Collection of Lame Jokes

  • Thread starter quddusaliquddus
  • Start date
  • Tags
    Jokes
In summary: It's a humor that relies on absurdity and unexpectedness. It's not for everyone.Not a fan of surrealism, I take it?In summary, surrealism is an art form that relies on absurdity and unexpectedness, often producing incongruous imagery or effects. It may not be appreciated by everyone, but for those who do, it can be quite humorous.
  • #946
FtlIsAwesome said:
The year 2022: The IAU has voted to change the name of the seventh planet to Uranius, and has altered its pronunciation accordingly.

:-p

Yay :smile:!
 
Physics news on Phys.org
  • #947
The year 2222: They have defrosted Prince and he got a bluish face, so they rename it to purple-you-rain-ee-us.

(omg that is lame! :blushing:)
 
  • #948
DevilsAvocado said:
The year 2222: They have defrosted Prince and he got a bluish face, so they rename it to purple-you-rain-ee-us.

(omg that is lame! :blushing:)

:-p yes it is hahahah...
 
  • #949
:biggrin:
 
  • #950
FtlIsAwesome said:
Iom nöt cøømmuönist.
Ahnd I döönt shaære. Miyne, miyne, miyne!

Ökäy, I givæ it bääck:

"Øüwch."

(blöödy tightwädd )
 
  • #951
Alert: Avocadovorians have been roaming the area recently. All Avocados are strongly advised to remain indoors or in safe locations.
 
  • #952
FtlIsAwesome said:
Alert: Avocadovorians have been roaming the area recently. All Avocados are strongly advised to remain indoors or in safe locations.

 
  • #953
FtlIsAwesome said:
Alert: Avocadovorians have been roaming the area recently. All Avocados are strongly advised to remain indoors or in safe locations.
Just remembered something: I'm not an Avocado so I don't have to worry about it.
:-p
 
  • #954
SELF-REPLENSIHING PEPSI!
 
  • #955
The Gingerbread Warrior: Greater than a Ninja
 
  • #956
Physics Forums likes me.
Every time I login, it says "Thank you for logging in, FtlIsAwesome."
 
  • #957
What letter of the alphabet is most like a pirate ?

It's not an R.

It's a P,..because it's like an R ,... but it's missing a leg.

--

What do you call a dog with no legs ?

It doesn't matter, it still won't come to you.
 
  • #958
Isaacsname said:
What letter of the alphabet is most like a pirate ?

It's not an R.

It's a P,..because it's like an R ,... but it's missing a leg.

--

What do you call a dog with no legs ?

It doesn't matter, it still won't come to you.
Yes, these are really lame, and therefore acceptable additions to the thread.
 
  • #959
FtlIsAwesome said:
Physics Forums likes me.
Every time I login, it says "Thank you for logging in, FtlIsAwesome."
You've definitely been on a roll!
 
Last edited:
  • #960
DevilsAvocado said:
The year 2222: They have defrosted Prince and he got a bluish face, so they rename it to purple-you-rain-ee-us.

(omg that is lame! :blushing:)
Wonderfully lame DA. Thumbs up!
 
  • #961
What does a string theorist zombie say ?

" Braaaaaaaaannneeeeeessss "

A mexican zombie ?

" Beeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaannnnsss "

A vegan zombie ?

" Graaaaaaaaiiiiiinnnnnnnssss "
 
  • #962
Isaacsname said:
What does a string theorist zombie say ?

" Braaaaaaaaannneeeeeessss "

A mexican zombie ?

" Beeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaannnnsss "

A vegan zombie ?

" Graaaaaaaaiiiiiinnnnnnnssss "
Excellent! I didn't find this very funny at all.
 
  • #963
ThomasT said:
Isaacsname said:
What does a string theorist zombie say ?

" Braaaaaaaaannneeeeeessss "

A mexican zombie ?

" Beeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaannnnsss "

A vegan zombie ?

