Thread Killer Champions: Franzbear & Moonbear

BobG · Mar 7, 2005

Threadkiller champion - so much effort for such a meaningless title. Just think; people will look at your post and say "Here lies one whose name was writ in water."

Not such a bad thing, really. Whose grave actually does say "Here lies one whose name was writ in water"? And for those about to jump up and start perusing cemeteries, his name isn't on his grave - just the phrase:

THIS GRAVE CONTAINS
ALL THAT WAS MORTAL OF
A YOUNG ENGLISH POET WHO
ON HIS DEATH-BED
IN THE BITTERNESS OF HIS HEART
at the malicious power of his enemies
desired these words to be engraved
on his tomstone
"HERE LIES ONE WHOSE NAME
WAS WRIT IN WATER"
FEB 24 1821

BobG · Mar 7, 2005

Crude cretans, all of you! You had a chance to let the thread die with such an appropriate final epitaph, yet your craving for personal glory overcame you.

You have Van Gogh's ear for music! And you're all headed to hell in a handbasket!

Edit: Okay, Bartholomew and Moonbear were the only two to post, but I'm sure the rest of you posting in this thread are cretans, too.

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

Cretens eh?

Keats haters eh, Van Gogh's ear for music eh?

How's dis for music? <Removes object from a violin case> Huh, how's dis?

BLAM BLAM BLAM, RAT, TAT, TAT, PRRRRRRAT aTAT a TAT.

Meyeah. I like dat kinda music. :devil:

Moonbear · Mar 7, 2005

*grabs more bandages* Don't worry thread, I'm not going to let Artman kill you. Stay with me, dammit, hang in there! *grabs shock paddles* CLEAR!

Phew, that was close. The thread is now resting comfortably in ICU. No visitors, please.

polyb · Mar 7, 2005

WELCOME TO THE BREAK!

Here at page 102, we have a heated challenge for who will claim the title of 'Thread Killer Champion!', the coveted prize will be an all expense paid trip to an insane asylum complete with shock treatment and plenty of drugs! The second place winner will be limited to the politics forum where they can exercise their skill at killing threads and squashing any real debate! All other contestants will have to hang their heads in shame and carry on with barely any semblence of civil discourse.

So far in the standings we have the follwing contenders:

Moonbare-that's right folks she's still showing her arse and is fighting viscously for that free trip!

Tripdog-Who is so thurooughly entertained that he just keeps it going for kicks!

Frannikki- His sense of self righteous nihlism won't let him leave this thread, besides, he knows he needs therapy!

Bart- Apparently he is having a cow!

Evo- It's either the nuthouse or Evoia, she doesn't care which as long as she is still the forum goddess and overlord!

BobGee- Since his attempts at being a beegee has failed he figures this might be his chance for glory!

Dexterboy-Hanging out in the hash houses of belguim, this is the only way he can escape his graduate thesis work and the tedium of ameircan hippies with no wit!

Fartman-having failed at art, he figured this would be a good scatological end to his dreams!

Will this thread ever end?
Do our contestants know how if there is truly a bottom to this bottomless pit?
Why do they waste their time?
Is there anything better on this forum?
Where is Greg the hairy one?

That's all for now folks, stay tuned to find out if this thread will ever find it's resting place in the web arhives where is should have been laid to rest when it was hashed out of tribs devious brane!

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

dextercioby said:

It's still bleeding,though,the hemoragy is very severe,as the wounds were very deep.How many chances of survival do you think is has...?

Daniel.

None!

Here's your stinkin' flowers, you dirty rat thread!BLAM BLAM BLAM RAT RAT RAT cool person, cool person.

Darn gunjam!

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

polyb said:

Fartman-having failed at art, he figured this would be a good scatological end to his dreams!

<Takes aim at polyb> Start sqirmin' you worm.

polyb · Mar 7, 2005

Artman said:

<Takes aim at polyb> Start sqirmin' you worm.

In full scatological form today!

Being in the press box, I'm impervious to attacks!

Good luck on your quest!

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

polyb said:

Being in the press box, I'm impervious to attacks!

Good luck on your quest!

Well, you know what they say, those who can do and those who can't, write about it from the press box.

Gonzolo · Mar 7, 2005

You know, this championship is pretty much like an Indy 500 except it's an Indy N : N-> Infinity

I am reminded of a hamster running in its wheel.

My god... I just called myself a hamster.

Moonbear · Mar 7, 2005

BobG said:

There's hope!

What was that movie where the hamster died because it didn't know how to stop running or how to get out of the wheel once it started running? (It has that scene in it where he and his girlfriend visit a friend who shoots an arrow straight up into the air and they show an arrow's view of the girl and the two guys watching the arrow and trying to make sure they're not standing where the arrow's going to come down.)

