Collection of Lame Jokes

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In summary: It's a humor that relies on absurdity and unexpectedness. It's not for everyone.Not a fan of surrealism, I take it?In summary, surrealism is an art form that relies on absurdity and unexpectedness, often producing incongruous imagery or effects. It may not be appreciated by everyone, but for those who do, it can be quite humorous.
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Physics news on Phys.org
  • #14,912
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  • #14,913
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  • #14,915
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  • #14,916
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  • #14,917
Schrodinger's House. Stairs go up? down? both?

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Laying out a house floor plan, I didn't realize I'd chosen my typeface (and/or capitalization) poorly.
 
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  • #14,918
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  • #14,920
DaveC426913 said:
Schrodinger's House. Stairs go up? down? both?

View attachment 323418

Laying out a house floor plan, I didn't realize I'd chosen my typeface (and/or capitalization) poorly.
That looks like two entangled staircases, that have collapsed.
 
  • #14,921
DaveC426913 said:
Schrodinger's House. Stairs go up? down? both?

View attachment 323418

Laying out a house floor plan, I didn't realize I'd chosen my typeface (and/or capitalization) poorly.
Open shell floor plan.
 
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  • #14,922
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  • #14,923
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  • #14,924
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  • #14,925
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  • #14,926
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  • #14,927
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  • #14,928
A couple of Chuck Norris favorites:

Chuck Norris can recite all of the digits of ##\pi##. Backwards.

Chuck Norris once threw a grenade and killed 50 people. Then the grenade exploded.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Chuck Norris got rid of the Periodic Table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of species that Chuck Norris allows to live.

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but Jack couldn't dodge Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

Chuck Norris makes onions cry.

Chuck Norris once went to a feminist rally and left with an ironed shirt and a sandwich.

-Dan
 
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  • #14,929
phinds said:
When I get a headache I take two aspirin and keep away from children just like the bottle says.
:biggrin:

Do you happen to know a similar drug but with a different prescription , just asking for a friend - his a teacher at elementary school...
 
  • #14,930
artis said:
:biggrin:

Do you happen to know a similar drug but with a different prescription , just asking for a friend - his a teacher at elementary school...
Jim Beam.

-Dan
 
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  • #14,931
fresh_42 said:
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Brinton3.jpg

Samuel Brinton, the former Biden administration senior Department of Energy official facing charges for alleged airport baggage theft, faces up to five years in prison and a $10,000 fine. Brinton is accused of stealing a bag worth $3,670 at Las Vegas' Harry Reid International Airport on June 6, 2022. The bag contained jewelry valued at $1,700, clothing worth $850 and makeup valued at $500.
Samuel Brinton - the bad guy in a dress (a dress that he just stole from an airport luggage)

Now somebody needs to find a good guy in a dress to stop Samuel.
I suggest RuPaul!
 
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  • #14,932


Priscilla !!! Oh no!



Seems to me the recent situation with US freight train accidents is off the rails...
 
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  • #14,933
Why did the bicycle fall over?

Because it was 2 tired!
 
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  • #14,935
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  • #14,936
In homage to pi(e) day:
Screenshot_20230127-062141_Samsung Internet.jpg
 
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  • #14,937
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  • #14,938
WWGD said:
In homage to pi(e) day:
How is "3.11" pi?
 
  • #14,939
Bystander said:
How is "3.11" pi?

Bystander said:
How is "3.11" pi?
A little ahead .
 
  • #14,940
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  • #14,941
Saw a bumper sticker yesterday:

It's Not a Competition, Loser
 
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  • #14,942
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  • #14,943
My neighbor called the police yesterday because I was listening to AC/DC too loud.

They arrested him.
 
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  • #14,944
nsaspook said:
I remember seeing a video of a supposed haunting where a ghost moved items in the house for a five minute period at 1am or something nearly every night. A commentator observed that it was an interesting feature of the ghost that it apparently respected summertime clock changes.
 
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  • #14,945
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