" Graaaaaaaaiiiiiinnnnnnnssss "
Excellent! I didn't find this very funny at all.
I did. :-p
 
  • #964
FtlIsAwesome said:
I did. :-p
I refuse to become entangled in an IIR (infinite ironic regress). You're good.
 
  • #965
Isaacsname said:
What does a string theorist zombie say ?

" Braaaaaaaaannneeeeeessss "

A mexican zombie ?

" Beeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaannnnsss "

A vegan zombie ?

" Graaaaaaaaiiiiiinnnnnnnssss "

A capitalist zombie?

" Gaaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnnnnnnsssss "

An enviromentalist zombie?

" Raaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiinnnnnnsssssss "

A traffic officer zombie?

" Laaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssssss "

A lunar expert zombie?

" Waaaaaaannnnnnnneeeeessssss "

A crippled zombie?

" Caaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssss "

A dog enthusiast zombie?

" Daaaaannnnnnneeeeeeeessssss "

A biologist zombie?

" Vaaaaannnnnnneeeeeeesssss "

A zookeeper zombie?

" Maaaaaaannnnnnnnneeeeeessss "

A medieval torturer zombie?

" Paaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnsssss "
 
  • #966
ThomasT said:
You're good.
yes yes yes
 
  • #967
FtlIsAwesome said:
A capitalist zombie?

" Gaaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnnnnnnsssss "

An enviromentalist zombie?

" Raaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiinnnnnnsssssss "

A traffic officer zombie?

" Laaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssssss "

A lunar expert zombie?

" Waaaaaaannnnnnnneeeeessssss "

A crippled zombie?

" Caaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssss "

A dog enthusiast zombie?

" Daaaaannnnnnneeeeeeeessssss "

A biologist zombie?

" Vaaaaannnnnnneeeeeeesssss "

A zookeeper zombie?

" Maaaaaaannnnnnnnneeeeeessss "

A medieval torturer zombie?

" Paaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnsssss "

OMG I am so glad I came to PF tonight :smile:
 
  • #968
HeLiXe said:
OMG I am so glad I came to PF tonight :smile:
Hi HeLiXe!

There's always something fun going on.
 
  • #969
FtlIsAwesome said:
A capitalist zombie?

" Gaaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnnnnnnsssss "

An enviromentalist zombie?

" Raaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiinnnnnnsssssss "

A traffic officer zombie?

" Laaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssssss "

A lunar expert zombie?

" Waaaaaaannnnnnnneeeeessssss "

A crippled zombie?

" Caaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssss "

A dog enthusiast zombie?

" Daaaaannnnnnneeeeeeeessssss "

A biologist zombie?

" Vaaaaannnnnnneeeeeeesssss "

A zookeeper zombie?

" Maaaaaaannnnnnnnneeeeeessss "

A medieval torturer zombie?

" Paaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnsssss "

...:eek: Holy...****
 
  • #970
FtlIsAwesome said:
A capitalist zombie?

" Gaaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnnnnnnsssss "

An enviromentalist zombie?

" Raaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiinnnnnnsssssss "

A traffic officer zombie?

" Laaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssssss "

A lunar expert zombie?

" Waaaaaaannnnnnnneeeeessssss "

A crippled zombie?

" Caaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssss "

A dog enthusiast zombie?

" Daaaaannnnnnneeeeeeeessssss "

A biologist zombie?

" Vaaaaannnnnnneeeeeeesssss "

A zookeeper zombie?

" Maaaaaaannnnnnnnneeeeeessss "

A medieval torturer zombie?

" Paaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnsssss "
I really don't want to appear lame. But I'm not sure if your latest offering is lame or not. In general that is. Thus, insofar as there exists the possibility of lameness wrt my understanding of your offering or your offering itself, then I suppose that you've posted thematically -- until authoritatively advised otherwise. Of course, I might not accept some ostensibly authoritative assessment of your post. And now I've confused myself again. Or was it you? Oh yeah, you're good.

