Collection of Science Jokes P2

[MikeeMiracle]

 

[BillTre]

 

[Jarvis323]

My head "exploded" the other day . After staying up all night, as I began to fall asleep, there was a sudden extreme burst of noise and light in my head. The level of realism was kind of strange. It was distinct and clear, but not realistic enough to think it was a real sound.

 

[Baluncore]

The level of realism was kind of strange. It was distinct and clear, but not realistic enough to think it was a real sound.

Welcome to the unreal world of hypnagogic dreams.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypnagogia

 

[Jarvis323]

Welcome to the unreal world of hypnagogic dreams.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypnagogia

Besides the sound and light, right before it happened, I was aware and noted to myself that I was in an odd state where I felt like half my mind had crossed into a sleeping state, and the other half was still awake. And then at the moment my head exploded, it was as if there was some kind of short circuit between those two states, and as though some electricity or something suddenly traversed from one part of my brain to another.

 

[Baluncore]

And then at the moment my head exploded, it was as if there was some kind of short circuit between those two states, and as though some electricity or something suddenly traversed from one part of my brain to another.

The "hypnogogic jerk" at the moment you recover balance, is characteristic of not lying down when going to sleep. Horses and cattle don't have that problem. Try sitting with a book in your hand, with your elbo on the table, fore arm upright. When you nod off, your arm will fall, and the sound will awaken you, so you can immediately recall the hypnagogic dream.

 

[davenn]

 

[Ivan Seeking]

The "hypnogogic jerk" at the moment you recover balance, is characteristic of not lying down when going to sleep. Horses and cattle don't have that problem. Try sitting with a book in your hand, with your elbo on the table, fore arm upright. When you nod off, your arm will fall, and the sound will awaken you, so you can immediately recall the hypnagogic dream.

I once read that Einstein did this by holding a paper weight. If he fell asleep, he dropped it and woke himself up. He allegedly did this to maintain a hypnogogic state.

 

[BillTre]

 

[mfb]

Why would you go to a division expert for counseling?

 

[Ibix]

Especially one with that name. I sense a divorced artist...

 

[Borg]

A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building. Don't do it he yells, You have so much potential!

 

[fresh_42]

A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building. Don't do it he yells, You have so much potential!

Yes, he answered. But back on earth, I will have much more momentum!

 

[Borg]

Next...

A woman complained to her friend, I tried having a menais a trois with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three body problem.

 

[mfb]

Take an airplane, maximize potential and momentum at the same time.
(space tourism goes beyond that, but it minimizes your money)

 

[BillTre]

 

[collinsmark]

View attachment 287456

I like the mouseover that goes with it (you can read it by hovering your mouse over the comic in the original),

"How could anyone consider themselves a well-rounded adult without a basic understanding of silicate geochemistry? Silicates are everywhere! It's hard to throw a rock without throwing one!"​

(Source page: https://xkcd.com/2501/)

 

[Ivan Seeking]

Next...

A woman complained to her friend, I tried having a menais a trois with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three body problem.

Amateurs. You solve it as 3 two-body problems with peer review.

 

[BillTre]

 

[Arjan82]

A Biologist, a Chemist and a Statistician Are Out Hunting

The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left.
The chemist shoots at the same deer and misses five feet to the right.
The statistician shouts, "We got him!"

(Ps I mainly post this so I get actual notifications on this thread, I know the watch button, but then it doesn't give my a notification anyway)

 

[Keith_McClary]

Doonesbury by Garry Trudeau for August 15, 2021​

 

[CynicusRex]

An exponential and a logarithm walk into a bar.
After ordering the bartender asks: “Alright, who's paying?”
The exponential: “Me, because logarithme népérien.”

 

[ergospherical]

 

[BillTre]

 

[BillTre]

 

[BillTre]

 

[DrGreg]

Inventor: It will have three hands and the third hand is the second hand.

 

[DennisN]

View attachment 287576

"So are you going to follow the advice of your ancestor?"
"Don't know. It seemed kind of fishy."

 

[Baluncore]

Inventor: It will have three hands and the third hand is the second hand.

On the other hand, a second hand clock will give the time it was at the same time on someone else's previous day. To get ahead, you must buy yourself a new clock, or you will always be repeating the past.

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 287576

The real reason of what had happened:

 

[Borg]

Spoiler: Why do quantum physicists have the best sex?

Because they know all of the super positions.

 

[DennisN]

View attachment 287576

The real reason of what had happened:

View attachment 287606

This comic is one of my all-time favorites, I think it's hilarious :
(if I remember correctly it has been posted before in this thread, but I don't remember who posted it)

 

[fresh_42]

This comic is one of my all-time favorites, I think it's hilarious :
(if I remember correctly it has been posted before in this thread, but I don't remember who posted it)

View attachment 287642

I once linked exactly this cartoon in the jokes thread, but I couldn't find it, so I improvised.

 

[Borg]

Spoiler: Why does a burger have less energy than a steak?

Because it’s in its ground state.

 

[fresh_42]