Voice is not always a good indicator of gender—a low voice may simply be the result of hard living.

I would just look and see if the loo seat was up or down.

 

[Kurdt]

I would just look and see if the loo seat was up or down.

You'd have to persuade them to use the toilet and that might make them run away.

 

[Moonbear]

From MoonBs link, was this ans in the opptions?

The option in the quiz was to pry the sucker off with your finger. Nothing about using just your fingernail or all those bits about keeping it from deciding to just attach to your finger next, which is why I didn't choose that option...I figured that would just relocate the leech from some other place on your body to your fingertip, and unless the leech was in an incredibly sensitive location in the first place, or you're really covered in them, chancing it attaching to a fingertip sounds way ouchier than just leaving it alone until it drops off by itself from wherever it latched on the first time!

 

[Moonbear]

I didn't see the answer to the elevator question but this one could come in handy

Dating & Sex Survival

How to Determine the Gender of Your Date

There were also instructions on how to avoid an alien abduction (I think it was under "travel" emergencies). Now we know how seriously to take the advice.

 

[larkspur]

There were also instructions on how to avoid an alien abduction (I think it was under "travel" emergencies). Now we know how seriously to take the advice.

I especially liked the suggestion to try to communicate telepathically with your alien abductor.

 

[BobG]

I didn't see the answer to the elevator question but this one could come in handy

Dating & Sex Survival

How to Determine the Gender of Your Date

* Look at her (or his) hand. Compare the length of your date’s fourth and second fingers. Most men have ring fingers that are conspicuously longer than their index fingers, whereas most women have ring fingers that are close to the same length. Testosterone levels likely account for the greater length. Also take notice of the amount of hair on your date’s knuckles, hands, and forearms. Most men will have visible, dark hair (or signs of recently removed hair) on their hands and wrists, and sometimes knuckles.

* Be suspicious of baggy clothing. Your intended may be trying to conceal a telltale bulge.

* Look for an Adam’s apple. Most men have a bump in the middle of their throat. Most women do not.

* Observe shoulders and hips. Men’s shoulders tend to be broader than their hips, while women’s hips and shoulders tend to be closer to the same width. Do not be fooled by shoulder pads.

* Follow your target up a flight of stairs. Take note of how she (or he) moves while ascending. Men tend to walk in a more “straight ahead” motion with minimal “wobbling” back and forth. Women tend to sway a bit from side to side, due to the position of their pelvises. Women also tend to lean forward slightly.

Be Aware

* Look for at least three of these characteristics before you draw conclusions about your date’s gender, then make your plans accordingly.

* Voice is not always a good indicator of gender—a low voice may simply be the result of hard living.

Ann Coulter has a rather large Adam's apple.

I scored 64% survival and 25% death.

Some of this is just the lesser of evils. For example, if your parachute fails to open, you should hook your arms in the front of your buddy's harness. When his chute opens, the force will probably dislocate or break your arms. The weight of both of you will be more than the chute was designed for, so have your partner aim for a landing in the water. That way you can tread water with dislocated and broken arms until you're rescued.

 

[Moonbear]

Ann Coulter has a rather large Adam's apple.

The jury's still out there. Ann Coulter seems to say a lot of things about women that make it sound like she doesn't consider herself one.

 

[DaveC426913]

Ann Coulter has a rather large Adam's apple.

Some of this is just the lesser of evils. For example, if your parachute fails to open, you should hook your arms in the front of your buddy's harness. When his chute opens, the force will probably dislocate or break your arms. The weight of both of you will be more than the chute was designed for, so have your partner aim for a landing in the water. That way you can tread water with dislocated and broken arms until you're rescued.

Um. Yes. Why do you see this as "just" the lesser of evils?

Living is a lesser evil than dying. Any further granularity is simply picking nits.

 

[larkspur]

Ann Coulter has a rather large Adam's apple.

She has kind of a deep voice too...I have not noticed the length of her fingers though. I'll have to pay attention next time I see her on TV

 

[BobG]

Um. Yes. Why do you see this as "just" the lesser of evils?

Living is a lesser evil than dying. Any further granularity is simply picking nits.

Well, this is a worst case scenario, which means no one is actually coming to rescue you. You'll tread water with broken arms, your buddy with two unbroken arms will swim away, and you'll eventually die alone.

Besides, there doesn't seem to be much variety in their solutions. When describing how to survive when your credit card is declined, they teach you how to dine and dash. They say you should tell your date what's going on so she doesn't cluelessly sit at the table while you're dashing.

In the "How to Escape a Bad Date" article, the procedure seems to be about the same, except you don't tell your date you're about to dash.

Edit: I'm just kind of ticked that I didn't see the "How to Survive Getting Your Tie Caught in the Document Shredder" before last week. You know your coworkers are pathetic when you call for help and they attack the shredder with three-hole punches and staple pullers. Silly, read the warning label, "Ensure staples are removed before shredding". Any fool can see staples will kill the evil beast!