Thread Killer Champions: Franzbear & Moonbear

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In summary, Franzbear is the most prolific thread killer in the forum. He has killed at least 12 threads and is likely responsible for 21 more. His ability to kill threads is not a direct outcome of the evidence (number of last posts). You have to at least factor in the total number of posts by each person (posts in GD) to get a more accurate representation of the killer instinct. Franz and Moonie have so many posts here, they are more likely to be the winning killers. You have to divide the number of kills by the total number of posts during the same period to get a corrected distribution.
  • #5,356
zoobyshoe said:
Everyone around here from Joe on the street to the newscasters say the same thing: baby rattlesnakes give the worst bites. The older ones control how much venom they inject depending on the purpose of the bite. The babies inject all they have anytime they bite. Is this true? Only your herpetologist knows for sure.

I don't have any experience with venemous species, but I too have heard this rumor. My opinion leans more towards the opposite, so even if the baby delivers all its toxin, an adult can still deliver quite a bit more venom volume wise, if it chooses to, and thus is inherently more toxic. That said, it all really comes down to the toxicologist's creed "The dose makes the poison", if a baby or an adult delivers enough to kill you, that's all it takes. It always strikes me as funny when you hear someone say "It has enough venom to kill 20 men"...I don't care about those other 19 guys, how much does it take to kill just me! :bugeye:

Take a look at http://www.llu.edu/llumc/emergency/venom-er/strike.html from an expert in snake/human health issues if you don't buy my opinion, look right below his picture about 3/4 down the page.
 
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  • #5,357
DocToxyn said:
That said, it all really comes down to the toxicologist's creed "The dose makes the poison", if a baby or an adult delivers enough to kill you, that's all it takes.
Quite true. I suppose the rumor about baby rattlesnakes serves a good function though, which is to point out that they're potentially deadly to anyone who might think,"It can't hurt me. It's just a baby."

That link was pretty interesting. In Westerns you see people getting bit "accidently" by stepping too close to them. In fact, it seems, people really only get bit when they're actively molesting snakes.
 
  • #5,358
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Ut oh, I think Franzbear was helping Doc in the garden again.
 
  • #5,359
Oh if only Moonbear was here, she could suck the venom out.



I know she could because I've heard from the cancer clinic that she can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch, whatever that means.
 
  • #5,360
:rolleyes: Moonbear's not around is she? :rolleyes:

:-pI better hide now. :rolleyes: :-p
 
  • #5,361
Artman said:
:rolleyes: Moonbear's not around is she? :rolleyes:

:-pI better hide now. :rolleyes: :-p


Yeah, you're a dead man, good luck...
 
  • #5,362
brewnog said:
Yeah, you're a dead man, good luck...
It was fun while it lasted. :rolleyes: Gotta run now.
 
  • #5,363
zoobyshoe said:
Quite true. I suppose the rumor about baby rattlesnakes serves a good function though, which is to point out that they're potentially deadly to anyone who might think,"It can't hurt me. It's just a baby."

That link was pretty interesting. In Westerns you see people getting bit "accidently" by stepping too close to them. In fact, it seems, people really only get bit when they're actively molesting snakes.
I'm not so sure that only molested snakes bite. Sometimes rattle snakes strike without rattling at all. I've seen a rattlesnake that was under a truck. Granted, my uncle did try to shoo it away with a shovel, but the snake kept coming at him and not going away from him. It may be rare that snakes bite people, but people do get bit when they are not actively molesting snakes. I guess what the snake considers molesting could be someone walking on it by accident.
 
  • #5,364
Oh and should Moonbear come by, just tell her I'm not here.




:rolleyes:...Tell her I'm out polishing the chrome on my trailer hitch. :biggrin:
 
  • #5,365
Artman said:
:rolleyes:...Tell her I'm out polishing the chrome on my trailer hitch. :biggrin:
There's just no end to the euphemisms that you can come up with for that, is there? :-p
 
  • #5,366
DocToxyn said:
Dangit!, I knew...I knew I shouldn't have mentioned anything about avatars with Moonbear around... :smile: . Back to the drawing board.
Maybe a photo of a snake eating a frog would sufficiently gross her out.
 
