Collection of Lame Jokes

[davenn]

I bet a good chunk of the total are repeats.

but not within 24 hrs LOL

 

[fresh_42]

View attachment 348736

Perfect!

 

[fresh_42]

 

[WWGD]

Wife:
Have you seen the coffee filters?

 

[dextercioby]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[fresh_42]

Incontinental Airways​

 

[fresh_42]

 

[dwarde]

 

[nuuskur]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[fresh_42]

Snapshot of an endangered species​

 

[berkeman]

 

[jack action]

View attachment 348841

If this is what you see on a Ferris wheel, you clearly have been using it wrong:

 

[fresh_42]

If this is what you see on a Ferris wheel, you clearly have been using it wrong:

View attachment 348843​

I bet he'd rather saw this:

 

[DennisN]

 

[phinds]

SO true !

 

[DennisN]

Snapshot of an endangered species

What a weird looking phone! Anyone know which model it is?

 

[fresh_42]

What a weird looking phone! Anyone know which model it is?

It's the predecessor model of this one, foldable.

 

[jack action]

What a weird looking phone! Anyone know which model it is?

It is most likely a Gutenberg. I cannot be more specific on the model as they all pretty much look the same since the B42.

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 348752

"'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! THIS... IS AN X-TWITTER!!"

 

[fresh_42]

Scottish women pulling their husbands out of the pub.

 

[Orodruin]

View attachment 348514

On the same theme …

 

[jtbell]

View attachment 348815

I bet those won't make it under any airline's weight limit.

 

[fresh_42]

I bet those won't make it under any airline's weight limit.

I definitely wouldn't want to sit under the overhead compartment where it's put.

 

[Ibix]

A man was found dead in a vat of crushed chickpeas. Police say they are treating his death as hummuscide.

 

[WWGD]

A man was found dead in a vat of crushed chickpeas. Police say they are treating his death as hummuscide.

In a vat?( German pronunciation).

 

[Orodruin]

In a vat?( German pronunciation).

 

[jtbell]

Scottish women pulling their husbands out of the pub.

Whereas Finnish husbands carry their wives.

 

[berkeman]

Whereas Finnish husbands carry their wives.

Yikes! You know it's serious when the wives wear helmets!

 

[fresh_42]

Whereas Finnish husbands carry their wives.

And the English don't need wives. They compete with cheese.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[WWGD]

And the English don't need wives. They compete with cheese.

View attachment 348883

Safer than Pamplona. Running with the cheeses doesn't sound as cool, dangerous.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[phinds]

Safer than Pamplona. Running with the cheeses doesn't sound as cool, dangerous.

Yeah but they do it on a steep grade.