Ask a Stupid Quetion Get a Stupid Answer

[zoobyshoe]

If you paint the piece of gold with some nasty, brown paint, it will not glitter.

Correct, of course.

Also, I think that if you dump the gold in some acid and take it out, it won't glitter.

I'm not sure about this, either, so it clearly constitutes the four remaining cases you need to get your twenty points.

Now do I get my twenty points (if you don't have them all now, I can take 3 payments of 5 points, and I promise to give you change) ?

Your points are in the mail. If they don't arrive soon, please don't disturb me about it.


Once, when I was busily painting my collection of gold nuggets with some nasty, brown paint, so they wouldn't glitter, it occurred to me I might work some interesting mischief by locating some dog droppings and spray painting them with gold paint so they would glitter. (This was in my callous, youth, incidently. I was 38 at the time.) I set to work.

A policeman passing by in his cruiser took an inexplicable interest in my efforts and asked what I thought I was doing. I explained my plan to him, barely able to contain my mirth. "Oh," he responded, "I thought maybe you were writing graffiti." and he cruised away.

And, now, having created this peculiar little set up, what would be the best stupid quetion for me to pose?

 

[Gokul43201]

And, now, having created this peculiar little set up, what would be the best stupid quetion for me to pose?

The obvious quetion : "Having now made the dog poop glitter, how do I go about convincing people that all that glitters (especially the glittery things I'm carrying about for everyone to see) IS gold ?"

Alternate quetion : "Should I have just told the cop that I found gold, but it really belongs to the goverment, so he should have it ?"

I'm not sure which of the two I would pick for 'best stupid quetion' because I don't know if this means 'best quetion that is also stupid', or ' quetion that is most stupid.'

So, what exactly (to an accuracy of four significant figures, or better) does 'best stupid quetion' mean ?

 

[zoobyshoe]

So, what exactly (to an accuracy of four significant figures, or better) does 'best stupid quetion' mean ?

That, grasshoppah, will be revealed to you when you have mastered the second belt of the Way of the Stupid Quetion.

A clue: the alternate anser was "best".


Will Grasshoppah Gokul not get ahead of himself with his progress in leaps and bounds toward ascendent mastery of the Stupid Quetion?

 

[Moonbear]

So, what exactly (to an accuracy of four significant figures, or better) does 'best stupid quetion' mean ?

5.9732 x 10^1929477790300889

It's the quetion constant.

What symbol should be used to represent the quetion constant in an equation?

 

[franznietzsche]

What symbol should be used to represent the quetion constant in an equation?

$$\pi$$

What are the units of $$\pi$$?

 

[plover]

The appropriate quetion constant symbol should take a long time to write as this slows the impetuous Grasshopper enough to see the True Path of Stupid Quetioning and not equate it to the myriad misleading Paths of Truly Questionable Stupidity.

Why is the True Path of Stupid Quetioning known as the Sheepfold Way?

 

[selfAdjoint]

$$\pi$$

What are the units of $$\pi$$?

Slices.

If $$\pi$$ is the question constant, and zooby was going around in circles, is this whole part of the thread just circular reasoning?

 

[Moonbear]

If $$\pi$$ is the question constant, and zooby was going around in circles, is this whole part of the thread just circular reasoning?

Indeed, which is why the True Path of Stupid Quetioning is known as the Sheepfold Way. If you run around sheep in a circle, they'll move exactly as you wouldn't expect. This is clearly demonstrated here: http://www.david-lewis.com/sheepgame/

So, if you want to follow the sheepfold way, just how do you go about folding the sheep?

 

[Gokul43201]

So, if you want to follow the sheepfold way, just how do you go about folding the sheep?

Grab two hooves on one hand and two hooves in the other. Now move your hands towards each other. Press the back down to form a nice crease. You have now successfully folded the sheep.

Did you know that a sheep can not be folded in half, more than seven consecutive times ?

(PS : Some people will show you that they can do more, but this usually involves pulling the wool over your eyes.)

 

[zoobyshoe]

Did you know that a sheep can not be folded in half, more than seven consecutive times?

I did not know this and it constitutes the most interesting news about livestock I've heard all week.


Once, when I was dangling upside down from a rope attached to my left leg over an icy river in upstate N.Y. USA wearing a straightjacket with a live polecat inside as part of my initiation into the Church of the Previous Deviation and Charmed Hebetude Accompli, it occurred to me that I was too young to give up eating Taco Bell food (the only abstention the church required) and that I should, perhaps, call the baptism off. What on Earth do you suppose happened next?

