First World Problems: Share the Silliest Things That Bug You!

[wukunlin]

ugh I hate offshore call centres. I find it difficult to communicate with them, and the people who work there are uncomfortable when we are not used to their accents. I wish they can train people to have BBC newsreader accents (I'm no Brit, but I imagine this is one of the most widely accepted English accents) for offshore call centres.

Edit: turned out accent training is a work in progress. Still some ways to go though...
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2011/feb/09/india-call-centres-accent-neutralisation

 

[Danger]

People who say "literally" when they mean exactly the opposite, and the twits writing dictionaries who altered the definition to fit the stupidity.
(To avoid insulting a particular member here, who I was attempting to assist with an engineering problem, I point out that he typed "I'm literally doing is as we speak". I jokingly pointed out that he was figuratively doing it as we speak, because we've never actually spoken. He was literally doing it as we typed. In that case, his use of "literally" was correct; his use of "speaking" was not. :D We all do that, though.)

 

[OmCheeto]

When the red button doesn't work, even after two days...

 

[edward]

When the red button doesn't work, even after two days... View attachment 75912

Did you remember to wind it up??

 

[RonL]

When the red button doesn't work, even after two days... View attachment 75912

You did put the bird in the oven, RIGHT ??:D

 

[Danger]

When the red button doesn't work, even after two days...

What the hell is that thing? A thermite charge initiator? Some new kind of bionic turkey? I've never seen an electronic bird before. You Yanks have some very peculiar quirks in your dietary habits.

 

[Borg]

What the hell is that thing? A thermite charge initiator? Some new kind of bionic turkey? I've never seen an electronic bird before. You Yanks have some very peculiar quirks in your dietary habits.

It's a pop-up turkey timer. Actually pretty useful to keep people from serving undercooked birds.

 

[Danger]

Amazing.
I see an opportunity to bugger up the life of a relative that you don't like but are forced to dine with. Visit ahead of time and replace his/her timer with one that you've Superglued down.

 

[mfb]

People who say "literally" when they mean exactly the opposite

Yes, and it is so much fun!

 

[Danger]

Oh, man, but I love that show! I regret that I didn't discover it years before I did. I do seriously consider it to be the best and most reliable US broadcast for political and social news, and never boring about it.

 

[OmCheeto]

It's a pop-up turkey timer. Actually pretty useful to keep people from serving undercooked birds.

Oh. They're set at 185°F. I had my oven set at 180°F.

Anyways, after two days of trans-Thanksgiving feasting, I decided I was starving to death, but was no longer interested in eating turkey.
All I wanted, was a grilled cheese sandwich.
But, I didn't have a can of tomato soup. (I have recently learned, that it is a necessary component of the meal).
And when I opened my front door, to go to the store to get some, I discovered it was cold outside.

Had the temperature been 10°F cooler, and I'd stood there for about 3 weeks, I might literally have frozen to death.

But I didn't stand there, so that didn't happen.

Though, there were many other problems. The windows in my truck were all fogged up, and I had to use a towel to wipe them clear. Then my truck didn't start on the first attempt. It took two. Then the owner of the store was helping another customer at the ATM determine why he couldn't get money out of the ATM*. I had to wait! Like, nearly, 30 SECONDS! Ahhhh!

There were many other problems, but I eventually made my grilled cheese sandwiches.

ps. I just learned how to make them, about a week ago. So there is hope. We can overcome 1st world problems, if we just put in the effort.
* Convenience store owner(CSO); "Um. Look here at the little receipt looking piece of paper. It says you have $3.57 in your account. I think that's maybe why it won't give you any money".
Drunken Idiot; "Oh. Ok. That kind of makes sense. hmmm... Are you sure?"
CSO; "It's been my experience".
Drunken Idiot; "Oh. Ok."

 

[Danger]

I had my oven set at 180°F.

That's not cooking; it's torture. But, at least it doesn't smell as bad if you've forgotten to take the feathers off.

 

[edward]

That's not cooking; it's torture. But, at least it doesn't smell as bad if you've forgotten to take the feathers off.

