Collection of Lame Jokes

[jack action]

Too many good ones wrap in a single video:

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[BillTre]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[jtbell]

Spongebob Squarepants and his neighbors are being terrorized by a crime gang. In response, the police chief of Bikini Bottom has named the gang's ringleader Public Anemone Number One.

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[WWGD]

 

[wrobel]

No Sir!" says the string, "I'm a frayed knot!"

o yes humor for native speakers only
how I long to know English so good to understand such thing from hearing

 

[Ibix]

o yes humor for native speakers only
how I long to know English so good to understand such thing from hearing

I remember the first time I got a joke (almost) in real time in my second language. Everybody else laughed while I was still sorting out the grammar. So they all stopped laughing just as I started. Then they all laughed at me...

 

[fresh_42]

o yes humor for native speakers only
how I long to know English so good to understand such thing from hearing

That works the other way round, too. I often read good puns which simply do not translate.

 

[Keith_McClary]

I often read good puns which simply do not translate.

Translating Asterix jokes and puns: The genius of Anthea Bell (and Derek Hockridge)

 

[Ibix]

Translating Asterix jokes and puns: The genius of Anthea Bell (and Derek Hockridge)

My favourite is the English naming of the druid, Getafix. It follows the -ix convention of the Gaulish men. It's a reference to his intelligence - they often go to him to get a fix for whatever the problem is. And it's a sly reference to "fix" being slang for a dose of recreational drugs - and a druid might well have a fix.

 

[WWGD]

My favourite is the English naming of the druid, Getafix. It follows the -ix convention of the Gaulish men. It's a reference to his intelligence - they often go to him to get a fix for whatever the problem is. And it's a sly reference to "fix" being slang for a dose of recreational drugs - and a druid might well have a fix.

Getafix. Oh, the Gaul...

 

[fresh_42]

My favourite is the English naming of the druid, Getafix. It follows the -ix convention of the Gaulish men. It's a reference to his intelligence - they often go to him to get a fix for whatever the problem is. And it's a sly reference to "fix" being slang for a dose of recreational drugs - and a druid might well have a fix.

His German name is Miraculix. Fits. The puns are easier to translate than playing with words is, because they are situation comedy, and the situation doesn't depend on language. We have even complete versions in local dialects. But you cannot translate a pun which relies on a double meaning of a word.

 

[wrobel]

I noticed that jokes are completely untranslateable. When I was a pupil a guy from Bulgaria came to our class. He begun to speak Russian very quickly. Russian and Bulgarian are close enough. But at beginning he did not know Russian jokes and as we were gathering at parties he tried to translate Bulgarian jokes. It was not funny.
There is an international humor and a humor based on language and culture. I think that most deepest understanding of language and culture is an ability to joke and to understand jokes.
Sorry for offtop

 

[BillTre]

How would the Brits say Z Z Top (the band).
In the US, it is said "zee zee top".
In the UK would it be "zed zed top" or would it retain the US pronunciation?

 

[WWGD]

How would the Brits say Z Z Top (the band).
In the US, it is said "zee zee top".
In the UK would it be "zed zed top" or would it retain the US pronunciation?

And Omega-Omega top in Greece . Maybe in Greece, Omega is the word...

 

[DrGreg]

How would the Brits say Z Z Top (the band).
In the US, it is said "zee zee top".
In the UK would it be "zed zed top" or would it retain the US pronunciation?

Someone who had never heard of the group might say "Zed Zed Top". Or someone making an intentional joke. But everyone else would say "Zee Zee Top".

And Omega-Omega top in Greece .

No. "Zeta Zeta Top".

 

[DrClaude]

My favourite is the English naming of the druid, Getafix. It follows the -ix convention of the Gaulish men. It's a reference to his intelligence - they often go to him to get a fix for whatever the problem is. And it's a sly reference to "fix" being slang for a dose of recreational drugs - and a druid might well have a fix.

His German name is Miraculix. Fits.

In French, the names are mostly not related to the characters, so it does annoy me a bit that translations made the names fit.

 

[Vanadium 50]

There is an international humor and a humor based on language and culture.

In America, you can always find a party.
In Soviet Russia, Party can always find you!

 

[phinds]

In America, you can always find a party.
In Soviet Russia, Party can always find you!

Reminds me of a Yakov Smirnov joke from decades ago:

In American we have American Express. Don't leave home without it.
In Russia, we had Russian Express. Don't leave home.

 

[Vanadium 50]

As Garry Kasparov once said,
"Every country has its own mafia."
"In Soviet Russia, mafia has its own country!"

And, to be fair:
"In Soviet Russia, people sometimes rob banks."
"In America, bank robs you!"

 

[fresh_42]

And, to be fair:
"In Soviet Russia, people sometimes rob banks."
"In America, bank robs you!"

Bank robbery is an undertaking for amateurs. Real professionals start a bank.

Reminds me on the "Radio Yerevan Jokes" we told us.
https://www.physicsforums.com/threads/collection-of-lame-jokes.25301/page-214#post-6130092

Another one:
Question to Radio Yerevan: "Is it right that Juri Gagarin was given a mercedes for his heroic spaceflight?"
Answer from Radio Yerevan: "Basically yes! Only that it wasn't Juri Gagarin but Oleg Garanov. And it wasn't a mercedes. It was a bicycle. And it wasn't given to him, it was stolen from him."

 

[phinds]

I noticed that jokes are completely untranslateable.

Certainly there might be culturally or linguistic jokes that don't translate but in general I disagree with you completely. Perhaps you mean PUNS don't translate. That's certainly true.

 

[wrobel]

Certainly there might be culturally or linguistic jokes that don't translate but in general I disagree with you completely. Perhaps you mean PUNS don't translate. That's certainly true.

yes, I accept this clarification

Another one:
Question to Radio Yerevan:

What is better: to have a beautiful wife or an ugly one? The answer: it is better to sniff flowers together than to sniff sh*t alone.

In American we have American Express. Don't leave home without it.
In Russia, we had Russian Express. Don't leave home.

have not got it

 

[phinds]

yes, I accept this clarification

What is better: to have a beautiful wife or an ugly one? The answer: it is better to sniff flowers together than to sniff sh*t alone.have not got it

It's a joke on freedom in America vs repression in Russia. "Don't leave home without it" was a tag line in American Express commercials back then". "Don't leave home is a play on that".