Collection of Lame Jokes

[Bystander]

Pull the other one. No one could possibly be THAT stupid.

 

[WWGD]

 

[Ibix]

So I've got an ear worm courtesy of the poor dead whale.

For the first tims in history
It's going to start rainin' whale

It's rainin' whale! Hallelujah!
It's rainin' whale! Amen!

Etcetera.

 

[BillTre]

Reminds me of a Randy Newman song about the river in Cleveland burning:

 

[DrGreg]

Not just Russian...

 

[wrobel]

Exploding Whale video.

sickest solution! )

 

[Wrichik Basu]

 

[jack action]

 

[WWGD]

There is an actor called Christian Slater. Would be nice if he made a movie with someone called Mo Slimsnau...( Mo Slimsnau and Christian Slater).

 

[strangerep]

There is an actor called Christian Slater. [...]

That one took me a few moments...

 

[WWGD]

That one took me a few moments...

Time you'll never get back ;).

I'll spare you the story of the gay shah and the geisha.

 

[256bits]

There is an actor called Christian Slater. Would be nice if he made a movie with someone called Mo Slimsnau...( Mo Slimsnau and Christian Slater).

What's a "snau"?

 

[WWGD]

What's a "snau"?

Just a stretch/made up term so I can say " Muslims Now and Christians Latter". Anything for a bizarre bad pun ;).

 

[256bits]

Just a stretch/made up term so I can say " Muslims Now and Christians Latter". Anything for a bizarre bad pun ;).

Oh I thought it might be an endearing term for Mr. Snuffleupagus from his wife as she coos in his ear before they retire for the night.

 

[Ibix]

Me: <looks both ways, goes into dark alley, raps sharply on unmarked door>
Doorman: <opens slit in door, looks out suspiciously> Say the password.
Me: The password.
Doorman: Welcome to the Lame Joke Club, Sir.

(Intriguingly, also works for gaining entry to the Mines of Moria.)

 

[jack action]

 

[256bits]

Sounds like a good name for a drink.
Judge walks into a bar.
Bartender:What'l you have.
Judge: A maximum Sentence.
Linguistic: A maximum Sentence
English Teacher: A maximum Sentence
Bartender: Concurrently, or consequently served?

 

[fresh_42]

Judge walks into a bar.
Bartender:What'l you have.
Judge: A maximum Sentence.
Bartender: Sit down, it'll take a while.
Judge (after hours of waiting): What's your name?
Bartender: Chomsky.

 

[jack action]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[256bits]

that girl looking into the car - I bet her fates hurt from too much street walking in those shoes.
tourist tip - wear suitable footwear when exploring the city sights.

 

[phinds]

 

[WWGD]

 

[phinds]

 

[Keith_McClary]

View attachment 272908

If you like that, see James Fridman.

 

[fresh_42]

Customer: "Are the $2,000 on my account plus or minus?"
Bank clerk: "Am I an electrician?"

 

[DrGreg]

Customer: "Are the $2,000 on my account plus or minus?"
Bank clerk: "Am I an electrician?"

Is that a current account?

 

[WWGD]

 

[Wrichik Basu]

 

[davenn]

 

[phinds]

Took me a while on that one.

 

[davenn]

another on the same theme ...

 

[davenn]

Took me a while on that one.

when is turkey day ? 24 ?

so tuesday this year