Well, I thought that was sufficiently lame. What do you think? (To be honest, I think I'm stuck on a sort of lameness plateau. I want to go deeper, but don't really know how. Lead, and I will follow -- unless of course you do not lead sufficiently lamely, and then I will taunt you.)
 
  • #971
- Knock, Knock?
- Who's there?
- Polish burglar.

Is there something lamer than a Pole posting lame Polish joke?
 
  • #972
FtlIsAwesome said:
A capitalist zombie?

" Gaaaaaaaaiiiiinnnnnnnnnnsssss "

An enviromentalist zombie?

" Raaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiinnnnnnsssssss "

A traffic officer zombie?

" Laaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssssss "

A lunar expert zombie?

" Waaaaaaannnnnnnneeeeessssss "

A crippled zombie?

" Caaaaaannnnnnnneeeeeeesssssss "

A dog enthusiast zombie?

" Daaaaannnnnnneeeeeeeessssss "

A biologist zombie?

" Vaaaaannnnnnneeeeeeesssss "

A zookeeper zombie?

" Maaaaaaannnnnnnnneeeeeessss "

A medieval torturer zombie?

" Paaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnsssss "

:smile:

Oooh... good stuff.

@Borek: Yes, but I'd get banned if I did it! :smile:
 
  • #973
ThomasT said:
I really don't want to appear lame. But I'm not sure if your latest offering is lame or not. In general that is. Thus, insofar as there exists the possibility of lameness wrt my understanding of your offering or your offering itself, then I suppose that you've posted thematically -- until authoritatively advised otherwise. Of course, I might not accept some ostensibly authoritative assessment of your post. And now I've confused myself again. Or was it you? Oh yeah, you're good.

Well, I thought that was sufficiently lame. What do you think? (To be honest, I think I'm stuck on a sort of lameness plateau. I want to go deeper, but don't really know how. Lead, and I will follow -- unless of course you do not lead sufficiently lamely, and then I will taunt you.)

Are you "Tycho" from Penny Arcade?! :wink:
 
  • #974
nismaratwork said:
Are you "Tycho" from Penny Arcade?! :wink:
I don't even like ostriches.
 
  • #975
Borek said:
- Knock, Knock?
- Who's there?
- Polish burglar.

Is there something lamer than a Pole posting lame Polish joke?

That was incredibly humorous, thanks for starting my day with a laugh.

The knock knock joke was good too.

--

What's the difference between America and yogurt ?

If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years it'll grow a culture.

'drops microphone and walks off stage '
 
  • #976
Did you hear about the Lorena Bobbit computer virus?

It turns your hard drive into a three-and-a-half-inch floppy.
 
  • #977
ThomasT said:
I don't even like ostriches.

:-p

Hey, you've got the prose going, I think you should consider posing as him. :biggrin:

@Isaacsname: :smile:

"What's the difference between G-d and a surgeon? G-d knows he's not a surgeon."

@ivan: [URL]http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/scared/scared0018.gif[/URL]
 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • #979
Borek said:
- Knock, Knock?
- Who's there?
- Polish burglar.

Is there something lamer than a Pole posting lame Polish joke?

Yeah! a couple Jews not getting the joke for about 4 minutes. :frown: :smile:
 
  • #980
Last edited by a moderator:

Similar threads

Programming Jokes: Lame, Science & Math Jokes!
12
Replies
412
Views
24K
Reflecting on 47: An SMBC Comic
2
Replies
49
Views
5K
Bad Math Jokes
9
Replies
311
Views
29K
Weird / Interesing science related objects
Replies
7
Views
2K
What does it tell if you can (or can't) get this joke?
Replies
15
Views
4K
What Are Your Favorite Physics Jokes?
Replies
1
Views
2K
Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman! - My Favorite Book
Replies
21
Views
3K
Mini road trip: tigers and goats and bears, oh my
Replies
5
Views
2K
That Will Smith and Chris Rock thing
6
Replies
185
Views
8K
Collection of Science Jokes P2
105
Replies
4K
Views
388K

Hot Threads

Recent Insights

Back
Top