Edit: On the other hand, did you ever notice how hamsters look almost exactly like tribbles?

LOL! Is hamsterdance still on the web? Used to be www.hamsterdance.com right?

Edit: I just checked...lol! It's still there, but all new and improved. The hamsters have new hits out now.

Bladibla · Mar 7, 2005

I wonder if this thread will be dead by the time M-theory is 'verified'...

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

polyb said:

WELCOME TO THE BREAK!

Here at page 102, we have a heated challenge for who will claim the title of 'Thread Killer Champion!', the coveted prize will be an all expense paid trip to an insane asylum complete with shock treatment and plenty of drugs! The second place winner will be limited to the politics forum where they can exercise their skill at killing threads and squashing any real debate! All other contestants will have to hang their heads in shame and carry on with barely any semblence of civil discourse.

So far in the standings we have the follwing contenders:

Moonbare-that's right folks she's still showing her arse and is fighting viscously for that free trip!

Tripdog-Who is so thurooughly entertained that he just keeps it going for kicks!

Frannikki- His sense of self righteous nihlism won't let him leave this thread, besides, he knows he needs therapy!

Bart- Apparently he is having a cow!

Evo- It's either the nuthouse or Evoia, she doesn't care which as long as she is still the forum goddess and overlord!

BobGee- Since his attempts at being a beegee has failed he figures this might be his chance for glory!

Dexterboy-Hanging out in the hash houses of belguim, this is the only way he can escape his graduate thesis work and the tedium of ameircan hippies with no wit!

Fartman-having failed at art, he figured this would be a good scatological end to his dreams!

Will this thread ever end?
Do our contestants know how if there is truly a bottom to this bottomless pit?
Why do they waste their time?
Is there anything better on this forum?
Where is Greg the hairy one?

That's all for now folks, stay tuned to find out if this thread will ever find it's resting place in the web arhives where is should have been laid to rest when it was hashed out of tribs devious brane!

Ooooh, clever and sneaky. Actually write something insulting to drive away everyone. (The one aimed at me was a particularly low blow I might add: scatological indeed, my humor is far cleaner and higher level than that.)

Meyeah, well it didn't work, see! I'm givin' you till the count of three to get out of here, see.

One...

BLAM BLAM BLAM RAT ta TAT a TAT BLAM

Oops, I guess I failed at counting too. Meyeah. :devil:

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

Actually the Mayan empire crumbled because the UFO's and the ET's that flew them here took them back to their own planet which is made of dark matter and coexists within our own atmosphere they are watching us even now and they are planning to come back and destroy the world by reactivateing their energy network taht they created when they made all of the pyramids this will cause a quantum skip and flux up everything.

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

See, the mayan people hid in the mountains (that is the regular people because the extraterestrials infiltrated them and when they discovered they hid in caves where they are waiting even now till it is safe to come out again.) and then they have constructed shielded locations deep inside the mountains where they can safe when the quantum enihlation happens. (they predicted it would happen, so it will.)

Artman · Mar 7, 2005

dextercioby said:

Is this outta you imagination,or some shameless copy-paste again...?

Daniel.

I only copy and paste my own stuff for comic effect. I had a similar discussion a few years ago. I was discussing the fall of the Mayan empire with a guy in one of the forums and this other guy started posting bizzarre theories. He killed that thread. I thought it might work here. These are my own made up theories.

Evo · Mar 7, 2005

***Official Kill Report***

We interrupt this thread to announce the official kill of a very popular thread by...drumroll please...ARTMAN!

Are you a nerd?

is now deceased.

I have decided that if a thread lies dormant for 5 days, it is officially dead.

This was the pirate thread for gawd sakes! How could you people let this happen?

Congratultions to Artman for a successful kill.

***back to your regularly scheduled thread***

tribdog · Mar 7, 2005

I really better call it a night. good night all. I could really snap here and end up forcing a closure and I'd hate to do that.

Moonbear · Mar 7, 2005

Evo said:

***Official Kill Report***

We interrupt this thread to announce the official kill of a very popular thread by...drumroll please...ARTMAN!

Are you a nerd?

is now deceased.

I have decided that if a thread lies dormant for 5 days, it is officially dead.

This was the pirate thread for gawd sakes! How could you people let this happen?

Congratultions to Artman for a successful kill.

***back to your regularly scheduled thread***

We will all mourn its loss. :cry:

It was such a loved thread. *heads over to study Artman's artful kill technique*

Artman · Mar 8, 2005

Evo said:

***Official Kill Report***

We interrupt this thread to announce the official kill of a very popular thread by...drumroll please...ARTMAN!

Are you a nerd?

is now deceased.

I have decided that if a thread lies dormant for 5 days, it is officially dead.