 

[BoulderHead]

Once, when I was dangling upside down from a rope attached to my left leg over an icy river in upstate N.Y. USA wearing a straightjacket with a live polecat inside as part of my initiation into the Church of the Previous Deviation and Charmed Hebetude Accompli, it occurred to me that I was too young to give up eating Taco Bell food (the only abstention the church required) and that I should, perhaps, call the baptism off. What on Earth do you suppose happened next?

You opted for Taco-X and became Grand Master of the Order !


What became of the polecat, did it pay Ivan a visit recently?

 

[the number 42]

Hey, why haven't I seen this thread before?

 

[Gokul43201]

What became of the polecat, did it pay Ivan a visit recently?

Not recently. It paid him a visit some years ago, and since then, he's been seeking it. I recall hearing him say something about the "galaxy" being on the polecat's collar.

Did you know that Ivan is really a trans-galactic hitchhiker, originally from Eroticon 6 ?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Did you know that Ivan is really a trans-galactic hitchhiker, originally from Eroticon 6 ?

I didn't know that, but it makes perfect sense given his penchant for raising the subject of the shape of animal penises in otherwise innocuous threads.


I wonder if it could really be true, though, since it is unlikely that anyone would give a ride to an Eroticonian with his thumb out. How do you suppose he got ships to stop for him?

 

[franznietzsche]

I wonder if it could really be true, though, since it is unlikely that anyone would give a ride to an Eroticonian with his thumb out. How do you suppose he got ships to stop for him?

Raising the subject of the shape of animal penises.


More importantly, how did he get the ships to let him off?

 

[Gokul43201]

More importantly, how did he get the ships to let him off?

Oh, that was simple - at least, mostly. He simulated the (planet Earth's) billy goat mating ritual, when he knew he was close to somewhere he wouldn't mind being. The startled hosts almost always threw him out immediately.

https://www.physicsforums.com/showthread.php?t=33062&page=1&pp=15

The ploy backfired (literally !) the one time that he hitched a ride with the grass traders from Lushmeadowia. You see, the Lushmeadowians are bovine, and they quite took to Ivan. Finally, the spent Lushmeadowians dropped Ivan off at Desertia - not a place he would have picked, before the mating began.

Considering that the only ships that ever go to Desertia are manned (or hooved) by the Lushmeadowians, how did Ivan ever find his way from there to Earth ?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Considering that the only ships that ever go to Desertia are manned (or hooved) by the Lushmeadowians, how did Ivan ever find his way from there to Earth ?

As an Eroticonian he is intimately familiar with the mating calls of a vast number of extraterrestrial species. It was, therefore, a simple matter of rigging up a transmitter and deciding which specie he wanted to attract to effect his rescue.



After their initial successes with ruby crystals, the early laser experimenters went wild trying everything in lasers from gasses to chicken soup. It was not till as late as 1977, however, that anyone thought to try "lasing" a weird, purple jellyfish. Having stuffed a little jellyfish into the tube between the two mirrors and "pumping" it full of energy, physicist Seymore T. Photodoodle was horrified to discover that the weird, purple light that resulted was neither coherent, nor uniform, but that it emerged from the device as a mass of wriggling tentacles that left a trail of molten, purple proto-jelly on every surface they touched. Unable to account for this, he decided to suppress all knowledge of the event, burning his notes, and hiding the laser in a hole under the tool shed in his back yard. According to Hollywood legend, though, he did take it out and demonstrate it once for commedian/screenwriter Dan Ackroyd, who, being Photodoodle's wife's great uncle's godchild, visited the Photodoodle home along with the Godfather during a large, extended family get together on Thanksgiving of that year. If there is any truth to this Hollywood legend about the origin of the idea for the ray guns in Ghostbusters why didn't they emit weird, purple light in the film, instead of green?

 

[Gokul43201]

If there is any truth to this Hollywood legend about the origin of the idea for the ray guns in Ghostbusters why didn't they emit weird, purple light in the film, instead of green?