That reminds me of why all commercial turkeys are white. When darker colored birds are plucked they leave an unattractive trace of their original feather color in the skin. Apparently it took 200 years and a number of corporate consultants before anyone noticed.

 

[lisab]

I had the *ultimate* first-world problem last night: I had a hard time getting to sleep because I ate too much.

 

[RonL]

I had the *ultimate* first-world problem last night: I had a hard time getting to sleep because I ate too much.

I find that two Advil PM tablets, taken 1/2 to 1 hour before going to bed, will give a good nights rest (usually 6+ hours) my average sleep is between 4 and 5 hours a night.
Working too hard during the day is usually what keeps me from resting at night.:)

 

[OmCheeto]

That's not cooking; it's torture. But, at least it doesn't smell as bad if you've forgotten to take the feathers off.

It's the way I've cooked them, for about 20 years. Though, previously, I always put them in the oven the evening before, just before going to bed, so they will be done by morning.

ps. Here in the "naughty" colonies, we've learned to hunt only for the featherless GMO anglo-saxony type turkeys.

pps. My sister flew up from the tropics this last week, so I decided to start answering the phone again.
Big mistake:

Om's [also retired] bro; "I bin fishin' like 20 times. Why didn't you answer the phone"?
Om; "Was busy. So how many fish did you catch"?
Om's bro; "50"!
Om; "So you have smoked salmon coming out of your butt then. Awesome! I'll be right over".
Om's bro; "No. I had to let them all go. I'd reached my limit, months ago".
...

Om's [also retired] friend; "Hey! You can answer the phone. Let me tell you about what's on TV."
Om's phone; "Click"​

ppps. So I'm leaning towards agreeing with Evo and Russ at the moment, regarding "FREE MONEY!"
Though, on the other hand, some of my other fellow retirees seem to be self-entertaining, and apparently remember what the economic phrase; "value added" means. As in; "Now that you've worked your butt off for most of your life, to get your free money, what value are you adding to society? Or are you just going to sit around and, metaphorically speaking, masturbate for the remainder of your life"?

hmmm... I wonder if 3rd worlders have these "Omic" types of ranty thoughts?

And why are "Omic" and "ranty" underlined in red?

hmmm... I wonder if this is how Andy Rooney got started.

Ok. Time for a nap.

 

[Danger]

And why are "Omic" and "ranty" underlined in red?

I think that "Omic" should be "Omious"...

 

[RonL]

ppps. So I'm leaning towards agreeing with Evo and Russ at the moment, regarding "FREE MONEY!"
Though, on the other hand, some of my other fellow retirees seem to be self-entertaining, and apparently remember what the economic phrase; "value added" means. As in; "Now that you've worked your butt off for most of your life, to get your free money, what value are you adding to society? Or are you just going to sit around and, metaphorically speaking, masturbate for the remainder of your life"?

Ok. Time for a nap.

You really ask some of the hardest questions!:)

 

[Danger]

Previews. I don't want to see what's "and coming up" until it comes up; that just ruins the show for me. I have to have my finger on the FF button to zip it before it registers, or the mute button if it happens to be live. I watch movie trailers, though, because I can't go to the theatre any more and I'll have forgotten them by the time it comes on TV.

 

[Danger]

Celebrity promotional give-aways. People like Ellen and Oprah throw enough expensive gifts to their followers in one day, just for being in the audience, to feed a hundred African children for a year.

 

[RonL]

Celebrity promotional give-aways. People like Ellen and Oprah throw enough expensive gifts to their followers in one day, just for being in the audience, to feed a hundred African children for a year.

I have never researched it, but it might be surprising to many people, who pays for what and how much, in those give-away actions.oo):)

 

[Danger]

Most of it is done by the manufacturers of the products, or services in the case of cash like Shutterfly does. I still think that it would be better advertising for a company to donate cash to a charity than toss out products to people who don't need them. I admit that a lot of the stuff goes to people who fat North Americans think of as "needy", such as a family with only one car or someone who can't afford new furniture, but I'm pretty sure that saving lives would be more important.