This was the pirate thread for gawd sakes! How could you people let this happen?

Congratultions to Artman for a successful kill.

***back to your regularly scheduled thread***

I told you I was good.

Artman · Mar 8, 2005

Oh and by the way, AArrrrrrggggghhhh I be a seafarin', rum guzzlin', harrrrrd drive installin', wench lovin' (don't tell the wife I called her that), basketball playing, Thread Killing, nerd cap'n with a Spanish/Mexican God complex, I guess. Arrrggghhhh.

Hey, it worked in the nerd thread.

Moonbear · Mar 8, 2005

Bartholomew said:

Couldn't anyone revive the nerds thread at any time?

Someone could, but someone bringing a dead thread back to the top rarely rejuvenates the thread; it's just dragging a corpse around then. Now we know, it has to be dead for a 5 day count to truly be dead. I think that's a reasonable time. Sort of how boxers need to be down for a 10 count, or wrestlers pinned for a 3 count, a thread must be down for a 5 count (of days).

Bartholomew · Mar 9, 2005

This thread will not end, ever, as long as PF is alive. Quit your tired talk of killing it. It will continue. We'll all just post here every day, and the thread won't ever go away.

dextercioby · Mar 9, 2005

Unless,something bad happens to the:
1.Internet.
2.PF servers.
3.Greg decides he's had enough of this thread.
4.All frequent posters lose their:
a) interest.
b)computers.
c)life.

Daniel.

P.S.It's not a quiz,no need to circle/bold the answers...

Evo · Mar 9, 2005

dextercioby said:

4.All frequent posters lose their:
a) interest.
b)computers.
c)life.

Daniel.

Number 4)c can't happen to the posters on this thread because they clearly do not currently have a life.

4.c) should be changed to read - c)get a life

Evo · Mar 9, 2005

oooh, look at the post count! Think it will hit 2000 tomorrow?

Perhaps I should give away a prize. Maybe a "get out of being banned" card, similar to the "get out of jail free" card in Monopoly?

Artman · Mar 10, 2005

Good day to everyone. Since we are now discussing movies, I thought maybe we could kill this thread with discussion of -- Darn there goes one of those MIH bugs STOMP! CRUNCH! -- Hey, I wonder if MIH knows that MIH bugs have the same initals? -- Anyway, I was thinking if we discussed really bad ones, we could kill the thread (or the stench might at least drive away the MIH bugs).

What do you think, have we really pissed off Bart yet?

Anyway, I would like to begin with the "Royal Tenenbaums," a meandering, self important putrid stinking pile of green grass growing waste of time and talent. I hated every character, was way ahead of the plot, disgusted by the premise, and didn't care for the direction. It was sicker than Bart's description of this thread.

How about you guys? What movie did you hate? I don't mean ones that are so bad they are funny, like "Plan 9 From Outer Space" or "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes," I like them.

Moonbear · Mar 10, 2005

I can't believe this thread is still on the same page I left it on last night! I sense that we're wearing down some people, maybe a few thread-killer wannabes have dropped from the competition. :devil:

Artman · Mar 10, 2005

Clear...

ZAP!

Thump thump, thump thump, thump thump...

either we have a heart beat, or we're running over MIH bugs.

Moonbear · Mar 10, 2005

I'm not sure, I think it's the MIH bugs we're running over. (We're going to be in BIG trouble if MIH comes in and sees us talking about MIH bugs without reading the rest of the thread

) Careful, she's a good aim with that shotgun.

Moonbear · Mar 10, 2005

Ooh, that gives me an idea. *grabs defibrillator paddles* ZAP
*waits for charge*
ZAP

That seems to work really well on those MIH bugs!

ZAP STOMP ZAP CRUNCH STOMP CRUNCH ZAP ZAP STOMP CRUNCH CRUNCH STOMP ZAP

I think we're making some headway now!

Math Is Hard · Mar 10, 2005

Moonbear said:

I'm not sure, I think it's the MIH bugs we're running over. (We're going to be in BIG trouble if MIH comes in and sees us talking about MIH bugs without reading the rest of the thread ) Careful, she's a good aim with that shotgun.

Don't make me come in there!

oops, too late.

mattmns · Mar 10, 2005

Approaching 2000...

Moonbear · Mar 10, 2005

Yeah, but the way it was going last night, I thought we'd have hit 2000 by morning. It's been a REALLY slow day here.

franznietzsche · Mar 10, 2005

Moonbear said:

Yeah, but the way it was going last night, I thought we'd have hit 2000 by morning. It's been a REALLY slow day here.

That's because you haven't been posting enough. Come on and put out already. let's get to 2000.

Wow, this is growing much faster than the quetion thread ever did. Sad.

Thread Killer Champions: Franzbear & Moonbear

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