Because of yet another unresolved property of the tentacular plasma ( what you crudely described as "a mass of wriggling tentacles" ). It is true that the tentacular plasma is indeed what emerges from the proton pack (obviously named to cover up the identity of the true energy source) of the Ghostbusters. When the editing crew was looking at negatives of the shots, they found to their amazement, that while white showed up as black and and blue became orange (or whatever), the purple from the tentacular plasma (TP) still looked purple. When the negatives were developed, all other things got back their original colors, but the TP looked green. The film-makers decided to leave things that way.

Who knows why ?

EDIT : (PS to zooby - Quote : "It was, therefore, a simple matter of rigging up a transmitter and deciding which specie he wanted to attract to effect his rescue."
Why does he want to attract currency ? )

I'll repeat my quetion : Who knows why ?

 

[franznietzsche]

Who knows why ?

Tentacular Commercialism.


Why do soap opera actors get paid?

 

[Spabath]

Hmmmm fair enough I guess







http://www.spabath.co.nz/browse.php?category_id=23http://www.spabath.co.nz/browse.php?category_id=32
OR A TOILET?!

 

[zoobyshoe]

Why do soap opera actors get paid?

I know. I have never seen one of them sing a note or blow a soap bubble.


Re: specie. Why is anyone confused about a stranded hitchhiker hoping to attract a little extra pocket money?

 

[Gokul43201]

Because money is illegal in Desertia. The Desertians depend entirely on the barter system, having realized that money is the root of all evil.

Desertia used to be a delicious paradise that had fruit salad growing everywhere until the disastrous Three Cherry Gambling Wars broke out all over the planet...but that's a different story.

If the Desertian Fire Department (for some reason, it was their job) finds you in possession of money, they use a flame-thrower to burn (melt, boil, or disfigure) the money, then they burn your pockets, and then they chuck you in jail.

Do you have any idea what Desertian prisons are like ?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Do you have any idea what Desertian prisons are like ?

Not personally, but I have read that mind blowing exposé by 10 year inmate Alexander Desernitsyn, Deserlag Archipelago, which made me so happy I grew up on Zoobonia, instead of Pinko-Commie Desertia.


Would Chineynman have said "tenticular plasma", or would he have used the more entertaining "mass of wriggling tentacles"?

 

[franznietzsche]

Not personally, but I have read that mind blowing exposé by 10 year inmate Alexander Desernitsyn, Deserlag Archipelago, which made me so happy I grew up on Zoobonia, instead of Pinko-Commie Desertia.


Would Chineynman have said "tenticular plasma", or would he have used the more entertaining "mass of wriggling tentacles"?

The most entertaining: "mass of wriggling tentacular plasma".


In Desertia, does the water freeze before it hits the ground?

 

[plover]

Water in Desertia does many things before it hits the ground in its frantic attempt to desert from its status in the material universe as water. It has been known to boil, freeze, fling electrons at passersby, spontaneously form itself into effigies of Spiro Agnew (not the Earthling politician, but the (on Desertia) much better known used lint magnet of Kanardikwak XII, whose sad fate was chronicled by Garbetiwex Uu in the oft imitated introduction to his manifesto on cantilevered opti-rivet factory management techniques The General Labor Theory of Fasteners, Quitting Time, and Dust Bunnies -- the scene as Agnew is ostracized from the town of A'a'å'a'nx after the ball of used lint which he had attracted grew to such a size as to become a traffic hazard rendered all the more poignant upon reflection on the recent collapse of the cantilevered opti-rivet industry on the introduction of the tiered-cam omni-bolt, and how the suffering of this transition might have been mitigated by a robust interplanetary used lint trade), and in extreme cases, fuse into neon in a spray of energetic photons that goes a long way toward explaining some of the recent mutations of the remaining species of fruit salad.

Is there any truth to the rumor that the Glorious Lemon-Lemon-Bell Revolution (only the current wave of revisionist historians would label it the "Three Cherry Gambling Wars") was engineered by elements in the former Deserterian Tourist Council who had an obsessional hatred of fruit salad?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Is there any truth to the rumor that the Glorious Lemon-Lemon-Bell Revolution (only the current wave of revisionist historians would label it the "Three Cherry Gambling Wars") was caused by elements in the former Deserterian Tourist Council who had an obsessional hatred of fruit salad?

Oh, good luck trying to sort that mass of wriggling historical events out. It was every Desertian for himself, alliances were formed and dissolved within minutes, no one had any idea what anyone else was up to, and soon lost all sense of what they, themselves were up to. A couple of them hunted themselves down and assassinated themselves, so confused were they about who was friend or foe.


