Great one-liners from PF members

[phinds]

My mother says the exact same thing.

Wait ... Russ is your mother?

 

[Vanadium 50]

Wait ... Russ is your mother?

That explains so much.

 

[Wrichik Basu]

Wait ... Russ is your mother?

Some days back, I said to a friend,

Imagination is more important than knowledge.

Einstein said the exact same thing.

Wait...am I Einstein?

 

[russ_watters]

Jeez, with the one-liners guys...

Wait ... Russ is your mother?

Einstein said the exact same thing.

Wait...am I Einstein?

Actually, I think it means my mother is @Wrichik Basu's mother...and Einstein.

 

[Frigus]

If you want to have a $1M salary, you might be better off starting your own business. It's the easiest/hardest way to get there.

 

[OmCheeto]

He's not wrong.

Coincidentally, the very next day I was researching the "Duck Test", when I ran across something that made me think that you might be an active editor for Wikipedia:

 

[phinds]

I think this exchange HAS to rate at least an honorable mention. This has GOT to be the best set-up @Nugatory has seen in years:

Davenn: Well if you want to be that picky, all changes in the EM field ALSO propagate at the speed of light
phinds: As do comments by all us nitpickers here on PF
Nugatory: Those actually move at speeds faster than light, but there is no violation of relativity because they transfer no information.

 

[kuruman]

If something can't go on forever, it won't.

 

[Vanadium 50]

That is not original, I'm afraid.

 

[kuruman]

That is not original, I'm afraid.

Thanks for the clarification; consider it a finder's recognition fee.

 

[jack action]

So if I study Container Classes and STL, I am knocking on the door of data-structures already?

More like trying to sneak in by a second-story window.

 

[Tom.G]

And @phinds strikes again!

You are mixing apples and oranges, so naturally your conclusion is bananas

(If this was a horse race, I think he would be three lengths ahead!)

 

[epenguin]

Doesn't $4 \times 10^{-7}m$ seem just a little small for a satellite orbit?

 

[sysprog]

RSVP! If I trouble to help your homework and you never reply or react I will enter your name in a black book and not help you next time.

[humorousness here intended]

I sympathize with your wanting a response when you've taken the trouble to help; however, I also question the ideolection of your adjurement: doesn't RSVP (répondez s'il vous plaît $-$ literally, 'respond if [the French word 'il' is superfluously masculine in this expression wherefore I think that 'it' is a better translation than 'he' in this context would be] it you pleases'), include the meaning of responding being optional? If I get a card that says RSVP is it impolite to not have responded to the effect that I won't be attending? Isn't it true that I should feel obligated to respond if and only if I intend to show up at the referenced invitational event?

 

[strangerep]

[humorousness here intended]

If I get a card that says RSVP is it impolite to not have responded to the effect that I won't be attending?

Is this question serious, or some kind of humour that I don't get?

If the former, then yes, failing to respond would be impolite, since the host needs to estimate the number of attendees for logistical planning reasons.

Unless you think the host is a complete tosser that you never wish to interact with ever again, I believe it's polite to send a reply giving some reasonable-sounding excuse why you can't come, but nevertheless wishing them well for their event.

 

[phinds]

Is this question serious, or some kind of humour that I don't get?

I had the same problem. The post doesn't really seem coherent which is very odd for sysprog, I don't recall his posts being like that in the past.

@sysprog it looks like your humor fell flat this time. It happens to the best of us. Here's an example where it really DID happen to one of the greatest humorists of all time:
https://www.newenglandhistoricalsociety.com/mark-twain-bombs-historys-first-roast/

 

[Bystander]

it really DID happen to one of the greatest humorists of all time:

Poets do NOT have senses of humor.

 

[phinds]

Poets do NOT have senses of humor.

Well, maybe but there were prose luminaries there as well and apparently all were horrified. Twain just flat blew it.

 

[sysprog]

Is this question serious, or some kind of humour that I don't get?

I think that it's serious-comedic and that you get it rather well.