 

[AnOldStudent]

... I'm pretty sure that saving lives would be more important.

Totally agreed!

 

[Borg]

My first world problem this morning... I hate it when the filter collapses in the coffee maker causing a bunch of the grounds to get into the pot and then into my coffee.

 

[Borg]

Another fun phone game. Calling a business and being forced to listen to a three minute message before you can select anything.

 

[Danger]

Another fun phone game. Calling a business and being forced to listen to a three minute message before you can select anything.

Usually, but not always, pushing "0" at any time will immediately switch you to a human operator.

 

[B. Elliott]

Had to point a customer to another business today because we already have too many cars on the lot. Trying to put off hiring someone, but it looks like we may have no choice. The holiday season is supposed to be slow! Geez.

 

[Danger]

we already have too many cars on the lot.

That can be good, bad or ugly depending upon what business you're in. Since it means turning away customers, I assume that you're swamped and are therefore an auto repair or storage facility?

 

[OmCheeto]

Had to point a customer to another business today because we already have too many cars on the lot. Trying to put off hiring someone, but it looks like we may have no choice. The holiday season is supposed to be slow! Geez.

I can work a wrench! It just takes me 5 minutes to find them. (bad eyes)

And who's idea was the pumpkin? That is awesome.

 

[Danger]

a bunch of the grounds to get into the pot and then into my coffee.

I can't quite see why that would be a problem. All you need to do is put a new filter into the holder, pour the coffee through it from the pot into a cooking pot, rinse the coffee pot, and then pour the coffee back into it. (I also removed several thousand fruit flies from my scotch supply every day using a coffee filter and a funnel.)

And who's idea was the pumpkin? That is awesome.
View attachment 76384

I'm really glad that you added that second graphic, because until I saw it I had no idea what the hell you were talking about. I've never had a car with a computer in it, so that pumpkin just looks to me like a couple of rubberized dynamite initiators getting it on in a centrifuge.

 

[OmCheeto]

After the lisab-Santorum incident, I leaned away from warning people about googling certain things, nor even mentioning them.

...a couple of rubberized dynamite initiators getting it on in a centrifuge.

I think I learned something that day.
"RDI" will not be something I post about tomorrow, in the "TIL" page.

You may be straight, but you speak the language, of, um..., another culture.

 

[Danger]

You may be straight, but you speak the language, of, um..., another culture.

I'm not quite sure what that means. I have no culture (or, at least, no class).
What's a "TIL" page?

 

[OmCheeto]

I'm not quite sure what that means. I have no culture (or, at least, no class).
What's a "TIL" page?

TIL = Today I Learned

You posted there, about 4 hours ago.
Jedishrfu coined the new acronym.

We can gang up on him now.

After my nap.

 

[Danger]

TIL = Today I Learned

Okay... thanks. It's really hard to keep track when people just make up short-forms for stuff. I honestly think that if I see another new acronym IJMLMFM. (Somehow, I suspect that you will actually know what that stands for, even though I just made it up.)

 

[B. Elliott]

That can be good, bad or ugly depending upon what business you're in. Since it means turning away customers, I assume that you're swamped and are therefore an auto repair or storage facility?

Automotive repair. Primarily 2000+ European vehicles, even though we've been getting quite a few Hondas and GMs. We just got a new location, so right now we're juggling fixing up the new place and trying to get vehicles in and out of the old location. With only two people it's pretty stressful considering how quickly cars are coming in. That and a high-end auto broker in town wants us to certify about 35 vehicles on their lot ASAP. Not enough time and not enough people. Where's all these immigrants taking everyone's jobs I keep hearing about? I'll take two please! :)

I can work a wrench! It just takes me 5 minutes to find them. (bad eyes)

And who's idea was the pumpkin? That is awesome.
View attachment 76384

Haha! Same here. That's why I have to have all the tools meticulously organized. The Navy and my OCD got along very well! :D

The pumpkin was a friends idea. He has goofy ideas like that all the time.