Should there be a limit established on how much one is permitted to set between parentheses, or should we give a prize to whomever can fit the most?

 

[Gokul43201]

Let's give points. I love points - they're soooooo much fun. I'm still tingly all over in expectation of my 15 points, for solving the gold quetion.

I wonder why USPS is taking so long to deliver them. Do you think they want to catch me by surprise ?

 

[franznietzsche]

I wonder why USPS is taking so long to deliver them. Do you think they want to catch me by surprise ?

They usually tie them to bricks and throw them through your windows, so if you hear a giant van suddenly stop outside your house, don't duck.

Isn't "extraordinary" just a really unnecesarrily long and convoluted way( that mind you involves far more words that necessary, and i tihnk was invented just to make us sound verbose, i mean what everhappened to the being concise and clear in what you're talking about) to say "really normal"?

 

[zoobyshoe]

Isn't "extraordinary" just a really unnecesarrily long and convoluted way( that mind you involves far more words that necessary, and i tihnk was invented just to make us sound verbose, i mean what everhappened to the being concise and clear in what you're talking about) to say "really normal"?

Yes.


Which begs the quetion: should points be added to, or deleted from, "parentheses points" for typos within parentheses?

 

[Moonbear]

Which begs the quetion: should points be added to, or deleted from, "parentheses points" for typos within parentheses?

Well, if it's a stupid anser, then you add 4 points, multiply the result by -3, add 2, divide by 6, and then multiply the total by 0.

If it's a stupid quetion, then you subtract 100 points, multiply by 10, divide by 42, add 3, then hit "clear" on the calculator and write down the result displayed.



I've heard rumors that the use of paretheses in Desertia is illegal and if caught, the penalty involves a month of living in tight quarters with one's in-laws (if you don't have in-laws, they will be provided for you). Is this true?

 

[franznietzsche]

I've heard rumors that the use of paretheses in Desertia is illegal and if caught, the penalty involves a month of living in tight quarters with one's in-laws (if you don't have in-laws, they will be provided for you). Is this true?

yes, and the worst part is, they not only provide inlaws, but a spouse too.

now of course, when they provide the spouse the two of you must be married under Desertian law, and the ceremony usually involves a small rodent, a flame thrower, two spoons, and the hokey-pokey. i get the rest the of it, but why the two spoons?

 

[Moonbear]

now of course, when they provide the spouse the two of you must be married under Desertian law, and the ceremony usually involves a small rodent, a flame thrower, two spoons, and the hokey-pokey. i get the rest the of it, but why the two spoons?

Well, one for you and one for your new spouse, of course.

Desertian scholars have long disputed whether the true interpretation of the law calls for the Hokey-Pokey or the Chicken Dance. How was this dispute resolved in favor of the Hokey-Pokey?

 

[plover]

Desertian scholars have long disputed whether the true interpretation of the law calls for the Hokey-Pokey or the Chicken Dance. How was this dispute resolved in favor of the Hokey-Pokey?

There was never much of a dispute between reputable Desertian scholars. Anti-fowl social factions claimed that the Chicken Dance was "unnatural" because chickens do not eat fruit salad. Several institutes that were privately funded to push anti-fowl propaganda fanned social divisions into a media inferno. Following this there was a widespread belief that the Hokey-Pokey was the only version of the marriage ceremony that was legitimate under the law, but the text of the law actually makes no restrictions on the form that segment of the ceremony may take. There is, in fact, a treaty drafted by one of the revered founders of the Desertian government that states that Desertia places no restrictions on how its citizens "shake that funky thang" when marrying. The government currently has a "don't ask-don't tell" policy that it practices towards the llamas that officiate at weddings concerning what they witness the participants doing.

When Desertian scholars and llamas get together to dance this mess around, is it true that they do all sixteen dances? (I'm just askin'!)

 

[Gokul43201]

No that's just the average number of dances they do. You see, the Desertian number system consists only of primes. Though some mathematicians have postulated the existence of non-primes that exist somewhere between the primes (often referred to as ghost numbers), this concept is only vaguely formed. So, one tribe has a 13 dance ritual, while the other (the superstitious tribe) does the 19 dance ceremony.

What's a grecian urn ?

 

[Math Is Hard]

about $5.25 an hour.

What does he spend it on?