If the former, then yes, failing to respond would be impolite, since the host needs to estimate the number of attendees for logistical planning reasons.

Of course; however, shouldn't the default presumption be that the non-responding invitee doesn't intend to attend? Isn't the need for me to respond stronger if I am going to attend than if I'm not? I don't need a chair to be reserved for me if I'm not going to be there, and if I show up without having responded, if there's no chair for me then that's my fault. I think that your not responding should be taken to mean a default presumption that you won't be attending.

Unless you think the host is a complete tosser that you never wish to interact with ever again, I believe it's polite to send a reply giving some reasonable-sounding excuse why you can't come, but nevertheless wishing them well for their event.

requoting this part for its haha value:

Unless you think the host is a complete tosser that you never wish to interact with ever again,

I think that we should not without sufficient cause impose duty on our friends; however, if I receive a message that says RSVP, I will respond, and will earnestly endeavor that I not fail to do as I will then have in my response said.

 

[sysprog]

@phinds thank for that comment -- I'll mull it over . . .

 

[StevieTNZ]

One of my favourites is "you must be popular at parties", stated to a member by some SA or mentor in a soccer maths thread. Very appropriate attitude I say.

 

[Borg]

This one isn't from PF but it was just too good to pass up.

I would agree with you but then we'd both be wrong.

 

[sysprog]

I wish that I could give both a like and a haha to that one from @Borg $\dots$

 

[davenn]

my fav. and why it has been in my signature for some years was from the late Jim Hardy
and it fits me nicely ...

"We old guys often have to dredge back through forty or fifty years of life's detritus to remember our basics and our RAM isn't completely non-volatile" -- Jim Hardy ( PF)

 

[sysprog]

my fav. and why it has been in my signature for some years was from the late Jim Hardy
and it fits me nicely ...

"We old guys often have to dredge back through forty or fifty years of life's detritus to remember our basics and our RAM isn't completely non-volatile" -- Jim Hardy ( PF)

I think that anyone here on PF might benefit from reading posts of Dearly Missed "old jim" Jim Hardy . . .

 

[jack action]

Again, @Vanadium 50 is still going strong at it (this one is very subtle):

Can a 4 stroke ICE be oil-less? Sure. In fact, they can run without oil for the entire life of the engine.

 

[sysprog]

@jack action how subtle is it when your engine seizes up $-$I don't mean to spoil the jest; however, I would want to help to save an engine $-$ if anyone is seriously in doubt regarding oil level of an internal combustion engine then please add some oil and then go to the oil change shop $\dots$

 

[phinds]

@jack action how subtle is it when your engine seizes up $-$I don't mean to spoil the jest; however, I would want to help to save an engine $-$ if anyone is seriously in doubt regarding oil level of an internal combustion engine then please add some oil and then go to the oil change shop $\dots$

Oh, come on. This is a JOKE thread. Anybody who takes it seriously deserves to have their engine seize up.

 

[Vanadium 50]

The line I am waiting for a chance to use is "with enough voltage, anything can be a conductor". The opportunity hasn't arisen.

 

[Ibix]

The line I am waiting for a chance to use is "with enough voltage, anything can be a conductor". The opportunity hasn't arisen.

Should it arise, though, you'll be unable to resist.

 

[Vanadium 50]

I induce that you have a great capacitance for humor, which I say without reluctance.

 

[PeroK]

I had something ready at work for years that I never had the courage to use (apropos management consultant-led IT projects): I bow to your inferior knowldege.

 

[OCR]

Should it arise, though, you'll be unable to resist

I induce that you have a great capacitance for humor, which I say without reluctance

This current thread has a shockingly high potential. . . therefore, we should not try to

impede it. .

.

 

[phinds]

Howing wolf. We need the howling wolf icon once again.

 

[strangerep]

Oh, come on. This is a JOKE thread. Anybody who takes it seriously deserves to have their engine seize up.

Indeed, especially since the symptoms should already be familiar to them. Hmmm, now where's that constipation emoji? ... Oh well,... these will have to do: