Finding Solace in Favourite Quotes: Escaping Despair with Words of Wisdom

[Ivan Seeking]

On my block, a lot of people walk their dogs, and I always see them walking
along with their little poop bags, which to me is just the lowest function of
human life. If aliens are watching this through telescopes, they're going to think
the dogs are the leaders. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a
poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume was in charge?

- Seinfeld

 

[Ivan Seeking]

You know, I played high school football for four years, and this is the first time that I've been on the field

---Sen. Lindsey Graham; speaking from a high school football field.

 

[Redbelly98]

"Party boobytrap" is a palindrome. - an observation by BobG

Excuse me. Did you say Palin-drome?

 

[OmCheeto]

We still don't believe in evolution... Except in your case.

a christian acquaintance of mine

 

[Ivan Seeking]

The practice of registering dead people to vote:

"Representation without respiration" - Mayor Daley, of Chicago

 

[lisab]

a christian acquaintance of mine

Aren't Christian friends fun...One told me once that I'm going to be the kindest person in hell.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Aren't Christian friends fun...One told me once that I'm going to be the kindest person in hell.

When I was about twenty years of age, I went through a real religious phase that included a revisitation of my Catholicism. Having never approached Catholicism as an adult, I went to a priest to discuss some of my concerns. Before the evening was over, he accused me of going there to trick him.

I figured that if I managed to rattle a priest, at least they must be good questions.

 

[DaveC426913]

I went to a priest to discuss some of my concerns. Before the evening was over, he accused me of going there to trick him.

This doesn't surprise me. Nothing personal to you but I'll bet a lot of non-practicing people go to priests with a hidden agenda - hidden even from themselves. They probably genuinely think they're there to be open-minded, but they end up arguing their own beliefs and "taking easy shots" at religion. Priests probably look like slow-moving captive targets for such discourse. I'll bet people get quite accusatory in fact.

I'm not suggesting you were doing this, but I imagine you're not the first person to walk into that priest's church with questions.

 

[rootX]

Aren't Christian friends fun...One told me once that I'm going to be the kindest person in hell.

Mine said we all going to hell (including herself).

 

[OmCheeto]

Aren't Christian friends fun...One told me once that I'm going to be the kindest person in hell.

Do you remember what I said my brother said?

I've volunteered to go to hell, to comfort the suffering.

He's a devout atheist, much to the chagrin of my devout sister.
I was going to recommend to my brothers husband that he take up pastafarianism.
At least he'd be a deist.

 

[JasonRox]

All the naughty girls are in hell. All the virgins are in heaven.

Looks like I'm going to hell.

 

[NeoDevin]

I've got to side with Jason on this one, it's a no brainer.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

US President Lyndon B Johnson was known to possesses a forceful personality that helped him get what he wanted. One morning, being anxious to discuss some issue with a US Senator [IIRC], Johnson called him at home at 5 AM and asked what he was doing.

"Oh, nothing Mr. President. I was just lying here hoping that you would call", he responded.

 

[phyzmatix]

Don't do anything you can't undo unless you know what you can't do once you've done it.

Robin Hobb (quoted from one of her books)

 

[sigh]

"life is like a box of chocolates"
outa the movie forest gump

Funny how i don't seem to like chocolate at the mo...
(woop woop 1st post)

 

[Ivan Seeking]

"No matter what happens on November 4th, there won't be any black people at work on November 5th." - Chris Rock

 

[Ivan Seeking]

During Reagan's last day as President, Tim Russert asked him if it helped being an actor.
Reagan replied: "I don't think anyone could do this job if they weren't an actor".
-- as told by Paul Begala

 

[OmCheeto]

"No matter what happens on November 4th, there won't be any black people at work on November 5th." - Chris Rock

I'll put that on my vacation schedule calendar tomorrow.

Poor old 55 year old kid never takes a day off...

Calvin! You get a day off!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Please don't ixnay this post. Calvin will get a kick out of it. I hope. Tuesday of course will tell...

 

[Ivan Seeking]

JIM LEHRER: How do you read it, David, the Obama campaign?

DAVID BROOKS: Well, it has been a smoothly run campaign. The thing that strikes me about the campaign is how nice it is. I mean, they're not always accessible, especially with the candidate, but they are nice people.

MARK SHIELDS: They are nice.

DAVID BROOKS: When, in our business, you write something negative about a campaign, and you get a call often the next day, and they tell you you're a complete idiot.

With the Obama campaign, they'll call you up and they'll say, "You know, David, we love you. You're a great guy. We really respect your work. It's so sad that you're a complete idiot."

http://www.pbs.org/newshour/bb/politics/july-dec08/sbelection_10-31.html

Another interesting one that I caught tonight. Apparently this is a common saying among [water impoverished] cattle ranchers in Montana.

Whiskey is for drinking. Water is for fighting!

 

[flying fish]

"It IS a take-home test. Once I grade it and give it back, you can take it home"

- One of my Physics Professors.

"An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs."

- Mitch Hedberg

 

[Ivan Seeking]

I am Joe the cellist

- Yo-Yo Ma

 

[Ivan Seeking]

There is no Republican Party. It has been crushed.

- Ed Rollins; Republican political strategist

 

[OmCheeto]

“If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog”

My local radio stations response to Obama's xmas puppy comment.

 

[OmCheeto]

Vote for a Senator with convictions!

Norman Ornstein's slogan for Ted Stevens
C-Span
Live
7:44 am

 

[needlesstosay]

"Hate is baggage. Life's too short to be pissed off all the time" - Danny Vinyard off American History X

 

[Ivan Seeking]

The Obama family will soon move into a house built by slaves
http://www.whitehousehistory.org/06/subs/06_a04.html

 

[OmCheeto]

The Obama family will soon move into a house built by slaves
http://www.whitehousehistory.org/06/subs/06_a04.html

Barack Obama is proof that no matter how successful a black man you are, you still live in government housing.

Or should that go in the favorite/worst jokes section?

 

[Jimmy Snyder]

The Obama family will soon move into a house built by slaves

As a (public) servant.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Jay Leno to Senator McCain: How are you sleeping this week?

McCain: I'm sleeping like a baby! I sleep two hours, then I wake up and cry; sleep two hours...

 

[Ivan Seeking]

When it is darkest, the stars shine brightly

- Jesse Jackson on Obama.

 

[dyosa]

A line of Gandalf Greyhem to Saruman the Wise in Lord of the Rings ' Tell me, when did Saruman abandon reason for madness?'

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Be fearful when others are greedy, and greedy when others are fearful

- Warren Buffett

 

[sigh]

Common sense is not so common.

 

[sigh]

A high IQ can never make up for a lack of commen sence.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Twenty-five percent of those exonerated by DNA evidence had confessed to a crime that they did not commit

-Jami Floyd; Defense attorney