  • #5,367
Danger said:
There's just no end to the euphemisms that you can come up with for that, is there? :-p
What? I don't want it to get rusty. :-p


:rolleyes: Moonbear isn't here, right?

Gotta run.
 
  • #5,368
Artman said:
Oh if only Moonbear was here, she could suck the venom out.



I know she could because I've heard from the cancer clinic that she can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch, whatever that means.
I'd be careful, you know she still has that electro ejaculator and she's not afraid to use it!
 
  • #5,369
Evo said:
I'd be careful, you know she still has that electro ejaculator and she's not afraid to use it!
EEK!​
:eek:


Run Away!:eek: :eek:
 
  • #5,370
Don't worry Artman. It is startling at first, but after your pain threshold increases the sensation is quite enjoyable.
 
  • #5,371
Huckleberry said:
Don't worry Artman. It is startling at first, but after your pain threshold increases the sensation is quite enjoyable.
So that's where you were when you were pretending to be down with a virus...
 
  • #5,372
No, I really had a virus. It was a nasty trojan. I forgot to clean the electro-ejaculator after the last person used it.

Did you know that you can contract syphilus from sheep?
 
  • #5,373
Huckleberry said:
No, I really had a virus. It was a nasty trojan.
Maybe should have used 'Ramses' instead.

Huckleberry said:
I forgot to clean the electro-ejaculator after the last person used it.
As the operator thereof, that would have been Moonbear's responsibility.

Huckleberry said:
Did you know that you can contract syphilus from sheep?
I've probably infected a few, but I don't think that's where I got it.
 
  • #5,374
Danger said:
I've probably infected a few, but I don't think that's where I got it.
Have you ever been to Italy? That reminds me of a bar I walked into once in Naples. Do you know how far away from the docks you have to walk to find a decent bar? IT's far.

I was at a strip club and there was a dancer on a small stage. We sat down and ordered drinks. The waiter's voice sounded raspy. I thought that was unusual, but didn't dwell on it. Then the buy me girls came and sat down next to us and asked us to buy them drinks. They had raspy voices too. Now I'm getting worried.

Just as the drinks are coming we get up and walk out. That is where I coined the phrase 'VD mouth.' I don't know what they had, but it wasn't a place I wanted to be and it certainly wasn't a place that I wanted to be drinking from their nasty glassware.

The whole dock area of Naples is just nasty anyway. They always warn the sailors and marines not to go out by themselves. One guy had only been on the ship about a week and didn't know anyone yet. He was out by himself not far from the ship. He was raped by three transvestites, or so the rumor goes. Whatever happened, it was serious enough that they shipped him back to the U.S. during a 6 month cruise. In this case I feel confident that the rumors were true.

Beware the docks!
 
  • #5,375
Huckleberry said:
Have you ever been to Italy?
I am disappointed to admit that the only places outside of Canada that I've been to are Detroit and Las Vegas. I'm not a traveller by nature, and even if I were I couldn't afford it. The only reason that I got to Vegas was because we won our trips down to the pool tournament. It's the last place in the world that I would have chosen to go to, but after the first couple of years I considered it a second home. Now we play for money instead, so I'll probably never get back. :cry:

Unfortunately, it seems that every country has areas that are best avoided, and most centre around the docks. (Damned sailors are a bad influence. :-p ) Despite the presence of Arildno, I've always thought of Norway and the other Scandanavian countries to be about the most peaceful and safe places you could be, but I've heard horror stories from there too.
 
  • #5,376
I've heard of winter long polka festivals in those countries. And the winters are very long there. That's a horror story to me.

I once won a carribean cruise. I received the notification while I was in basic training. Talk about a kick in the tail pipe!
 
  • #5,377
Artman said:
:rolleyes: Moonbear's not around is she? :rolleyes:

:-pI better hide now. :rolleyes: :-p

Not hiding well enough! :mad: Everyone has to have her talents.

