Collection of Lame Jokes

[DennisN]

A funny t-shirt :

Source: here

 

[Orodruin]

A funny t-shirt :

View attachment 348008

Source: here

Technical objection!

 

[jack action]

Technical objection!
View attachment 348031

Technically, they could have used an image of the Rhinoceros unicornis:

​

Or better yet, its very close parent, the Rhinoceros sondaicus. With its worldwide population of about 76 individuals, it is truly the ... unicorn of the wildlife kingdom:

The paradox is that they are so rare that people may not recognize them as rhinos!

 

[berkeman]

I actually was burned by this "fidget toy" when I was a child

Me too, but just the outside of the barrel, not the glowing red part. It was in my "how far back does the hot go?" stage as a kid, which also earned me a burned finger with this...

 

[fresh_42]

I actually was burned by this "fidget toy" when I was a child and still think its inventor had nefarious intentions.

I drove them around with a forklift on a summer job as a student.

 

[fresh_42]

A 45 ports network switch.

 

[gary350]

My newest invention a dark flashlight. Shine dark on the enemy and they can not see you.

 

[phinds]

 

[fresh_42]

"Am I too fat?"
"I don't think so, but then again, I'm not a structural engineer."

Hand-to-hand combat.

 

[OCR]

My newest invention a dark flashlight. Shine dark on the enemy and they can not see you.

That's brilliant. . . .

.

 

[Tom.G]

View attachment 1720585869628.webp
How DARE they?
Sue them for false advertising. The attorney fees alone will cost them more than the 8% decreased material cost!

 

[Orodruin]

 

[Orodruin]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[berkeman]

 

[fresh_42]

https://www.facebook.com/watch?v=1112518359847333

 

[dextercioby]

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 348194

...FOR A MEANINGFUL ANSWER.

 

[MikeeMiracle]

A positron walks into a bar. The bartender says no electrons allowed. The positron - I am not an electron. The bartender - are you sure? The positron - I am positive.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Orodruin]

View attachment 348208

Now, writing on the other hand ...

 

[dwarde]

 

[fresh_42]

A British grocery store has found a way to brighten the dinner table and let you glow in the dark:

 

[Ibix]

The paradox is that they are so rare that people may not recognize them as rhinos!

Is that why that one looks so cross?

 

[WWGD]

A positron walks into a bar. The bartender says no electrons allowed. The positron - I am not an electron. The bartender - are you sure? The positron - I am positive.

Do electrons have mass? Bartender: I'm not even sure they're catholic.

 

[Orodruin]

A photon arrives at the airport.
Airport staff: "Any luggage to check in?"
Photon: "No thank you. I am travelling light."

 

[fresh_42]

Why can electrons never board an airplane?
Although naked, the scanner keeps peeping every time they walk through it.

 

[WWGD]

After a lot of discipline, I'm finally regular, and I clean my bowels daily at 7 a.m.
Unfortunately, I only wake up at 8 a.m.

 

[Tom.G]

Well, That is a big load of - - - - of laundry!

 

[WWGD]

Chewbacca to be named Wookie of the Year in his first season.

 

[jtbell]

Chewbacca to be named Wookie of the Year in his first season.

Which team does he play for?

(That's an invitation to hit it out of the park. )

 

[Ibix]

Which team does he play for?

Rashington Rizards?

 

[DennisN]

It was in my "how far back does the hot go?" stage as a kid, which also earned me a burned finger with this...

I know how it feels... it's kind of hot .
And then the pain comes after a while... a stinging pain that seems to not let go.
And I've had my affairs with small splashes of hot soldering tin too, that can also be painful.

Well, I guess those who haven't accidentally burned themselves using a soldering iron simply haven't soldered enough yet .