Questioning Unnecessary Tasks: Why Fold Underwear?

[MathStudent]

cleaning paint brushes sucks. so does matching socks. I either make sure all my socks are the same or I throw them away and buy new ones. They don't cost much and everyone loves new socks.

I'm totally in line with that one... I refuse to spend any time looking for the matching pair of a sock ... I'd rather just throw them all away and by a new set!

 

[MathStudent]

I hate cleaning the cat box. I tried using the disposable plastic box liners but the cat just scratches the liner to shreds so everything ended up in the box anyway.

I had to buy one of those hooded boxes because one cat goes into wild scratching frenzies and would fling litter and poop for three feet outside the box in all directions. Another one just never quite figured the box out, he'd put all four paws inside the box, but his rear end would hang "just outside" the edge of the box and go on the floor instead, then he'd shovel the litter out of the box and unto the floor to cover it up. He did keep the litter box clean though.

hahaha My sister uses the trash compacter bags to line her cat's box, They're made out of a much thicker material and thus are more resistant to disgruntled kitties

 

[Moonbear]

cleaning paint brushes sucks. so does matching socks. I either make sure all my socks are the same or I throw them away and buy new ones. They don't cost much and everyone loves new socks.

I just make sure all mine are so different that it's easy to match them (I like fun, patterned socks). The rest are all the same type of white socks for wearing with sneakers.

Another one just never quite figured the box out, he'd put all four paws inside the box, but his rear end would hang "just outside" the edge of the box and go on the floor instead, then he'd shovel the litter out of the box and unto the floor to cover it up. He did keep the litter box clean though.

That's why I prefer dogs. Don't they make big trays or mats you can put under the box to keep the floor clean? Cats are easy to come by, I'd have traded it in for a neater one.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

There is a line that I thought was most memorable as it relates to jobs and animals. I heard this long ago on a show about rhinoceri. After arriving at the rhinoceros pen, one biologist got out of the car and called to the other, "are you ready to masturbate that rhino yet?"

I thought to myself, now there's a job that I wouldn't want.

 

[futb0l]

I like to pick apart things that we do for no good reason. What job or tasks do you find to be a waste of your time?

My vote: Folding underwear. I can't think of one good reason to fold underwear...and on principle I refuse to do it.

Lmao, folding underwear!

 

[franznietzsche]

There is a line that I thought was most memorable as it relates to jobs and animals. I heard this long ago on a show about rhinoceri. After arriving at the rhinoceros pen, one biologist got out of the car and called to the other, "are you ready to masturbate that rhino yet?"

I thought to myself, now there's a job that I wouldn't want.

Definitely a job i don't want.


I mean, just ewwwwww.

 

[tribdog]

I've been told tribdog's have peni comparable to rhino peni when it comes to sheer girth, so I'd be willing to tickle some rhino testicles.

 

[Moonbear]

I've been told tribdog's have peni comparable to rhino peni when it comes to sheer girth, so I'd be willing to tickle some rhino testicles.

I'm not sure which part of that comment I want to address first, so I'm just going to leave it with... Things aren't looking so favorable for you anymore trib.

 

[tribdog]

I'm not sure which part of that comment I want to address first, so I'm just going to leave it with... .

That's a common first reaction, but don't worry I'll take it nice and slow.


lol, I'm sorry. I apologize for my brief detour along testosterone lane. While I don't know exactly how well endowed rhinos are, I am somewhat familiar with tribdogs and sincerely doubt there is any similarity in either length width shape or color.

Side note: Any correlation between the famously poor eyesight of the rhino and scientific masturbation?

 

[Moonbear]

lol, I'm sorry. I apologize for my brief detour along testosterone lane. While I don't know exactly how well endowed rhinos are, I am somewhat familiar with tribdogs and sincerely doubt there is any similarity in either length width shape or color.

Thank heavens! You were nearly relegated to life locking in a room with a teasing dummy!

Side note: Any correlation between the famously poor eyesight of the rhino and scientific masturbation?

Probably. That rhino had to be pretty blind to mistake the scientist for another rhino, don't you think?

 

[Artman]

There is a line that I thought was most memorable as it relates to jobs and animals. I heard this long ago on a show about rhinoceri. After arriving at the rhinoceros pen, one biologist got out of the car and called to the other, "are you ready to masturbate that rhino yet?"

I thought to myself, now there's a job that I wouldn't want.

Okay, but there is a problem with this job. If the biologist does the job, is that really masterbation (I mean, it would only be masterbation if the Rhino did it himself, right)? If the biologist is being paid to do that, isn't he a sort of rhino prostitute?

So the biologists get out of their car and one rhino looks at the other and says, "Did you call a hooker?"