Are you sure franzbear didn't get that bite helping his Auntie Evo with her tree? I think she sent him to pick some pretty tomato-shaped berries from those fuzzy vines in the backyard, and we suggested he get acquainted with the local wildlife by poking it with his finger repeatedly.
 
  • #5,378
Evo said:
I'd be careful, you know she still has that electro ejaculator and she's not afraid to use it!

Darn right! And I just got this nifty new one. Hmm, what's this label?
Danger: High Voltage!
Huh, okay, I'll remember that, set it to "high" when using it on Danger.

Oh, Aaaartmaaaan! :devil:
 
  • #5,379
Huckleberry said:
Beware the docks!
Don't worry, franzbear already knows all the dangers of hanging around the docks while his mom is trying to pick up sailors. :biggrin: :devil: (Anyone know what post that escapade started on? We hadn't even named franzbear yet, but that's when he got his knot tied for the very first time. :smile: He was so cute then.)
 
  • #5,380
Moonbear said:
Darn right! And I just got this nifty new one. Hmm, what's this label? Huh, okay, I'll remember that, set it to "high" when using it on Danger.
Hey now! You know that those labels are always designed for worst-case scenarios. It's like those things that say 'no user-serviceable parts' when any 5 year-old can replace the thermistor or whatever the hell quit. High voltage is just a manufacturer's suggested setting (and you don't settle for manufacturer's suggested retail price, do you?)
Besides, you know that if you're around, no electricity is required at all.
 
  • #5,381
Danger said:
\ High voltage is just a manufacturer's suggested setting
Ah, good point! Why settle for just manufacturer's suggested setting? *cranks up dial to highest setting* That should do it! :devil: Oh, Artmaaaaan, where are you hiding?
 
  • #5,382
Moonbear said:
Ah, good point! Why settle for just manufacturer's suggested setting? *cranks up dial to highest setting* That should do it! :devil: Oh, Artmaaaaan, where are you hiding?

I owe him some pain, too, Moonbear. Could you kindly turn the dial up to 11?
thx. :devil:
 
  • #5,383
Math Is Hard said:
I owe him some pain, too, Moonbear. Could you kindly turn the dial up to 11?
thx. :devil:
Any news on the tortoise front?
 
  • #5,384
zoobyshoe said:
Any news on the tortoise front?

Unfortunately, Tortie is still AWOL. I suppose the only hope would have been to employ tortoise-sniffing dogs to locate him, but I don't think the neighbors have resorted to that yet.

I don't know why I worry so much. Tortoises are resourceful creatures. Perhaps he made it down to LAX airport, wiggled past the slow-moving security, and is on a plane to Ocho Rios. :smile:
 
  • #5,385
Math Is Hard said:
I owe him some pain, too, Moonbear. Could you kindly turn the dial up to 11?
thx. :devil:

Hmm...the dial only goes up to 10, and then there's just this big red section. :rolleyes: *writes in "11" in red section* Okay, got it.
 
  • #5,386
Hang on one sec, you'll need more juice. Let me get my jumper cables... ok, take this clamp and attach it here.. ok, now put this clamp here... great! now we're ready.
Oh, Artman...
 
  • #5,387
Math Is Hard said:
I don't know why I worry so much. Tortoises are resourceful creatures. Perhaps he made it down to LAX airport, wiggled past the slow-moving security, and is on a plane to Ocho Rios. :smile:
Did you find out is he was local or from some more rainy climate? We had tortoises in N.H. where I grew up, but that is a very wet place compared to SoCal. Here, though, there are a few native desert species.
 
  • #5,388
zoobyshoe said:
Did you find out is he was local or from some more rainy climate? We had tortoises in N.H. where I grew up, but that is a very wet place compared to SoCal. Here, though, there are a few native desert species.
Tortie was a local apparently. It is speculated that he was quite upset over the recent L.A. mayoral election, as he was a known Hahn supporter.
 
  • #5,389
I've always taken SoCal to mean 'very Californian'. What does it actually mean?
 
  • #5,390
Math Is Hard said:
Tortie was a local apparently. It is speculated that he was quite upset over the recent L.A. mayoral election, as he was a known Hahn supporter.
Then I would search all the localities where his party is firmly in office.
 

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