Collection of Lame Jokes

[phinds]

So there was this flasher, getting older, slowing down, worrying more about getting caught. He started thinking about retirement but his final decision was that he would stick it out for a few more years.

 

[Orodruin]

That doesn't work in my country.

But Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch does.

Why don’t you shorten it in colloquial situations to Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerych?

 

[256bits]

So there was this flasher, getting older, slowing down, worrying more about getting caught. He started thinking about retirement but his final decision was that he would stick it out for a few more years.

Cricket audience.

 

[Orodruin]

I was shocked by the electricity bill last month.
I went like ”Watt?” when I saw it.
But now the tension is zero.

 

[Ibix]

Why don’t you shorten it in colloquial situations to Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerych?

Llanfairpwll or Llanfair PG are, I believe, the usual abbreviations. The origin of the name is unclear according to Wikipedia, but may have been a publicity stunt.

 

[fresh_42]

That doesn't work in my country.

But Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch does.

I am simply happy that my favorite whisky is from Scotland and not Wales.

 

[DrGreg]

That doesn't work in my country.

But Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch does.

I can still remember a silly joke from the British 1970s TV comedy The Goodies.

People get into a railway carriage at a railway station.

Through the carriage window we can see the start of the station sign, "Llanfairpwll...".

As the train moves off, we see the name on the sign slowly pass outside the window, "Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch".

When "...gogogoch" appears, the train stops and everyone gets out of the train.

 

[collinsmark]

I can still remember a silly joke from the British 1970s TV comedy The Goodies.

People get into a railway carriage at a railway station.

Through the carriage window we can see the start of the station sign, "Llanfairpwll...".

As the train moves off, we see the name on the sign slowly pass outside the window, "Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch".

When "...gogogoch" appears, the train stops and everyone gets out of the train.

Here's a link to the episode. It's "The Goodies," Season 05, Episode 04, "Wacky Wales."



Sorry that the video link has some unskippable ads, but it was all I could find. The train scene stars at around 4:30, if you don't want to watch the whole episode.

 

[fresh_42]

 

[malawi_glenn]

They don't sell green bananas at your store then?

 

[fresh_42]

 

[WWGD]

I have some drills.
Could be tomorrows DIY project.

I was thinking about this as my revenge
View attachment 305598
I don't like colmans mustard, but my wife does not like any kind of mustard. Not even dijon.

Whatever happened to XLax, Laxatives??

 

[WWGD]

Llanfairpwll or Llanfair PG are, I believe, the usual abbreviations. The origin of the name is unclear according to Wikipedia, but may have been a publicity stunt.

The town of Truth or Consequences in New Mexico, was named after a TV game show.

 

[OCR]

The town of Truth or Consequences in New Mexico, was named after a TV game show.

Yes, it was!

.

 

[malawi_glenn]

 

[BillTre]

 

[malawi_glenn]

Let's hope this is not inapproriate

 

[Wrichik Basu]

Let's hope this is not inapproriate

I think this has been posted here before, so not inappropriate.

 

[malawi_glenn]

I think this has been posted here before, so not inappropriate.

My wife just sent it to me, so I guess it is not inappropriate for that sake either

 

[fresh_42]

 

[Ibix]

Missing: Star Wars: long, long bar to the left.

 

[Borg]

I thought that we were in the time of Idiocracy. Maybe it's something to do with Event Horizon and The Black Hole.

 

[Halc]

Missing: Star Wars: long, long bar to the left.

Relativity of simultaneity says you can't be sure. Alderaamada paradox and all that.

While we're on the fururistic subject, George Jetson was born just 12 days ago. Didn't see that on the chart either.

 

[DennisN]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[jack action]

 

[dextercioby]

 

[fresh_42]

 

[jtbell]

But if you insist...

 

[fresh_42]

 

[jtbell]

So if you then lose the matching sock in the dryer, what does it come back as?

 

[fresh_42]

So if you then lose the matching sock in the dryer, what does it come back as?

Are there even reported cases?

 

[fresh_42]

 

[malawi_glenn]

Since I became a father, I have become much more meticulous looking at the laundry advice tags on things

I often give the advice on drinking plenty of water. This is the reason

 

[dextercioby]