 

[Artman]

Yeah I can picture it all...

The biologist is wearing a short, tight lab coat, too much make-up and high heals. Roxanne is blasting on the car radio. He saunters over to the Rhino and says, "Hey big boy, are you feeling 'horny'? Does that thing always stick up on your nose, or are you just happy to see me?"

 

[Artman]

Rhino says, "At least kiss me first. I like to be kissed."

 

[franznietzsche]

Rhino says, "At least kiss me first. I like to be kissed."

Just stop. Please stop.

 

[Artman]

I don't remember if I answered the question yet. Along similar lines to tribdog's post about cleaning paint brushes, cleaning roller covers. They cost about a buck apiece to buy new ones, they take hours of washing and gallons of water to get all of the paint out. I've just taken to wrapping them in old plastic bags and tossing them out.

Now back to the Biologist and the Rhino...

Biologist gets out of the car, and the rhino thinks, "Oh yeah, papa knows what I like."

 

[Artman]

...one biologist got out of the car and called to the other, "are you ready to masturbate that rhino yet?"

Rhino hooker pimp.

 

[Gokul43201]

Artman, you're quite the rhino expert.

Ever been to a rhino bachelor party (and I mean the real thing...biologists and all) ?

 

[Artman]

Artman, you're quite the rhino expert.

Ever been to a rhino bachelor party (and I mean the real thing...biologists and all) ?

I got to thinking, we may be misinterpreting what they said. Maybe they were talking about the rhino's capture. You know, how the one biologist did such an expert job setting up the trap, and placing the bait. They could have just been saying that he was a "masterbaiter" of rhinos.

 

[Artman]

Then again it could be another one of those zoological euphamisms and not have anything to do with rhinos.

You know, like "spanking the monkey." I mean, if someone was actually spanking a monkey, they would get in trouble with the SPCA, right?

Of course if you called the SPCA when someone said it was time to "Masterbate the rhino," the rhino would say, "Now hold on, let's not be hasty here. If someone wants to masterbate a rhino, I'm down with that. It's not like a monkey is getting spanked or something."

 

[Artman]

I thought it might be good to have a Barry White song to help set the proper mood for the rhino.

Here's one that seems appropriate:

"Let The Music Play"
By Barry White

One ticket, please
Lord have mercy, everybody’s there
Hey, what’s goin’ on man, yeah
She’s at home, yeah, she’s at home
Yeah, she’s at home

Let the music play
I just want to dance the night away
Here, right here, right here is where I’m going to stay
All night long, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, wee

Let the music play on
Just until I feel this misery is gone
Movin’, kickin’, groovin’, keep the music strong
On and on and on and on and on and on and on
and on and on and on and on and on and on and on

I’m out here dancin’ and still, huh
I can’t erase the things I feel
The tender love we used to share
See, it’s like it’s no longer there
I’ve got to hide what’s killin’ me inside

Let the music play
I just want to dance the night away
Here, right here, right here is where I’m going to stay
All night long, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

Let the music play on
Just until I feel this misery is gone
Ah, movin’, kickin’, groovin’, keep the music strong
Ah, let it play on and on, let it play on and on and on and on and on and on, play on, and on, play

I think I’m going to be alright, ha, ha, ha
If I can make it through the night, oh, Lord
I’ll just pretend she’s here with me
I’ll close my eyes, her face I’ll see
I know it’s make believe, but it’s the only hope for me

Let the music play
I just want to dance the night away
Ah, here, right here is where I’m going to stay
All night long, ooh, ooh, ooh, wee

Let the music play on
Just until I feel this misery is gone
Movin’, kickin’, groovin’, keep the music strong
Let it play on, let it play on, let it play on, please, let it play on, let it play on

This line seems to work very well:

Let the music play on
Just until I feel this misery is gone
Movin’, kickin’, groovin’, keep the music strong
On and on and on and on and on and on and on
and on and on and on and on and on and on and on

 

[franznietzsche]

Thanks to Artman, i no longer want my eyes.

I'll have to learn to program in braille, but that's ok.

 

[Artman]

Thanks to Artman, i no longer want my eyes.

I'll have to learn to program in braille, but that's ok.

Ah Franz, you know what they say, once you go rhino, you can't go back.

 

[Evo]

Artman, you're going to get me fired. I'm sitting here laughing and spraying coffee all over my desk. I'm sure when people here the bursts of laughter, they know I'm not working.

 

[Tsu]

I'm sitting here laughing and spraying coffee all over my desk.

You really need to get that fixed, you know?

 

[Artman]

Artman, you're going to get me fired. I'm sitting here laughing and spraying coffee all over my desk. I'm sure when people here the bursts of laughter, they know I'm not working.

I'm just trying to get at what is really going on here. I am still in favor of the zoological euphemism idea. When you think about it, who is really out there choking chickens?

I mean sure chickens are killed everyday, but how many are dying from forced asphixiation? Imagine the sheer number of dead chickens just from high school age boys! It boggles the mind!

 

[Moonbear]

Okay, given the way this thread is going, I don't know if I should even speak up here, but I'm quite surprised they actually said "masturbate the rhino," especially with cameras present. There are lingo/euphemisms that wouldn't raise much of an eyebrow if overheard by an audience. Usually, one would ask, "Who's going to collect the rhino." When working in zoos full of small children with big ears, it just sounds like you're going to lead the rhino into its pen. It's not done by hand, but using an AV (no, that's not referring to audio visual equipment) and the reason it's being used is for AI (not artificial intelligence).

And, no, I haven't bothered getting AI certification, so am content to let others do that job. I play more the role of the pimp or madam.

 

[Artman]

...It's not done by hand, but using an AV (no, that's not referring to audio visual equipment) and the reason it's being used is for AI (not artificial intelligence)...

But don't you think a little Barry White would help the whole process?

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Actually, I wanted to ask about that Moonbear. IIRC, they talked about electroejaculation, or electroejaculators, or maybe I just made up the word based on what I remember...

Also, I suspect that little scene was actually staged for the camera. You know, kind of like using an ET avatar just to be provocative.

This reminds me of Woody Allen's Sleeper.

 

[Evo]

But don't you think a little Barry White would help the whole process?

Barry White is definitely in order! Perhaps a few National Geographic magazines with some female rhino centerfolds might not be a bad idea either. Or some videos?

 

[Moonbear]

Actually, I wanted to ask about that Moonbear. IIRC, they talked about electroejaculation, or electroejaculators, or maybe I just made up the word based on what I remember...

Eeeeooooowwww! Yep, those things really exist, and people really use them. I'm not sure how frequently they are used in a zoo setting, perhaps more frequently than in a farm setting because the captive animals in zoos often need to be anesthetized just to handle them. In a farm setting, it's pretty rare. It is painful and there usually isn't any problem training bulls and stallions (the two species most commonly bred by AI) to use a mounting dummy.

 

[BobG]

Actually, I wanted to ask about that Moonbear. IIRC, they talked about electroejaculation, or electroejaculators, or maybe I just made up the word based on what I remember...

Also, I suspect that little scene was actually staged for the camera. You know, kind of like using an ET avatar just to be provocative.

This reminds me of Woody Allen's Sleeper.

It reminds me of "A Boy and His Dog", that movie made from Harlan Ellison's story.

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Eeeeooooowwww! Yep, those things really exist, and people really use them. I'm not sure how frequently they are used in a zoo setting, perhaps more frequently than in a farm setting because the captive animals in zoos often need to be anesthetized just to handle them. In a farm setting, it's pretty rare. It is painful and there usually isn't any problem training bulls and stallions (the two species most commonly bred by AI) to use a mounting dummy.

Pssssssss, hey, Moonbear, where can I pick up one of those...

 

[Artman]

Barry White is definitely in order! Perhaps a few National Geographic magazines with some female rhino centerfolds might not be a bad idea either. Or some videos?

That's the spirit! Maybe some scented candles and a backrub. None of this, "whose turn is it to masterbate the rhino" stuff.

Barry playing in the background..."Let the music play..."

Some candles glowing..."I just want to dance the night away..."

The music pulsating with the rythym... "Here, right here, right here..."

The scent of jasmine in the fragrant smoke..."is where I’m going to stay

Boom-chucka-wow-wow, "All night long...,"

Rhino love baby..." ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, wee"

Oh yeah.

(verse from Barry White's song "Let the Music Play")

 

[franznietzsche]

That's the spirit! Maybe some scented candles and a backrub. None of this, "whose turn is it to masterbate the rhino" stuff.

Barry playing in the background..."Let the music play..."

Some candles glowing..."I just want to dance the night away..."

The music pulsating with the rythym... "Here, right here, right here..."

The scent of jasmine in the fragrant smoke..."is where I’m going to stay

Boom-chucka-wow-wow, "All night long...,"

Rhino love baby..." ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, wee"

Oh yeah.

(verse from Barry White's song "Let the Music Play")

Scarred for life. Seriously. Scarred. I can never hear barry white again without thinking of this thread. fie on you.

 

[Moonbear]

Pssssssss, hey, Moonbear, where can I pick up one of those...

The electroejaculator, or the mounting dummy?